Mafiosa (Blood for Blood #3)(78)

‘We’ll be happy in the new year,’ Millie said, the promise of it shimmering in her eyes. ‘Just hang in there a little longer and then we’ll get out of Chicago.’

‘Yes.’ The word was thick in my throat. ‘Of course we will.’

‘I got you this.’ She reached inside her coat and pulled out a present. ‘I hope you like it.’

I reached under the bed and fished her present out, too. ‘It’s not much,’ I said sheepishly, handing it over. It was just a scarf and gloves, and some funny socks. She deserved better. ‘I’m pretty broke and I’ve been confined to online shopping ever since Valentino passed away.’

Millie ripped open her present and buried her head in the scarf. ‘I love it,’ she whooped, wrapping it around her twice and then taking the gloves to try them on. ‘These are beautiful. I hope you didn’t overspend.’

I snorted. ‘I appreciate the overenthusiasm.’

She swatted a glove at me. ‘Open your gift.’

I opened the purple wrapping paper and a small Mason jar tumbled out. It had a purple cloth lid, and a heart hanging off the twine that encircled it.

‘It’s not honey,’ she said quickly. ‘Don’t freak out.’

I picked it up and read the heart aloud. ‘The Happy Jar,’ I said, glancing at her. ‘To be used when you are feeling sad or when you are experiencing Millie withdrawal symptoms.’

I shook it. There were loads of tiny folded-up pieces of paper inside.

‘They’re memories, mostly,’ said Millie. ‘But some are our dreams for the future. And other ones are just compliments that will cheer you up. Like “You have the hair of a fairytale mermaid princess.” Stuff like that.’

I opened the lid, and shook one piece on to my hand.

‘Just one!’ she said, snatching the jar from me and closing it again. ‘You can’t read them all at once. They’re supposed to last for a little while at least.’

Duly scolded, I unfolded the paper and read the memory scribbled across it.

‘Remember that time we snuck into an R-rated movie and when we got caught you told the usher we were twenty-seven because you thought overcompensating would throw him off? He kicked us out and you threatened to sue him for age discrimination.’

I started giggling. ‘I had forgotten about that.’

Millie was laughing too. ‘You were so indignant, I almost believed you myself!’

‘Can I read one more?’ I asked hopefully.

‘Are you feeling sad?’

‘A little,’ I admitted.

She handed the jar to me and I unfurled another piece of paper.

‘When my dad told us we were moving to Chicago I cried for six nights straight. If I had known you were waiting somewhere on the other end for me, I would have leapt on to the plane and never looked back. I thank the universe every day for giving me a friend as good and loyal and kind as you.’

‘Oh,’ I said, wiping a rogue tear. ‘That’s so lovely. And now I’m crying.’ I dived at her, wrapping her in a big hug that pushed us both backwards on the bed. ‘Thank you,’ I said, squeezing her tight. ‘Thank you so much, Mil. I love it! It’s so wonderful and thoughtful and perfect.’

‘You’re welcome.’ She blew her hair out of her face. ‘Sheesh, anyone would think you’d never got a gift before.’

‘None like this.’ I sat up and placed the Mason jar on my bedside table, smiling at all the loveliness inside it. All those tiny bright sparks for me. I would read them all tonight, just in case.

‘It’s about hope,’ Millie said. ‘It’s about happiness. It won’t always be like this,’ she said quietly. ‘I just wanted you to remember that.’

I couldn’t look at her face any more. I was sitting beside my best friend and I was lying to her. Even by not saying anything, I was misleading her. ‘Thank you.’ I knitted my hands together, studying my fingernails. Tomorrow, one way or another, there would be blood on them.

She grabbed my hand, covering it with hers. ‘We’ll always have each other, Soph. And that’s the most important thing of all.’ Her smile held the promises of tomorrow.

‘You’re so sappy, Mil.’ I pulled her in for another hug, keenly aware that it might be the last one I ever gave her. I was determined to make it count.

‘Oh, you love it.’ She hugged me back just as strongly, until my breath came out in laboured wheezes.

‘I know,’ I huffed, blinking back the tears.





CHAPTER THIRTY-SEVEN


STARLESS NIGHT




Christmas Eve passed mostly in silence. Gino made a snowman in the back garden and Dom kicked its head off before he could stick a carrot on for the nose. They ended up brawling on the ground, making an impressive, if inadvertent, pair of snow angels. Elena watched them from the window, a sad smile painted across her face.

CJ came along and demolished the rest of the snowman, and Dom chased him all the way to the barn before wrangling him into a headlock and smashing a snowball into his hair. Gino rolled to his feet and started rebuilding his snowman. Nic went outside with a carrot and helped him. I watched from the window, drinking hot chocolate and feeling a pinch of sympathy for Gino. Like Luca, he didn’t belong here either, but he was too blissfully unaware to see it. At least, I hoped he was.