My Dark Romeo: An Enemies-to-Lovers Romance(31)
That’s a definite no.
Romeo Costa
A gentleman doesn’t kiss and tell.
Ollie vB
Asshole, please.
Drop the gentleman charade.
I’ve met dildos more honorable than you.
Zach Sun
@OllievB, you’ve met dildos?
Socially or intimately?
Or both?
Romeo Costa
I cannot believe nearly two decades of education in America’s finest establishments bred me you two as best friends.
Ollie vB
I’ll have you know I’m a fucking delight and a top-notch friend.
And I’m happy to prove it.
Shall I break her in for you?
Romeo Costa
Joke about it one more time, and I’ll personally cut off your dick and feed it to you, bite by bite, until you choke on it.
Zach Sun
Hissy fit #2 duly recorded and entered into the meeting’s minutes.
The woman turned you into an ape.
Ollie vB
…
Is that a no?
The warning signs flashed bright and loud, daring me to heed them.
As it happened, I was so content watching my bride’s golden blush, tantalizing neck, full breasts, and macabre beauty, I lowered my guard.
She looked delectable, even in her stained nightgown. So painfully young and innocent and alive. Fondling her breasts felt like pouring ink all over freshly fallen snow.
Like the perfect sin.
Corrupting the uncorrupted.
The prenuptial agreement passed without a hitch. Shortbread scoured through every word, jotted her name on the dotted lines a dozen times, and listened, nodding whenever appropriate.
It marked the first time she’d exhibited signs of rationality.
That should’ve been my first warning.
Her feistiness returned in full swing when our lawyers departed and Cara arrived to drop off a trillion new outfits.
Shortbread soaked up an eyeful of fifty-seven-year-old, wedding-band-sporting Cara. Her shoulders sagged.
My bride had the poker face of an eager puppy.
“These clothes are an insult to eyes all over the world. It’s going to look like I’m playing dress up as a sixty-year-old.” Dallas flung cashmere dresses and hand-knitted cardigans on the hardwood while picking an outfit for dinner.
My body temperature spiked. I positively despised messes, and everything about her was untidy.
Cara hovered around Dallas, thrusting different garments at her. Hettie joined the party, cracking up each time Dallas tested Cara’s patience.
I suspected they’d become fast friends in the time I’d spent in my Woodley Park penthouse. I didn’t mind. It was good that Shortbread had someone to talk to.
Because that person wouldn’t be me.
Nonetheless, I wasn’t thrilled to have a front-row seat to this tableau.
Cara picked up a plaid sweater. “What’s wrong with this dress?”
Dallas blew a raspberry like a toddler, just to get on my nerves. “I’ll look like I’m about to launch into a monologue about how I haven’t seen my lover in eighty-four years.”
Hettie, who’d gotten the Titanic reference, toppled to the floor, clutching her stomach with each laugh.
A flustered Cara planted a fist on each hip. “This is the sixteenth gown you’ve tried, young lady. It is a terrific gown. A classic. Costs a fortune. I didn’t hear any complaints when Romeo bought it for his ex-girlf—”
She didn’t finish the sentence, but it was enough to paint disgust on Shortbread’s face.
“Well, in that case, he is welcome to marry her.”
No, thank you.
I’d take Dallas over Morgan every day of my cursed week.
After forty minutes of this spectacle, I snatched a dress from Dallas’s fingertips. “If you’re not going to choose an outfit, I’ll do it for you. Dare I suspect our tastes run different?”
A violent glare swaddled her cheeks. “I want to be left alone. Everybody out.”
With pleasure.
I waited in the foyer, glued to my messages.
Ollie vB
That couch needed a makeover, anyway.
Zach Sun
Hate to break it to you, but you married the female, virginal version of Oliver.
Romeo Costa
Zach, sweetheart, you sure you’re doing lines of code and not lines of coke?
Beside me, Hettie whistled. “Holy. Crap.”
I pocketed my phone, lifting my head. Shortbread descended the stairway, reminding me why I’d stolen her.
For the first time in my life, I regretted my no-sex rule.
I imagined seeing this inexperienced, na?ve woman writhing beneath me as I took her virginity would make my entire decade, if not lifetime.