Maybe Someday(43)

that says he didn’t enjoy whatever just went

down his throat.

“What the hell?” Maggie says, scrunching up

her face and wiping her mouth.

Sydney runs into the kitchen with her hand

over her mouth. She’s shaking her head, trying

not to laugh, but she looks apologetic at the same

time. “I’m sorry,” she keeps saying over and

over.

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What the hell just happened?

Warren composes himself, then turns to

Sydney. He speaks and signs at the same time,

which I appreciate. He can’t know how isolating

it feels when you’re in a group of people who

hear, but no matter what, he always signs when

I’m in the room with him. “Did we actually just

almost drink an entire shot of Pine-Sol?”

He’s eyeing Sydney hard. She answers him,

and he signs her response for my benefit. She

says, “You two weren’t supposed to drink it. It

was supposed to be Ridge. And no, I didn’t actu-

ally put Pine-Sol in there, idiot. I’m not trying to

kill the guy. It was apple juice and vinegar.”

She tried to prank me.

And she failed.

I start laughing and text her.

Me: Nice try. That was a valiant effort, al-

though it backfired.

She flips me off.

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I look at Maggie; luckily, she’s laughing about

it. “There is no way I could live here,” she says.

She walks to the refrigerator and pulls out the

milk, then makes herself and Warren a quick

drink to wash away the aftertaste.

“Let’s go,” Warren says after he downs the

milk and tosses his cup into the sink. “Ridge is

driving cuz I won’t be able to walk in three

hours.”

Chapter Nine

Sydney

I have no idea where we’re going, but I’m doing

my best to appear engaged. I’m in the backseat

with Warren, and he’s talking to me about the

band, explaining his involvement in it. I ask the

appropriate questions and nod at the appropriate

moments, but my mind isn’t here at all.

I know I can’t expect the hurt and heartache to

go away this quickly, but today has been the

worst day so far since my actual birthday. I real-

ize that all the pain I’ve been feeling hasn’t been

quite as bad because I’ve had Ridge this week. I

don’t know if it’s the way he brings comedic re-

lief when he’s around or if it’s because I really

was developing a crush on him, but the times I’ve

spent with him were the only times I felt

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remotely happy. They were the only times I

wasn’t thinking about what Hunter and Tori did

to me.

But now, watching him in the front seat with

his hand clasping Maggie’s . . . I don’t like it. I

don’t like how his thumb occasionally sweeps

back and forth. I don’t like the way she looks at

him. I especially don’t like the way he looks at

her. I didn’t like how he slipped his fingers

through hers when we reached the bottom of the

apartment stairs. I didn’t like how he opened her

door, then placed his hand on her lower back

while she climbed inside the car. I didn’t like

how they had a silent conversation while he was

putting the car in reverse. I didn’t like how he

laughed at whatever she said and then pulled her

to him so he could kiss her forehead. I don’t like

how all of these things make me feel as though

the only good moments I’ve had since last week

are now over.

Nothing has changed. Nothing significant

happened between the two of us, and I know

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we’ll continue with the way things have been.

We’ll still write lyrics together. He might still

listen to me sing. We’ll still continue to interact

the way we’ve done since I met him, so this situ-

ation shouldn’t be bothering me.

I know in my heart that I didn’t want anything

to happen with him, especially at this point in my

life. I know I need to be on my own. I want to be on my own. But I also know that the reason I’m

feeling so conflicted by this entire situation is

that I did have a little hope. Although I wasn’t

ready for anything right now, I thought the pos-

sibility would be there. I assumed that maybe

someday, when I was ready, things could have

developed between us.

However, now that Maggie is in the picture, I

realize there can’t be a maybe someday between us. There will never be a maybe someday. He

loves her, and she obviously loves him, and I

can’t blame them, because whatever they have is

beautiful. The way they look at each other and in-

teract and obviously care about each other is

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