One To Watch(9)

I don’t know where I am, Ray. I don’t know where we are.





TEXT MESSAGE TRANSCRIPT, OCTOBER 14:

BEA SCHUMACHER & MARIN MENDOZA


Marin [4:15pm]: So tonight, 7:30? I’ll bring wine, you order takeout?

Marin [4:16pm]: I’m kind of feeling that good bougie Thai place, the one with the crazy pad kee mao? But idk I could be talked into burgers. OOOH OR DONER

Bea [4:22pm]:?????

Marin [4:23pm]: IT’S MAIN SQUEEZE PREMIERE NIGHT BEA OR HAD YOU FORGOTTEN

Bea [4:26pm]: I … had forgotten

Marin [4:26pm]: Well great news we’re watching at your house so there’s no appropriate way for you to cancel.

Bea [4:27pm]: I’m gonna order vegan

Marin [4:28pm]: Ugh don’t be spiteful. See you soon!!





TWITTER THREAD FROM USER @OMBEA


@OMBea Hey there, OMBeauties! Totally forgot tonight was @MainSqueezeABS premiere night, but now my bestie and I are on my couch with tacos & tequila and we’re ready to live-tweet every plot twist! Join us?

@OMBea Is it just me, or do the people on this show keep getting more boring? Jayden is the whitest white man in history and every one of these girls is basically performance art of straight femininity.

@OMBea Like what would happen if one of these women wore PANTS? Or had SHORT HAIR? Would the world end?

@OMBea And obviously they could NEVER be above a size 4, Jayden’s poor sad penis would break beneath the crushing weight of an average-sized woman.

@OMBea My friend @MaybeMarin wants to know if we should drink every time one of the girls says she needs a man to complete her life. I say no bc we might get real real wasted, but what say you???

@OMBea WHO IS THIS GIRL TAYLOR AND WHY IS SHE SAYING ALL THESE FACTS ABOUT PERSONAL FINANCE MARRY HER JAYDEN

@OMBea (we’re doing the drinking game)

@OMBea Ok here’s another thing though. These women are supposed to be “real” but these bodies are not realistic AT ALL. Who actually LOOKS LIKE THIS?

@OMBea Before you come for me about that one plus-size girl who was on the show one time a) she was A LITERAL MODEL and b) she got eliminated the first night so don’t even

@OMBea And obviously I know, it’s just TV, it’s all staged and fake, but they bill it as reality! Here are real people, finding real love! Except you, all 95% of humans who look nothing like this.

@CisforCatie PREACH, BEA!!

@dcfan822828 you actually won’t find love tho so like …

@EmmaCsYou love this!!!!!!!! more please!!!!!! can you do a post about this????





TEXT MESSAGE TRANSCRIPT, OCTOBER 15:

BEA SCHUMACHER & MARIN MENDOZA


Marin [7:29am]: Uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

Marin [7:29am]: Are you awake

Marin [7:30am]: Probably not, right, okay

Marin [7:31am]: When you wake up … maybe look at Twitter

Bea [9:41am]: Oh god why, who’s canceled now

Marin [9:42am]: Bea.

Marin [9:42am]: After I left last night … you wrote a blog post?

Bea [9:43]: Well my laptop is currently upside down on top of a pile of lipsticks (?) on my kitchen counter (??), so … it’s possible?

Bea [9:43am]: Oh wait, yes, I definitely did

Bea [9:43am]: Wow I was really feeling my rage, huh????

Marin [9:44am]: Please just check your Twitter.





VIRAL ROUNDUP OF THE WEEK: 10/18


by Patrick Matz, mashable.com


We thought for sure the most shared content of the week would be an already-infamous video of a tabby cat being catapulted off a seesaw by an overexuberant toddler (if you haven’t seen it yet, do yourself a favor and click here), but a late-breaking surge of support has brought us a new champion: Plus-size blogger Bea Schumacher’s scorching critique of reality romance juggernaut Main Squeeze has now been shared more than a million times across Facebook, Twitter, Tumblr, and Instagram. We estimate the viral post has reached more than 15 million people, a staggering 3 million of whom have clicked “Like.” Read on for the rest of the week’s viral content, including a can’t-miss tweetstorm detailing the conspiracy theory you never knew you always needed about Hillary Clinton’s dogs.





“PACK YOUR THINGS AND GO”:

PLUS-SIZE BLOGGER ANNIHILATES MAIN SQUEEZE


by Danielle Kander, bubblegiggle.com


Plus-size blogger Bea Schumacher loves Main Squeeze—and she’s not alone! Who among us can resist watching one man or woman choose from 25 potential suitors, narrowing the field week by week until we’re left with one lucky winner for a fairy-tale proposal, a whirlwind engagement, and a low-key breakup six to eight weeks later?

But I don’t love the show’s total lack of diversity—and neither does Schumacher. Monday night, she went on her blog OMBea (if you’re not following her, you’re doing the internet wrong) to post an epic takedown. She addressed the show’s “appalling” lack of racial diversity, its “perplexing” erasure of queerness, and most of all, its “abject refusal to include any woman who wears above a size 4, despite the fact that two-thirds of American women are size 14 and above.”

“Main Squeeze is the most successful romance reality show in history,” Schumacher wrote. “It defines what it means for ‘real’ people to find love—except according to its own standards, fat people aren’t real. We aren’t worthy. We don’t even exist.”