Mack Daddy(49)

I finally answered him, “You’ve been on my mind, too. A lot.”

Mack was dressed to the nines in a fitted, collared shirt and formal trousers.

Looking him up and down, I said, “You’re so dressed up.”

“I have a surprise for you. But you need to stop at home and change into something nice.”

“You’re taking me to my condo?”

He sensed my apprehension. “Yes, but I’ll wait in the car for you.”

Once at my house and not wanting to waste time, I’d never gotten dressed so fast in my life. My pulse raced with excitement as I threw on a red dress and matching heels. Glancing over at a picture of Victor and me in our bedroom, I tried not to let the guilt seep in. I reminded myself that even Victor wanted me to use this time away to figure things out. Going out with Mack tonight was part of that process.

Mack’s eyes widened when I returned to the car. “Fuck, you look gorgeous. I’ve always loved you in red. It accentuates your hair.”

“Thank you.” My skin felt hot from the compliment. “So, you won’t tell me where we’re going?”

“Like I said, it’s a surprise.”

Twenty minutes later, we pulled up to the Hyatt Regency hotel that overlooked the Charles River.

“We’re going to The Spinnaker.” He smiled.

The Spinnaker was a restaurant situated on the top floor of the hotel. It was known for its rotating floor, which spun around ever so slowly while patrons gazed out at different views of the city. Back in college, we’d gone there once to celebrate acing our respective final exams. Mack had racked up a huge bill on his father’s credit card and vowed to deal with the repercussions later. We’d had so much fun that night.

We made our way to the top of the hotel, only—to our shock—there was nothing there anymore. A cleaning person was vacuuming a rug, but the doors that once led into the famous restaurant were locked.

“What happened to The Spinnaker?” Mack asked.

“Closed down several years ago,” the woman said. “They just rent the space for private parties now.”

“I didn’t know,” I whispered to him.

“Thank you,” he told the worker before turning to me. “I feel so stupid.”

Placing my hand on his shoulder, I said, “It’s okay.”

“It’s not okay. It’s not.” He repeated, “None of this is okay. It’s like I just expected everything to be exactly the same.” I knew he was referring to more than just the restaurant being closed.

Mack was extremely quiet during the elevator ride back down to the lower level. Once outside of the hotel, instead of heading back toward the car, he stopped walking and stared out toward the river.

The wind caused by being so close to the water blew my hair around as I asked, “Mack, what’s wrong?”

He looked up at the sky then over at me. “Am I delusional?”

“What do you mean?”

“Be honest. Am I grasping for something that’s not there anymore?” He turned to me. “I wake up in the morning with hope, that every day I’m somehow closer to being with you. I still feel this bond between us. I feel it so strongly. But tonight is an example of how f*cking clueless I apparently am. I just assumed…it would be here, just like I assumed that I could just come back into your life and somehow win you back after eight f*cking years. The one chance I get to really be with you—this week—and my life gets in the way, once again demonstrating how I can never make you a priority like you deserve. Fuck, I don’t even think I would choose me if I were you.” He looked up at the sky then back at me. “I don’t have all the time in the world to give you. I couldn’t give you the perfect life even if I wanted to, because I am carrying so much baggage. Some days, I don’t even know who I am anymore…Jonah’s dad, Torrie’s ex, Michael Morrison’s estranged son. But when I’m with you…I’m Mack. I feel like myself. When you look at me, you remind me of who I am, who I want to be. I want to go back to being that man who was once happier than a pig in shit just from being around you every day. But it’s not fair to steal away even an ounce of your happiness just so I can have mine.”

As much as I’d wanted to avoid touching him, I couldn’t help it. I pulled him into a tight embrace.

We just held each other for the longest time. His breath was shaky. I could feel his heart pounding faster than I could ever remember. For the first time, it hit me how vulnerable Mack really was. Even though he always seemed so confident and strong, he was letting his guard down completely in this moment. I still had no clue what the right choice was for me, but one thing I was sure of: I wanted to spend every minute of tonight with this man. The evening wasn’t going to go to waste.

Breaking our long embrace, I asked, “Will you take me back to your house?”

He seemed surprised. “My house?”

“Yes. I want to cook for you and watch a movie on your big ass television. That’s how I want to spend tonight, not in some fancy restaurant.”

“But I’m supposed to be wining and dining you.”

“What would make me happiest is to be able to cook us a nice meal and to just be with you. Can we go to your place?”

“Of course. Consider my house your house. I would love that more than anything.”