Playing It Safe(44)

My throat is dry, and my heart is still beating wildly in my chest. Our breathing eventually returns to normal after a minute or two of complete silence. I pick the phone up off my pillow and turn off speaker phone. Bringing it up to my ear, all of a sudden I feel nervous, knowing that we’ve crossed into the big unknown and there is no going back.

“Are you still there?” His voice sounds more relaxed.

“I’m here.”

“Are you okay with—”

“With masturbating over the phone with you?” I ask.

“Well, I wasn’t going to say it like that, but yes, since you put it that way.”

“It’s a little weird, but nothing about us has ever been normal. Why should this be any different?”

“Good point,” he laughs lazily.

My eyelids start to feel heavy, and I yawn into the phone due to the fact that my body is tuckered out from the release I’d been holding in for too long. Either that or I’m turning into a guy who rolls over and dozes off right after having sex.

“You’re tired,” he says. “I’ll let you go, but only if you promise me one thing.”

All I can muster is a barely intelligible mumble of noises that I think resemble a yes.

“Go out with me tomorrow night.” He pauses and then adds, “On a real date this time.”

“Okay.” I yawn again into the phone. The fight has left me; that’s how good this little phone sex session was. Do I want to delve in and psychoanalyze the shit out of this right now?

Nope, not at all.

“Wow, that was easy. You’re not going to fight me at all on this?”

“Hey,” I say, a tad more alert but still overly drowsy. “Don’t push your luck, mister. Take the yes and call it quits while you’re ahead.”

“Fair enough,” he concedes. “Good night, beautiful.”

I smile to myself in the dark at his parting words and bring the comforter up to my chin, ready to snuggle into it further. And as I drift off into dreamland, sprawled out and naked as the day I was born, I’m still smiling.





CHAPTER FIFTEEN


I wake up the next morning with the birds chirping outside, the sun streaming through my windows, and my alarm clock blaring. It’s a scene right out of Snow White if it wasn’t for the hangover. I reach over with my free hand to hit the snooze button when all of a sudden it dawns on me. My free hand? What in the name of Sweet Fancy Moses is my other hand holding on to? And why am I naked?

Afraid that I might find a horse’s severed head in my bed, I gingerly lift the comforter inch by agonizing inch until a pink helmet with a smiley face comes into view. Phew! It’s just my vibrator.

Wait a second.

Fragmented memories of last night start coming back to me. There was a happy hour where drinks were had and I flirted like a champ with Alex. Then Lisette drove me home—shit, I need to call her to pick me up. I go to grab my cell phone off the nightstand only to come up empty-handed. What in the blazes is going on today? My head is beginning to throb as I look for my phone until I find it buried underneath the pillows. When I unlock it and go to the recent calls so I can find Lisette’s name, my face freezes in horror when I see the last name of the person who called and the time stamp. Now the rest of last night’s memories are flooding my brain in all their Technicolor glory.

Don’t tell me.

No, wait. Tell me that I didn’t do what I think I did.

I did, didn’t I?

Oh my God! I had phone sex with Alex last night!

I facepalm myself and groan out loud. The blossoming headache that was a dull throb has been upgraded to DEFCON level one status. Jesus, I’ll never be able to face him again without thinking he knows what I sound like when I orgasm.

First things first, I bring the comforter up to cover my body. Apparently I’m modest when I’m the only one here—well, me and the Bugs Bunny vibrator. Ugh, I’m still gripping this thing like it’s the Holy Grail of vibrators, so I toss it across my bed, where it lands by my feet.

I decide to call Lisette.

“Good morning, sunshine,” she says after answering on the second ring.

“I don’t know about it being good,” I mumble.

She laughs. “Let me guess—hangover?”

“Among other things.”

“Oooh, what other things?”

“Nothing.” My voice wavers slightly, and she laughs again. “Can you do me a favor and pick me up on your way to the office?”

“Of course. Can you be ready in about a half hour?”

“Yep.”

“See you then.”

As soon as she hangs up, I fling the comforter off of me, stumble out of bed, and race toward the bathroom. I take the fastest shower ever in the history of showers. All the while I’m not thinking about “the incident” from last night. I’m so not thinking about it that I’m thinking about it, which gets me to really thinking about it, to the point of dwelling on it.


It’s not the first time I’ve ever had phone sex. But the couple of times when it’s happened before, it was in an already-established relationship after we’ve done the actual deed. Alex and I have just started dating or whatever you call it, and the closest to doing the deed has been with our clothes on. Not one nip slip at this point, and yet I’ve allowed him to talk me into an orgasm over the phone.