Perfect Ruin (Unyielding #2)(58)

I thought about it. I was tied up in a bed with a man on top of me and I was completely helpless like I’d been for years, but it was a different kind of fear.

“Because I trust you so much. It’s terrifying.”

He let go of my shirt and lowered his body until his lips lightly brushed against mine. “I’ll never hurt you. But, baby, you know that already.”

His mouth lowered to mine and he kissed me again. It was urgent. Bruising. Harsh. His one hand pulled on my hair while the other slowly glided down my body to between my legs.

“Oh, God.” Arching my back, I broke from the kiss when his heated palm cupped me. He didn’t move his hand, merely rested it there. Claiming. Owning.

“Please,” I begged.

He trailed kisses down my neck to the crease between my breasts. He was slow and casual about it, taking his time as his heated breath and moist lips tasted and explored until he finally reached my nipple and drew it into his mouth.

He was gentle at first, the velvet surface of his tongue playing with it back and forth. I wiggled my pelvis trying to get him to move his hand that still cupped me. But his patience was resilient as he just held his hand on my sex with the slightest pressure, causing the anticipation to build.

My nipple slipped from his mouth. Then, he sat up and traced the red surface with his finger while his other hand inside my panties twitched and sent a wave of desire through me.

“Kai. Please.”

He unraveled me. Everything he’d done by bringing me here, the ice water, the belt, even tying me up, it was all to bring me to this point. There was no turning back for me now. I wanted only him.

“Pull on the wire, London.”

“Huh?”

He climbed off me and lay on his side beside me. “I want you to feel the restraints.”

“I do. I feel them.”

“I need to know he is out of you.”

What he was asking… I’d done everything he asked of me, but what I’d been through would never truly die. It was part of me and with Kai’s help, I’d fought back. Now, he wanted me to feel like I had so many times before during those years with Alfonzo and Jacob?

“Fight, London.”

“Kai. Why? I don’t understand?” Why was he making me do this?

“You said you trusted me.” I nodded. “Then I need you to fight. Feel helpless and vulnerable and scared.”

“I don’t want to.” I didn’t want that overwhelming panic that suffocated my lungs and gripped my chest so hard that it felt as if a vise was being tightened around me.

“Of course you don’t. But you need to.” He leaned over me, briefly kissed my quivering lips then got up from the bed.

My heart drummed against my rib cage as I watched him walk to the other side of the room completely naked. His cock hard and erect against his muscled abdomen.

He sat in the chair, leaned back, his thighs parted and his eyes dark and intense as he waited for me to decide what to do.

Kai was an enigma, but there was one trait I knew for certain about him and that was he’d never give in. Never yield if he wanted something. God, he’d searched for me for two years and I was betting he’d have done it for twenty more if he had to.

That was the type of man he was and I did trust him.

So I fought.

I yanked on the wire and I winced as it cut into my wrists. I twisted and turned, the sheet beneath me now wrapping around my legs as I struggled against the bonds, the fear creeping into me as the memory of being on the cot, Alfonzo on top of me, my wrists tied just like this but with the heavy cold weight of manacles.

Panic heightened as the memory grew stronger and I thrashed on the bed. Kai sitting on the chair was forgotten as I struggled to get free.

I couldn’t get away.

Trapped.

He was going to leave me here for days.

No.

No.

I screamed as I yanked and pulled as the memories invaded like a black suffocating fog.

“No. No.”

With everything I had, I yanked on the wire.

The knot he’d tied in the wire released and my arms shot forward from the momentum as I sprung free.

I lay still for a second, breathing ragged, my wrists still tied together but free from the headboard.

Free.

A cool wave of relief poured over me as the panic washed away. I was heaving in breaths of air from my struggle, but the terror was gone. It was as if the sudden release had re-written the memory. I’d escaped. I’d escaped when for years I couldn’t.

“Yes.” Kai’s voice was a deep resonating sound that was like a blanket of warmth.

“You put a knot that would eventually release if I fought hard enough? You wanted me to break free?”

“Yes.”

“You wanted me to feel the fear and escape it myself.” It wasn’t a question because that was exactly what he wanted.

“You won’t always be able to break free, London. That’s reality. But if you can’t, know that I’ll always come for you. Don’t ever forget that. You need to know that.”

My breath left me as I stared at him, taking in what he said. “I do know.” I had no doubt Kai would walk through an inferno in order to get to me. God, he had. “But you’re not God, Kai. Even if you think you are.”

He raised his brows. “True. But I’m the closest you’ll ever get to the big man.” I smiled and he said, “Come here.”