One Summer in Paris(105)

“I always thought she’d say no. She knows the dangers.”

“Never underestimate peer pressure.” Audrey thought about all the times she’d pretended to drink alcohol, and the one time she had drunk alcohol. She sympathized with Sophie.

David still had his arm around Grace. “Audrey is right. This is all going to be okay, Grace, I promise. We’ll figure it out together. And maybe it means she won’t be so easily pressured when she gets to college.”

There was a calmness about him that was contagious. Although David had behaved like a total shit, Audrey could see why Grace loved him.

He had kind eyes and solid shoulders.

She couldn’t imagine him freaking out about anything.

She shrugged. “Bad choices are part of life, aren’t they? Doesn’t mean your next choice can’t be a good one.”

Grace sniffed. “You’re right. I’ll see you tomorrow.” She pulled away from David and hugged Audrey.

Audrey hugged her back tightly. She didn’t want to let go.

This was probably the last time they’d see each other. She didn’t have Grace’s address, and she didn’t have the money to travel to the US. She felt as if part of her was being wrenched away.

She thought about Grace stepping in and saving her job. Grace teaching her French. Grace rescuing her when she was drunk. Grace listening while she talked about her mother for the first time in her life.

Trying not to cry, she pulled away. “Take care.”

She wanted to tell her what a difference she’d made to her life, how she felt as if Grace had actually saved her, but she couldn’t say any of that without revealing that something was wrong, so she said nothing else and within minutes Grace and David had left.

She flinched as the door closed.

The breath left her lungs in a whoosh.

So that was it, then.

Audrey stared after them for a moment and then picked up her backpack and made her way to Gare du Nord to get the Eurostar. It was hard to imagine she’d be back in London in a few hours. Her old life had felt like a million miles away, but now it was getting closer again.

She called Ron again, but his phone went to voice mail.

She had no idea how her mother was.

At the station, she bought a ticket and sat down to wait for the next train. Etienne called twice but she didn’t take his call. She didn’t want to dump more crap on him and she didn’t trust herself to say “I’m fine” convincingly.

She was on her own with this.

She blinked. She’d been on her own with things her whole life, so why did this suddenly feel different?

She twisted the ring on her finger and thought of Grace.

She thought of the conversations they’d had, the long hours they’d spent in the bookshop. Remembering Grace acting out French words should have made her laugh, but instead it made her want to cry.

She’d never felt lonelier in her life.

Having friends and losing them was worse than not having them in the first place. But she still didn’t wish for anything different. These last few weeks with Grace and Etienne had been the happiest of her life.

She’d had someone to share her thoughts and problems with and it had somehow made them easier to handle.

She’d had friends she trusted. Friends who knew the truth.

She should have taken more photographs so that she would always have the memory.

Crap. She rubbed her face with her fingers and glared at a man who was looking at her with concern.

She was a survivor. She’d get through this. So it was harder than usual. So what?

She was tough. Bring it on.

To distract herself, she put her headphones on and listened to an audiobook, but it made her think of Grace and Etienne so she took it off and stared into space instead.

Finally, they boarded the train and she elbowed her way to a seat by the window and slumped there.

Two minutes before the train doors closed someone sat down next to her. Audrey kept her face averted. The last thing she wanted was to make polite conversation with some stranger.

“We don’t do this, do we?” The woman spoke, and Audrey whirled around and there was Grace, sitting in the seat next to her.

“What are you talking about? What are you doing here?”

“We don’t say ‘I’m fine’ when we’re not fine. Not to each other. We have a proper friendship. The sort where you don’t have to say you’re fine when you’re not. What’s happened, Audrey? Why are you on this train?”

Audrey was swamped by emotion and also panic.

“Shit, Grace, the train leaves in, like, thirty seconds! You need to get off or you’ll be in London next and you have to be in Rome with Sophie.”

“You could have said, ‘Grace, the train leaves in thirty seconds.’ The swearing didn’t add anything to that sentence.”

Audrey felt a rush of frustration. “Don’t you get it? You’re going to be trapped on here.”

“Did I ever teach you the French word for train? I hope you bought your ticket in French.”

The doors closed, sealing them inside and Audrey sagged against her seat.

“Well, now you’re doomed. You’re going on a trip to London where, by the way, it is raining. How did you know I was here anyway?”

“I knew there was something wrong, but I was so wrapped up in my own problems it took me a few minutes to work it out. I was halfway to the airport when I thought to ring Elodie and sure enough she told me you’d called her and explained you had to go home because there was a family emergency. She was worried about you. What’s the emergency, honey?” Her voice was gentle. “Did something happen to your mom?”