Meet Me Halfway(89)

No, I was panicking because of the level of love I felt for this man. I wanted to give him my heart, bruised and battered as it was, and the thought of giving the last remaining piece away without the guarantee it would be safe was terrifying.

I wasn’t sure if I was brave enough to risk it. So, I burrowed closer to him, desperate to enjoy the last dregs of euphoria, basking in the feel of his hands running up and down my skin.

In case it was the only time it happened.





Chapter Twenty-Five





Whoever first decided alarm clocks needed to be decked out with mini foghorns was the devil. The sound was sharp and loud in my ear. I stirred, grumbling and squeezing my eyes shut.

Wait.

My alarm was set to the radio, not ear-splitting beeps. I shot up, eyes punching open to dart about a room that wasn’t mine. I was at Garrett’s. I’d fallen asleep at Garrett’s. Oh fuck. Oh fuck, oh fuck, oh fuck.

Fingers brushed down the length of my spine, “Calm down, baby, it’s fine. I set the alarm for five, you’re not late.”

Getting to work on time was vitally important, but not at all what was on my mind. I needed to get home before Jamie woke up and noticed I was gone. I needed to shower, and chug an entire pot of coffee, and get my shit together, and oh my fucking God.

The groan I emitted was loud and positively indecent. Garrett’s hands had come to rest on my shoulders, and he was kneading them in a way that might have been more pleasurable than his touches from the night before. Okay, that wasn’t true, but holy magic fingers.

“You’re so tense, Maddie. It’ll be all right, it’s not like you live far. We can go over there as soon as you’re ready.”

He was right, I knew he was right, but the thought of Jamie finding out I’d stayed here prevented me from relaxing. Garrett’s thumbs slid down to massage my lower back, and that had me straightening to a rod. I was naked. I was butt ass naked.

Un-pretzel-ing myself from him, I leapt off the bed, crossing my arms over my chest as my head whipped left to right, searching for my clothes.

“Maddie.”

I ignored him. Ignored his cute nickname and sexy morning hair. If I looked at him, I’d melt like I always did, and I’d never get out the door. In the span of one night, I’d had unprotected sex and slept at a man’s house—regardless of how close it was—and didn’t think twice about setting an alarm, myself. Not only could I have been late to work, but I would’ve left Layla to handle getting Jamie to school.

Finding my shirt, I snatched it up, roughly shoving my head through. This was why I didn’t date. I needed structure, I needed boundaries and rules. I wasn’t sixteen anymore, I couldn’t be this irresponsible.

“Maddie, look at me.”

“I can’t, I need to go. I need to shower and get ready and get Jamie to school.”

“I’ll help you, just slow down.”

He lowered his long legs to the floor, and I twisted farther away, refusing to allow myself to indulge in his deliciously naked form. “I don’t need help; I just need to find my damn pants.”

A heavy sigh sounded behind me. “Maybe I’m wrong, but that sounds like you could use a little help then.”

“No, I don’t,” I snapped. I cringed, hating myself for taking out my anxiety on him. It wasn’t his fault I was here. I’d walked over on two very willing legs. But I had a tendency to get angry as a defense mechanism when I was emotional.

“You’re overreacting a little bit, don’t you think?”

I didn’t reply, finally spotting my underwear and pants near the door and charging for them. How did I explain that this scenario was exactly what I’d feared? That this was one of the reasons I’d tried to hold him at a distance?

I’d spent my entire life giving up things for other people, and the thought of depending on someone, of falling in so deep that I forgot about my responsibilities, scared me.

I yanked my pants up, already aiming for the door when a hand wrapped around my bicep.

“Goddammit, Maddie, wait a minute. Let me get dressed, and I’ll help you.”

I turned to him, blinking back my shame and the burning in my eyes. “I don’t need your help; I just need to go home.”

He’d only had a chance to slip on boxers, and he was standing there staring at me with a look of determination. But underneath, I sensed a sliver of disappointment, and my heart twisted.

“I know you don’t. You could take over the world without a lick of help, and I’d watch from the sidelines, rooting you on, but that doesn’t mean you don’t deserve it. You’re making excuses so you can tuck yourself back into your shell. Don’t do that, don’t act like last night didn’t happen.”

A tear slipped free, and I dashed it away angrily. I hated that I cried when I was overwhelmed. “Last night did happen, and it was amazing, Garrett. But I can’t be the type of person to have an unplanned sleepover without even thinking about the child I have to get to school in the morning.”

I swiped another tear away as they fell faster, forcing myself to maintain eye contact even though it was killing me. “I can’t do this; I can’t be the person who puts a man and a relationship before myself or my kid again. Especially when you have so many reasons to walk away.”