Reckless Abandon (November Blue, #2)(20)

seem to stop breathing as C.J. absentmindedly flips his sticks through his fingers.

“What dude?” I ask.

“You know, that one you sang with. That Bo guy—he wrote that song for you, or whatever.”

Yeah. Or Whatever.

“No, he’s not coming tonight.” I shrug, Adrian stuffs his hands in his pockets, and Monica shifts uneasily. C.J. finally catches

on.

“Ah, shit. Did a one night stand turn into an epic fail?” He chuckles while gesturing obscenely, like a teenager.

“Shut the f*ck up, C.J.” Josh growls through clenched teeth.

“No, Josh, he didn’t know—” I start, but Josh cuts me off.

“It doesn’t matter if he knows or not; he doesn’t have to be such a dick to you all the time.” The last time I saw Josh this

angry, he was screaming in my face. Monica puts her arm around his waist.

“Babe, let’s go outside for a few minutes,” she whispers to him before leading him out of the room.

Turning to look at Adrian, I find him seemingly counting the floor tiles. “Um. So, tell my parents I’m not coming out till we

play, but we’ll have drinks after.”

“K. You all right?” He places his hand on my shoulder and lassos my eyes.

“I am.” I don’t even have to fake a smile this time.

Inexplicably, C.J. follows Adrian out of the back room, and I’m left there alone with another Bo revelation splattered all over

the floor. In a beat, C.J. returns with two beers. He unfolds two chairs, sits, and gestures to the empty one.

“Here.” He hands me a beer without looking at me.

“Thanks.” I accept the only apology C.J. is capable of before breaking the awkward silence. “I’ve gotta ask, is it the Dave

Matthews Band kind of ‘Rapunzel’ or “and they lived happily ever after” kind?’” I figure it’s worth a shot to decode his

nickname for me.

C.J. spits some of his beer in laughter, but before he can answer, Josh returns sans Monica.

“You two OK?” Josh paces toward us slowly.

“Are you? You kinda freaked out there.” I stand and hand Josh my half-full pint, he accepts with a smile and swallows the rest.

“All right guys, let’s get on stage.” C.J. leads us out front without further discussion.

As we start our set, I can’t miss my parents waving wildly from a table directly in the middle of Finnegan’s. I also can’t miss

that Adrian and Monica are sitting with them. Monica seems to be spending more time watching Adrian than our set. I’m sure she

senses something’s up between us, but since I barely know what that is I’m not going to offer anything.

When we finish our 80’s mild-rock set, C.J. leaves Josh and me on stage alone, where we ready ourselves to start our “folksy

shit.”

“What do you want to start with?” Josh asks, as we readjust our mics. “We kind of practiced a lot of heartbreak-y stuff ...”

“Well, I’m kind of in a heartbreak-y place. Just pick something. We’ll nail it.” Josh’s concern makes me smile, but it’s a

tad annoying. “I’m not a damsel in distress, Josh. Just play.”

He shrugs and starts strumming.

Shit, me and my big mouth.

Mushy heartbreak songs are the easiest to learn in a short amount of time, and quite frankly, they’re the most popular among this

bar crowd. I have a brief flash of panic when he intros Sheryl Crow’s “Strong Enough,” but I take a breath, smile, and roll my

eyes at Monica.

Actually, I really don’t feel like hell tonight, as the song might suggest. It’s amazing what a small amount of time and a large

amount of space can do to bury things that need burying. Swaying with the melody, I smile through the lyrics...until we get to the

chorus, which talks about believing lies in the name of love.

No shit ...

I realize this is the first time I’ve performed here since the night Bo worked my lullaby. I never told my parents about that

night; and I don’t think I can now. I almost lose track of the lyrics when all the feelings I had that night start to simmer in my

gut. I kissed him on stage, I cried on stage. I did things that were miles outside of my comfort zone because I thought I was in

love.

Just two nights after that I was sitting, battered, in the hotel room of my ex-boyfriend trying to sort out a two-week lie. My

insides scream with anger and talk of revenge, but I’m better than that. Guess he wasn’t strong enough to be my man after all.

A few songs later we end our set and head off stage. I meet my four fans at their table.

“November Blue that was outstanding!” Raven is nearly bursting out of her Zen shell as she squeezes the life out of me.

“Thanks.” I pull myself away and hug Ashby.

“Gorgeous, Baby Girl, I knew you had it in you.” They’ve never heard me sing in public before. This must have been heaven for

them.

“Listen, hun, it’s getting late and we hate to dash out of here, but our flight to San Diego actually leaves in a few hours. We’

ve got to get to the airport.” Raven puts her arm around me one more time.