NOCTE (Nocte Trilogy #1)(34)

“You’re taking your meds, right?”

He seems to hesitate before he answers. “Yeah.”

I raise an eyebrow. “Yeah?”

He nods.

“Do I need to take you to Group today?”

He hesitates again. “Maybe. I’m going to lie down for a while though. I might go to the afternoon session.”

“Ok.” I desperately try to hide my concern, because I know he doesn’t want me to hover. He wants to find his autonomy, not become even more tethered to me. It hurts. A lot. But he doesn’t need to know that. “Just yell at me when you’re ready.”

He nods and heads toward the house, pausing when he hits the edge of the trail. I worry because he’s starting to stay secluded in his room. A lot.

His shoulders are so skinny as he calls back to me.

“Calla?”

“Yeah?”

He smiles a watery smile. “Did you know that Queen Victoria loved Albert so much that she insisted on being buried in his dressing robe, holding a plaster cast of his hand?”

I shake my head, rolling my eyes. “You’re so weird and random, bro.”

He grins like everything is fine, like he’s back to normal. “I know.”

Then he disappears down the trail.

I sit back down in the reddish dirt, trailing my finger through it. Before I know it, I’ve written Dare’s name, with a flourish at the end of the e. A flourish shaped like a heart.

“A penny for your thoughts?”

Dare’s wry voice comes from behind me and I cringe because apparently the trail leading to these cliffs is Grand Central Station today. And I’m humiliated because obviously I’m thinking of him. I flush, the heat spreading from my chest to my face, and I don’t want to turn around.

But I do.

Dare’s handsome face is amused and a teench arrogant. He’s dressed in jogging clothes, although he’s not sweaty, so he hasn’t run far yet.

“My thoughts are more expensive than that,” I announce. He grins even wider.

“I’m sure. We still have that little matter of secrets to discuss, by the way.”

This confuses me. “Secrets?”

His eyes meet mine, gleaming ebony. “Yeah. Everyone’s got ‘em, remember?”

Oh, yeah. That’s exactly what he said when we first met. “Maybe. But not me.”

Dare rolls his eyes. “Somehow I doubt that. You had Nocte hidden up your sleeve, remember?”

I smile at that. “Yeah. And we didn’t stay long enough to see it all.”

“Another time,” Dare answers quickly. I nod.

“Definitely.” He doesn’t seem excited though, and that bothers me. He seemed excited last night. He’s an enigma, a contradiction. His emotions change by the day. Today, he’s cool and detached. He’s almost reserved or hesitant. It’s so strange.

“I’ll catch you later, Calla,” he says quietly, before bolting off in a long-strided jog.

That’s when my heart almost stops, because his strides are so long, he’s in perilous territory within two steps.

“Stop!” I scream out, my voice splitting the sky like a knife. Dare freezes, turning to look at me in confusion, his eyes wide.

I’m on my feet now, my heart pounding in my throat.

“Carefully step back this way,” I tell him. “Now.”

Realization washes over his face as tiny balls of gravel and dirt begin to give way around his feet. He quickly lunges toward me, diving at the ground right before a huge hunk of earth breaks free, falling over a hundred feet to land in the ocean below.

Dare is in a heap at my feet, and my heart pounds as I stare down at him.

“You can’t stand that close to the edge,” I utter needlessly, my throat still hot and tight.

He looks over his shoulder at the ledge, then takes in the small yellow warning sign to our right. It’s a sign that should be larger and red, bright red, bright enough for someone to notice.

He looks at me, then shakes his head. “I should’ve known better.”

I nod. “There’s no way you could’ve known. The ledge is really thin. It won’t hold weight. I should’ve told you when you first came, but I didn’t think about it.”

Because I’m not used to having anyone but my family staying up here.

Because he flustered me with his Live Free tattoo and his contradictions.

He smiles, a slow smile, but not a genuine one. This one is forced, fake. It’s his go-to smile, which means that we all have fake go-to smiles. All the world is a stage and we all smile falsely upon it.

“Well, I’d say you made up for it by saving my life.”

Honestly, though, he doesn’t sound happy about that. His eyes are so sad, so closed now, so glittery.

Aren’t you happy to be alive?

I want to ask it. I’m so tempted, too tempted. He’s got everything that most people want. Good looks, wit, charm. And he doesn’t seem happy with it. Is it because he’s an orphan now?

“Why do you seem so sad?” I blurt out, unable to stop myself.

Dare stares at me, studying me, considering my words. He raises an eyebrow.

“Official question?”

I nod, silently. Yes. Official question.