Loving Mr. Daniels(36)

The room went silent. The words on the board even made me shiver, even though I’d already known the story.
Ryan was the first to speak when he said, “Burned by a teacher, Avery!”
The room started cracking up, and I couldn’t stop smiling. I wanted to be shocked that Daniel knew the exact story I’d spoke of, but of course he did. He was intelligent beyond measure.
Daniel held his hands up, bringing the roaring class to silence. “All right. Yes. So what I want from you is to take these papers you wrote for me at the beginning of the year about your goals in life—which I’ve given you all a few notes about”—he lifted a stack of paper and started handing them back to us—“and I want you to sum it up in three different ways. Next week as a sonnet. The week after as a haiku. And three weeks from now as a flash fiction story. At the end of each week, you’ll present your poetry in class. I won’t go Hemingway on you, giving you only six words for the flash fiction. You get ten.” He placed my paper on my desk and smiled at me. It was that same kind smile I’d taken in way back when at the train station. “Make each word count.”
When he handed Ryan his paper, Daniel paused. “This might be the best essay I’ve ever read, Ryan. Keep it up.” Ryan grinned and thanked Daniel.
The bell rang and everyone hurried out of the class. I didn’t understand why they were so quick to leave. This was my favorite class to slowly retreat from. Before standing from my desk, I noticed an extra piece of paper attached to my essay. Flipping it over, I read the words Daniel had written to me.
Brilliant. Simply brilliant.
You’re going to be an amazing author.
I’ll read whatever you write.
I miss you so much it’s hard to breathe.
When I looked up, I saw his eyes on me. He looked as if a weight had been lifted off his shoulders as our eyes connected. I felt the weight remove from my body, too. He was still there. Daniel wasn’t merely Mr. Daniels—he was still himself. And I was still on his mind, the same way he lived in mine.
Maybe there weren’t two different Daniels. Maybe Mr. Daniels was just another part of him. So it wasn’t surprising that I had fallen for both sides of the coin. I was crazy about all of him—the good, the bad, and the broken pieces.
I think I liked the broken pieces the most.
I didn’t even know what it meant for us—his note, my looking up to him. Yet I didn’t care. It was enough for now. I thought the best thing to call it was hope. I really loved the hope in his eyes.
His lips turned up in a half smirk and my lips followed, giving him the other half. We made each other smile without even saying a word.
Those were my favorite smiles.
I stood up from my chair and placed everything inside my backpack except for my current read. I hugged it tight as always, and when I passed Daniel’s desk, I heard him say my name. I didn’t turn back to him, yet I stood still.
“Were you thinking about what I think you were thinking about during class?” he whispered. My cheeks deepened in color. I heard his light laugh. “I think about it, too.”
My head turned to him to find his blues. I smiled. “Really?”
“Really, really.”
I turned away, and when I was out of his viewpoint, I smiled even bigger.
I smiled so wide my cheeks started to hurt.






Hey hey, don’t you forget
The way I moan your name or
The taste of my lips.
~ Romeo’s Quest


After school, I headed straight to the library and stayed there until late into the evening reading. I found a table that no one ever traveled by in the back corner of the library. It was slowly becoming my personal safe haven.
I didn’t always read though. Most of the time, I wrote out reasons why Daniel and I could somehow make it work. Why, if we started as friends, by the time school let out, we could transition into more than friends. There were only about one hundred and twenty-some days left in the school year.
One hundred and twenty-four to be exact.
Not that I was counting.
So mainly I wrote out my dreams. Fantasies I wished would someday come true.  I was stuck with only my creative daydreams and hopes of something more.
After picking up a few new books, I headed home. I should’ve worn a sweater over my teal sundress. I was freezing. It was clear that autumn’s warmth of Wisconsin was slowly being taken over by a chilled winter. The streetlights were shining bright, and the sky was slumbering.
While walking past the cemetery on May Street, I paused when I looked through the gated area. First I saw his car parked all alone in the parking lot. Then I saw him. My heart skipped a beat, yet it felt as if it were beating faster, too. Daniel made my once fixed heart do crazy things.
He was standing there alone, staring down at two gravestones.
Still a new kind of hurt.
“Oh…” I whispered to myself, placing my hands on my chest.
He looked like he had just gone for a workout in his shorts, plain black shirt, and running shoes. Was he a runner? I wished I knew. I wished I knew so much more about him.
He bent his knees, lowering himself closer to the stones. His lips were moving, and he brushed a finger across his upper lip before he chuckled. He laughed, yet it looked like he was frowning, too.
Those were the most painful—the sad laughs.
I glanced down the streets to see if anyone else was watching him. They weren’t. Of course they weren’t. Why would anyone watch someone standing in a cemetery? My hands twitched and I started rubbing them against my new book.
I should’ve kept walking. I should’ve pretended I hadn’t seen him.