Patchwork Paradise(48)

“Well, they’re dogs. They’re going to bark.” I rolled onto my stomach and looked at him. “You look better. Did you sleep okay?”

“I did.” He sank onto the floor beside me, in such a graceful way, it shouldn’t have been possible for a man his size. He took my hand in his and looked at me with those sincere brown eyes. “Thanks for that.”

“Aw, pssh,” I said, waving my free hand, feeling flustered. “Milo and I are buds, aren’t we? We have an understanding.” Milo scrunched up his face and gave a dopey smile. “See that? That’s either an ‘I just tooted’ or ‘I just tinkled’ smile. I’m learning.”

Thomas squeezed my fingers lightly. “You’re really good with him.”

“You didn’t see me nearly pass out over the diaper from hell.” Gently working my hand loose, I sat up too, with Milo in the bouncy chair between us. “What are you going to do about work?”

He sighed and ran his hand through his hair. Milo waved his fist at him, and Thomas gave him a pinkie finger, which Milo promptly gnawed on. “I called them yesterday. It’d take a while to apply for parental leave, but they agreed to let me work part-time for the next six months. They weren’t happy about it, especially since I took such a long time off a few months ago. I have a friend who runs a day care, but he only has one spot available a week. It’s not enough. I’ll have to look into some of the bigger childcare places. It’s not ideal, but ideal would be Milo having a normal mom and dad, wouldn’t it?”

“He does have a normal mom and dad, Thomas. It’ll take some time to work out the details, that’s all. And I bet my mom will be happy to watch him while you and I are at work.”

“I can’t expect that from her,” he said.

“You’re not. I’m positive she’ll want to. She loves Milo to bits already. She’s thrilled. She always knew she wouldn’t get any grandchildren from me.”

Thomas gave me an odd look. “You don’t want kids?”

I shrugged, not wanting to get into the subject of Sam and his allergy to kids and pets right then.

Thomas sighed. “I’ll ask your mom. But I insist on paying her.”

I lifted my hands. “That’ll be between the two of you.”

Milo kicked his arms and legs and started to complain a little. “He wants you to hold him,” I said.

Thomas raised an eyebrow at me. “How do you know that?”

I shrugged, almost said, Because that’s what I’d like right now, but kept my mouth shut. “Why don’t we go for a little walk in the garden?” I asked. “I bet Milo would like to see some birdies, wouldn’t you?”

Thomas unclasped the straps and awkwardly lifted Milo from the bouncy chair. “I don’t even know how to hold him,” he whispered, and I patted his back.

“You’ll get there.”

The house had the kind of deep, mature yard only found in these parts of the city. The reason why we had so much space was thanks to the hospital down the street. We had to put up with ambulances leaving at all hours of the day and night, but to be honest, I didn’t even hear them anymore. The yard was worth it regardless. A slice of heaven walled in by six-foot brick walls, with old oaks and big weeping willows, and flower patches I hadn’t bothered with the last two summers. Maybe I should. It was my slice of heaven, and I wanted to take care of it.

Milo stared at everything with big, blue eyes as the wind rustled the leaves around us.

“I’ll go get a blanket,” I told Thomas. “I’ll be right back.”

I ran inside, grabbed a throw from the couch, and hurried outside. Thomas was pointing at a little red robin, talking softly to his son.

Holy crap, he had a son. And they were going to live with me in Sam’s house. In my house. I’d been ready for a tiny step toward maybe having a relationship again. Was I ready to play family? Without the benefits?

He hadn’t heard me approach, so I took a moment to watch them together, this handsome man with a small baby on his arm. My heart hurt a little bit. Sam hadn’t been a father figure. And because children weren’t something Sam wanted, I’d automatically assumed I didn’t want any either.

But seeing Thomas there, blowing gentle bubbles on the palm of Milo’s hand, awakened something within me that burned hotter than any kind of desire I’d experienced before. Milo smiled wide, and Thomas laughed, wondrously. The problem wasn’t going to be having them here. The problem would be living with them and keeping my heart out of the equation.

“Here,” I said, carrying over the blanket. “I’ll put it down in the shade. I bet Milo would love to look at the leaves and the clouds.” I straightened the corners and rose.

Thomas grabbed my arm when I turned away. “Stay.”

“But you probably want some bonding time. I don’t need to—”

He ducked his head so he could look straight into my eyes. “Stay,” he murmured again. And who was I to say no to that?

As I was bringing the blanket out, I’d had this idyllic image in mind of the three of us lying on it, baby Milo giggling as we pointed out shapes in the clouds. In reality he started fussing after fifteen minutes, and for the next forty-five, Thomas and I took turns wandering around the garden. Apparently Milo wasn’t on board with my romantic notions but wanted to be carried around until our arms threatened to fall off.