Letters from Home (Love Beyond Reason #1)(25)

The flurry of activity that followed the accident carried her through those first hours. Family showed up. And right away, her mother took charge, setting up people to be with her as she sat at the hospital.

She didn’t want to hear about the heart attack the other driver had suffered or the family in southern California who’d lost a loved one. Zack could die. Even after surgery, the edema in his brain was severe enough that they’d induced a coma to try and protect it until the swelling subsided.

Green and red garland hung from the ceilings, swooping across the hallway, and little gold balls were hooked along each strand. Posterboard images of gifts and elves, bows and reindeer were plastered to the walls. Like a tunnel of cheer that created more of a knot of tension within her than the holiday spirit the staff was aiming for.

Lena bit her lip. She’d seen him once, before they’d taken him for another CT scan. But mostly, she was completely helpless. It didn’t matter that she was a doctor, she couldn’t do anything for him.

All her life, she’d been the one in charge, the one who knew what to do. They said he needed time. She knew that, but the urge to yell at everyone to do something was an invisible force, dragging her through some kind of hell on earth. Maybe she really was bossy. Tears threatened to spill at the thought of having been angry at him. If only—

“Hey, Lena.” Maria stood in the doorway of the waiting room.

Lena didn’t want anyone else to pat her on the back and offer her reassurances. She was a doctor, and the truth stared her in the face, mocked her with how little she could do. There was nothing.

Maria quietly entered the too-bright room and sat in the chair across from her. And sat. And sat. Silent energy flowed from her sister and rolled through her.

“What?” Lena spoke too sharply. “You have something to say. Say it.”

Remorse shone from Maria’s eyes. “I’m sorry for being so hard on you last night.”

“Forget it—”

“It wasn’t my place…and I was jealous.”

“What?” Lena wiped another tear from her cheek. Damn tears. “Why?”

Maria blushed. “You always have your life together. Everything—perfect. School, career…I looked forward to beating you to true love. Something! You were always the awkward one. And really, you never cared about dating or finding a man.”

Her sister sighed. “I have something for you.”

Lena gasped and reached for the familiar folded piece of paper Maria held out to her. “You had it this whole time?”

“They found it on Zack.”

Her trembling hands unfolded the letter and her eyes stung as she recited the words she already knew by heart.

Each day is another day closer to having you in my arms.

I can’t wait to see you on Christmas morning.

Stay safe. I’m praying for you.

Lena sucked in a breath. He’d added at the bottom:

P.S. It’s me.

A laugh bubbled out but quickly sent tears to her eyes. He would have given it to her that morning. Her thoughts wandered through the last week, the last year, the letters, the love they shared, all the time they’d wasted when they could have been together.

“Mr. Benson’s on his way. Dad went to get him.”

Lena nodded and dabbed at her eyes. “Good.”

One of the nurses came into the waiting room and nodded to Lena. “Zack’s back in his room, if you’d like to see him, Doctor Rodriguez.”

She stood and crossed into the hallway toward his room. Her throat ached, tight with emotion as images from this morning flashed through her brain. She took one step through the doorway and came up short.

“I can’t—.” She gasped for air, but couldn’t seem to catch her breath. Lena started to turn, wanting to run.

A hand came down on her shoulder. “Of course you can,” Maria spoke with conviction. “You are the strongest person I know.”

“I’m so scared,” she managed, tears streaming down her face.

“He needs you.”

Lena let her gaze linger at Zack’s face—even intubated, with the side of his face a battered, swollen mess, he was handsome. He had a splint on his left wrist, and under the thin hospital gown, his ribs were wrapped tightly.

Her feet found their way before she’d given it a second thought. She took Zack’s good hand in hers. It was cool, but not clammy or cold. The skin felt soft against her fingers. She lifted it and held it against her cheek.

Maria was wrong.

It was the other way around.

She needed him.





Chapter Twelve


“Just another day,” the woman whispered, a warm presence at his side. Her fingers wove through his, the touch a reminder. Of what? His brain couldn’t think. Like a fog swirling through the morning air against the trees and hills, his thoughts wouldn’t form. And his eyelids were too heavy to open.

Pain in his side throbbed and worked its way up through his shoulder. He arched away from it.

The touch returned. Where the hell was he?

“Maybe some more Demerol,” she continued in that soft, mellow voice. He wanted to see and tried to sit up. God, what was wrong with him? “Everything’s going to be okay. Back you go, soldier.”

Soldier? Had there been an attack? They were supposed to be out of Kandahar—pulled out. Where the hell was Joey? Where was that kid? He was supposed to report. No. He was dead, dead. Killed in action. His heart raced. Moving in sixteen hours. Troop transport over the border into Kuwait. Who was in charge? What happened? Why couldn’t he remember? Think!