Present Perfect(18)

The feelings I had towards Noah kept gaining strength. I got butterflies every time I saw him walk towards me, away from me, beside me. The closer he got, the more intense they became. I daydreamed about him constantly; during class, in my room, in the car, when I ate. Basically, he was on my mind every minute of every day. I felt warm and tingly when I thought about something he said to me or when he touched me. I got goose bumps every time I thought about our first kiss, and I thought about it often.

Mom caught me several times in a Noah induced haze. One morning over breakfast, she and Dad actually staged an intervention. She even had a handful of ‘Just Say No’ pamphlets from the 1980s. I think they were from her own personal stash when she was a teen.

At first, I thought I was just going through a passing phase, just an innocent crush. I had always loved Noah. It was something I did naturally, without thinking, like breathing. I figured when we started hugging more and holding hands, it was just a natural progression of our friendship. Then I noticed how it made me feel and apparently these feelings weren’t going anywhere anytime soon. I thought we were both just ragging with hormones, it was a biological thing, and eventually it would go away. Well, I’m an idiot because just the opposite happened for me.





It was a beautiful day outside, so Beth and I decided to forgo the cafeteria and spend our lunch period in the courtyard area at school.

“Are you going to the dance?” She asked, as we were finishing up our lunch.

“What dance?”

“The TWIRP dance.”

“What’s that?”

“The Woman Is Required to Pay. Girls have to ask boys to go.”

“Then that would be a big fat nooo,” I said.

“You ought to go.”

“Why? I can’t dance.”

“It will be tons of fun.”

“I highly doubt that. Besides I don’t have anyone to go with.”

I balled up my empty bag of chips and tossed it in the direction of the trashcan, missing it by a foot and a half. I walked towards the crumpled bag, scooped it up, made another attempt at a basket, and missed again. How the hell did Emily score so many points during a basketball game with the basket hanging in the air, and I couldn’t toss a piece of garbage in a giant trashcan from a foot away. I made two more attempts before giving up.

“Screw it,” I said, walking back and sitting down on the bench.

“You have to ask a boy, silly.”

“Don’t do that again.”

“What?” Beth asked.

“Call me silly. Eccentric is fine. Quirky I like. Just not silly. I don’t like silly.”

“God, you’re weird sometimes.”

“Weird is acceptable as well.”

We had a few more minutes left during lunch period, so I decided to work on my color a little bit. Leaning back on the bench, I closed my eyes, and tilted my head up, letting the sun warm my face. I hadn’t been brave enough to get highlights in my hair, like Bitchani had suggested, but I had gotten some sun over the summer, and was trying to maintain.

Beth and I sat there in silence. She had been acting kind of strange lately, but I chalked it up to that was just Beth. She acted weird at times, especially when she had a boy on the brain. I peeked out the corner of my eye and saw her biting her nails.

“I’m thinking about asking Noah,” she said in a low breathy voice.

When I heard her words, the only body part that moved was my mouth when I asked, “Noah who, about what?”

“Noah Stewart, about going to the dance.”

I sat completely still for a full minute, attempting to process what she just told me. I tried to hide any visible signs of my increasing irritation, but my jaw was clench, and I could feel my nails digging into my thighs. The heat of anger and jealously surged inside me. Slowly I sat up and turned to face her. I put my best poker face on. I couldn’t let on to Beth how I was feeling. I needed to stay calm when I explained to her how incredibly stupid she was for even thinking about asking Noah.

“That’s ridiculous,” I said.

“Why?” She asked, lowering her hand from her mouth.

“Because it just is. He’s not going to go to a lame dance with you.”

“Why not?”

“Well, number one, he hates dancing. Number two, if he were going with someone, it’d be with me. It would be the first dance either of us went to and we do all our firsts together. Number three, the two of you can’t go out together without me.”

“Why can’t we?”

“Because I’m the glue,” I said,

“The glue? What?” Her face was pinched together in confusion.

“The glue. Noah and I were friends first. Then you moved in and I became your friend first. I introduced you to Noah. Then you became friends with him.”

Beth looked at me as if another head had sprouted from my neck. I slowed my speech down hoping my point would be clearer to her.

“I introduced you and Noah. You two wouldn’t be friends if it hadn’t been for me. The glue. I’m the common bond between the two of you. Noah and I can hang out together. You and I can hang out together. But you and Noah can’t hang out without me.” I placed my palm to my chest. “The glue. I’m the glue.”

Beth stared at me for a minute, and then shook her head. She looked down at her wringing hands and took a deep breath. “I’vealreadyaskedNoahtogoandhesaidyes.” She exhaled loudly.