Masters at Arms (Rescue Me Saga, #0.5)(13)

“What the f…heck are you doing out here?”

Her teeth chattered as she tried to answer. He took off his jacket and put it on her to give her another layer of warmth, then wrapped his arm around her, hoping to infuse some heat into her thin body. “Let’s get you back home.”

“N-n-no, Adam. I have to tell you something.”

Adam just pulled her along toward the house. “We’ll talk when we get you out of this squall.” She tried to dig in her heels, but he’d have none of it. Damned fool kid needed a caretaker.

He’d been dreading going back into the chaos at her house, but now he just wanted to get her inside as quickly as possible. She’d catch pneumonia out here. They got as far as her front door when Karla wedged her toe against the door and turned to look up at him.

“Wait! Adam, there’s something you need to know, and I can’t say this inside the house.”

Adam tried to block as much of the wind from hitting her shivering frame as he could, but her black-and-pink hair lashed across her face. He reached out and tucked the wild strands behind her left ear because they distracted him from the conversation that seemed so important to her. What in the hell could she possibly have to say that couldn’t be said inside?

Karla splayed her gloved hand on his chest, over his wounded heart, and looked up at him with those big sparkling blue eyes surrounded by that god-awful makeup and pink hair. She searched his eyes for a long moment, he didn’t know for what.

Then he felt a niggling at the scar on the back of his neck—always a sign he wasn’t going to want to deal with whatever was incoming. Fuck. He hoped she wasn’t about to say what he thought she was getting ready to lay on him.

“Adam, I n-n-n-know you have a wife and y-y-y-you think I’m just a kid, but I want to t-t-tell you that…I l-l-love you.”

Double f*cking damn. He’d need a minesweeper to navigate these waters. Joni, where are you when I need you? She’d know how to deal with a sixteen-year-old’s crush. She’d been surrounded by teenage girls at the Catholic school where she’d taught until last spring. Help me out here, baby.

“Hon, I love you, too.” Crap. That didn’t come out sounding right, but surely she’d know what he meant.

When her eyes lit up and she pursed her lips as if expecting him to kiss her, he turned his rudder hard to starboard. She’d definitely taken his words the wrong way.

“Like a father, Karla. Hell, I’m old enough to be your father.”

When tears welled up in her eyes and spilled down her cheeks, his gut turned to mush. He always came undone when a woman cried. But, hell, Karla was just a kid. Why did her tears rip him apart even more? How in the hell had he let this happen?

Now, wait a minute there. He’d never given her any indication he wanted to be anything other than a guardian to keep her out of trouble. Fuck, he didn’t know anything about teenage girls.

“Look, hon…” Quit calling her hon, you frigging *. “Look, Karla, I’m an old man. Your life is just starting. I’m sure there are lots of boys who’d—”

“But they’re so immature. All they talk about is sports. I don’t have anything in common with them.”

What the hell did she have in common with an old worn-out Marine? God, he wished they made tactical maps for situations like these. He was f*cking clueless how to fend off this attack.

“Nothing wrong with sports.” Oh, that’s profound, jarhead. Damn. He liked this kid a lot. Didn’t want to hurt her for anything. But he wasn’t a perv.

Just tell it like it is, man. You’ve never had any problem doing that before. What’s different this time?

She’s a kid! And a girl! I don’t want to hurt her.

“Look, Karla. I like you a lot, but I don’t feel that way about you.” When the light left her eyes, he felt like a f*cking heel. While he knew the words needed to be said, if it were physically possible, he’d have given himself a good roundhouse kick in the ass for whatever the hell he’d done to make her think he’d welcome this heartfelt declaration. How could he make it not seem like a rejection because there was something wrong with her? She’d make a fine girlfriend and wife for some guy someday. Just not him.

“I still love my wife.” Yeah, that’s good. Let Joni pull your prick out of the fire. He didn’t have to tell her his wife was dead. Besides, he did still love Joni. “You have some growing up to do. I’m sure you’ll meet someone one day who can love and respect you the way you should be loved.”

Karla tore herself away, opened the door, and ran inside.

He laid his forehead against the cold doorframe. What a f*cking mess he’d made of that. Maybe it was a good thing he and Joni hadn’t had kids. He’d make a lousy father.

That f*cking bus couldn’t get here soon enough.

*

Karla tried to eat all the food on her plate, but the lump in her throat, and Adam sitting across the table from her, made that impossible.

“Good news, Adam,” Daddy said, beaming. “I’ve managed to get you a ticket on a red-eye flight out tomorrow night. Direct to San Diego. You’ll be back on base in hours rather than days.”

Karla saw the stricken look on Adam’s face. He must be horrified to think of being stuck with her another whole day. Her eyes brimmed with tears and she hung her head down, hoping they’d fall right into her burgundy cloth napkin without leaving an embarrassing trail.