Rebound (Seattle Steelheads #1)(20)

“Asher, you’re not a coward.” Geoff’s voice was as gentle as it had been last night—not hard enough to make me jump, not soft enough to sound patronizing. “You lived with someone who got violent with you. Fear isn’t weakness in that kind of scenario. It’s self-preservation.”

My hackles went up. “You mean the same self-preservation that made me stay with him for four years I’m never getting back?”

“I stayed with mine for six. You won’t hear me judging.”

That brought down some of my defensiveness. “Yeah?”

He nodded. “Yeah.”

Now I felt like an idiot. After everything we’d talked about last night, I should have known he’d understand. But what could I say? My brain wasn’t exactly in the habit of being rational today.

“You want to know why I didn’t get the restraining order?”

Geoff nodded. “Yeah. I do.”

I took a deep breath. “The thing is, it’s all public. There are hearings, and the burden of proof is on me. Then once the order is in place, the information in it is all public too. Knowing my ex, he’d go running straight to the press and make it sound like I was just conjuring up bullshit to make him look bad. There’s no way of knowing who will or won’t believe him, but I mean, there are a lot of people who are looking for a reason to say I shouldn’t be in the PHL because I’m gay. You know they’d find a way to spin this to say I’m a liability to the league and the team, and that queers shouldn’t be allowed to play.”

Geoff scowled. “I really wish I could argue with any of that.”

“I know, right?” I sighed. “That, and I don’t want my team to know the truth. They all know I’m gay, and nobody bats an eye over it, but this…”

“No, I get it. I do. And once something like this is public, there’s no pulling it back.”

“Exactly. So I just… I couldn’t do it. I still feel like I should, but…”

“I don’t blame you. I really don’t.”

I opened my mouth to say something, but an approaching car engine made my teeth snap together. Geoff heard it too—he straightened just slightly, eyes losing focus as he tilted his head like he was listening.

When the engine turned off, Geoff’s eyes flicked to me. “That him?”

I nodded. I’d have recognized the sound of my ex’s car anywhere. “Fuck.” My knees wobbled, and I gripped the counter for support. I’d been afraid he would show up, but now he actually had. He was here.

“You ready for this?” Geoff asked quietly.

“Not really, no.” But I started toward the front door anyway, and thank God, Geoff stayed right on my heels.

At the door, he stood off to the side. There was a nearly inaudible click, and I realized he’d unsnapped the strap over his pistol. Now his hand was resting on the butt of the weapon.

Our eyes met. He tilted his head toward the door.

I took a deep breath, and as my ex-boyfriend’s footsteps came marching up the walk, I turned the deadbolt and opened the door.

Nathan didn’t let the grass grow. “What the fuck is your problem, Asher?” he snarled as he crossed the porch, a finger pointed right at me. “This is some bullshit, and you know—” He froze, finger still hovering in the air and mouth still open in mid-syllable. His gaze slid to the left, and the instant he saw Geoff, the temperature in the room plummeted. When he cut his eyes back to me, he growled, “Really?”

Before I could speak, Geoff said, “Do we need to crack open a dictionary and look up the definition of the word ‘contact’? And while we’re at it, ‘harassment’?”

Nathan narrowed his eyes as he looked Geoff up and down. “Aren’t you a little far out of your jurisdiction? Pretty sure Seattle PD doesn’t cover Mercer Island.”

“I’m not here in an official capacity. However…” Geoff held Nathan’s gaze and clicked the mic on the radio on his shoulder. “This is Officer Logan. I need Mercer Island Police dispatched to my location for a domestic dispute and harassment.” Eyes still locked on my ex, he coolly rattled off my address.

“Copy that,” came the crackly response. “Dispatching two units to your location.”

An evil smile materialized on Geoff’s face. “And now we wait.”

“Fuck this.” Nathan started to back out the door, but Geoff caught him with a firm hand on his arm. Their glares locked.

Through his teeth, Geoff growled, “How about you come in and sit the fuck down?”

“How about you get your hands off me?”

Geoff didn’t budge. “Sit. Down.”

“You don’t have any authority out here, pig. You can’t—”

“And if I let you go, and Mercer Island PD sees you fleeing the scene, they’re going to chase you down.” Geoff half-shrugged. “Maybe even tase you if you insist on not cooperating.”

Nathan gulped.

“So you have two choices.” Geoff’s eyes narrowed. “You can sit down, shut up, and go to jail quietly. Or I can let you go, they can chase you down, and you can go to jail tired.” He raised his eyebrows and inclined his head in an unspoken, well?

Nathan held his glare a second longer. Then he jerked his arm free and straightened his sleeve with a sharp tug. I actually thought he might bolt after all, but instead, he stepped into the entry way and let Geoff close the door.