Naked Love(65)

“We should go. Sydney will be there soon.”

His gaze slips from mine. It’s like we’re a sinking ship, but there’s no hole or crack to fix. We just carry too much baggage to stay afloat—or maybe it’s just that we have nowhere to go but down.

Jake finds a bag for Megan’s dinner, and we make our way to the truck in silence, drive to the clinic in silence, sink in silence.

I climb out and stare at the dim light coming from the front window of the clinic. Jake steps in front of me and sets the paper bag on the ground by our feet. My gaze sticks to the bag because I can’t look into his blue eyes. I can’t watch the night’s shadows dance across his handsome face. I just can’t …

His fingertips feather along the inside of my palms, touching me deeper than should be possible. “What if I can’t let go?”





CHAPTER NINETEEN




Jake


“Jake …” Avery bites her quivering lower lip.

Instant regret hammers my chest. Why did I say that? Before I say more or attempt to erase the words I just said, an SUV pulls into the parking spot next to my truck.

“My sister…” Avery jogs away, hugging the brunette that gets out of the vehicle.

They embrace as if they haven’t seen each other in years. I feel like the idiot stranger waiting for an introduction. Hi, I’m Jake. I’m the reason you’re here instead of home with your family and healthy dog.

“I’m so sorry.” Avery chokes on her words. “I shouldn’t have left L.A. with him.”

Sydney pulls back, pressing her palms to Avery’s cheeks. “Stop. This isn’t your fault.”

Avery releases a tiny sob.

“Let’s go inside.”

Avery nods. “Oh … um … this is Jake.”

I hold out my hand.

Sydney takes my hand, offering a forced smile shackled with worry. “Nice to meet you.”

I nod toward the door. “You too. Let’s see how he’s doing.”

Avery loops her arm around Sydney’s arm. I’m not sure who’s supporting whom. I hold open the door, and Avery gives me a sad smile.

Megan shuffles into the waiting room with a cup of coffee in her hand. We make quick introductions, and I wait here while Sydney and Avery go back to see Swarley. A few minutes later, Megan reappears.

I hand her the bag of food. “Is he going to be fine? Don’t sugarcoat it with me. There’s no need. We’ve been through too much together.”

Megan eases into a chair. “I don’t know yet. It’s hard to say. The surgery went well, but he’s an older dog. Too many uncontrollable things could still happen.”

I sit next to her, blowing out a slow breath.

“Quite the sigh. Is it about Swarley or Avery?” She opens the container and gives me a wry smile.

“Hell if I know.” I run my hands though my hair and bend forward, resting my elbows on my knees.

“Sounds complicated.”

“It wasn’t supposed to be. It was a favor for Deedy. An inconvenience. Avery was a nightmare. High maintenance. Whiny …”

“You’re in love.” Megan taps the fork on her lower lip.

“You’re crazy.”

“I saw you with her earlier. The tender side of Jake Matthews. The way you looked at her. Really, the way you couldn’t stop looking at her. Steve used to look at me like that.”

“She’s …” I rest my forehead in my palms.

“Beautiful? Sexy? Blond? Just like you?” She nudges her arm into mine.

“She’s nothing like me. She’s nothing I thought I’d ever like. Avery’s …” I blow out another sigh, shaking my head. “She’s stereotypical and completely blindsiding at the same time. It’s messing with my head. She’s Francine one minute and my mom the next minute. I don’t know if I should embrace her vulnerability or run from her vanity.”

Megan grunts. “Jake Matthews, that’s your problem. You see her in this black and white … two-dimensional way, and that’s not fair to her. You don’t need to embrace her vulnerability, you need to feed her spirit. And don’t run from her vanity, simply admire her beauty in all its perfect and flawed states. Love her as a whole, not just the parts you find worthy of love.”

“The hell, Meg … what happened to my bitter friend who threatened to cut off her cheating husband’s junk? When did you channel your inner Gandhi?”

She chuckles. “I had my sink-or-swim moment. Drown under the weight of my anger and hatred or let it go to save myself—to free myself. I let it go.”

I nod several times as her words hang in the air. “I saw my father—very unexpectedly—at a stop in New Mexico. Francine too. I’m not sure I would know how to coexist with him in a world where I don’t hate him.”

“Why?”

I shrug, massaging my temples. “It’s just always been my way of coping with my mom’s death.”

Megan rests her hand on my leg. I wait for more of her voice of reason, but she remains silent. Sometimes no words are the best words.

*

Avery

“He’s been with me through the most defining moments of my adult life,” Sydney speaks after fifteen minutes of nothing but tears and soft whimpers while stroking Swarley’s head.