Last Light(34)

I didn’t know if I could go another round, but Matt wasn’t pushing it. In fact, he only seemed to want to touch me.

I savored our kiss and moaned as he touched my stomach, my breasts, my thighs.

“So beautiful,” he sighed against my neck. “Sometimes, I can’t believe you’re mine.”

I pushed my fingers through his thick black hair. “I feel the same way. I want to know you, Matt. I want to know you better.”

He sat back and his hands settled on my thighs. He gazed at me evenly.

“I hope you mean that in the biblical sense.”

I thwapped his shoulder. “You know what I mean.”

“What is this lately? You … feeling like you don’t know me.”

I tucked my head under his chin, avoiding his eyes. “Your memorial. Everyone at your memorial knew you better than I do.”

“Everyone at my memorial thought I was dead. I think you know more than they do.”

“Come on, I’m serious. You never talk about your parents, your brothers, your faith.”

Matt tensed beneath me. He slid me off his lap and stood. He began to pace beside the coffee table, watching the fire.

“What faith?” he said. “And what exactly do you want to know about my family?”

“Nate said you’re religious.” I fidgeted with my new earrings.

“Oh, you know me, a regular churchgoer.” Matt scowled. “Nate has a lot to say lately.”

“He said you believe in God.”

“So what if I do?”

“Matt, I’m not attacking you.”

Matt ranged over to the fire and I watched his back. Hmmm, I loved the way his spine disappeared into his low-slung pants.

“What do you want to know about Nate? Nate is Nate. Beautiful home, beautiful wife, beautiful kids. And he’s the only doctor. Our parents would be proud.”

“He seems happy. With the kids and all…”

Matt glanced over his shoulder at me. I dropped my gaze.

“Kids, huh? Is that what you’re driving at?”

“I’m not driving at anything. Chill. God.” I held up my hands and Matt frowned. “You’re being way feistier than this conversation warrants, do you realize that?”

He glared at the fire.

“I don’t remember my parents,” he said.

I knew that was a lie—or I had a hunch it was—but I let Matt keep rambling.

“Seth, there’s no love lost between us.” He waved a hand. “When I went through all my bullshit, you know, drinking and partying and … rehabbing … Seth wanted nothing to do with me. He saw the toll my behavior took on our aunt and uncle. He thought I’d be the death of them. Hell, I was almost the death of myself, but he didn’t seem to give a f*ck.”

I began to crumple wrapping paper. I scanned the cabin for a trash can. Wow, had I ever dispatched the happy mood. Here I was, wanting to “talk” and get to know Matt, and now I couldn’t think of a thing to say. Matt was brusque. The conversation was morbid.

“Your inheritance,” I hedged. “How—”

“Not billions.” Matt collected the wrapping paper from my hands. He carried it to the trash can in the kitchen. “Millions. And since I know you’ll ask, my grandfather and his brother made their money opening factories in South America. All kinds of factories—tiles, bottles, energy plants. When a company was doing well, they sold it and moved on to something new. They were brilliant businessmen, worked all their lives, stayed ahead of the trends.”

Matt sounded bored. I cringed as I listened.

“The money’s been passed down. Mine is tied up in IRAs and investments, a little property in Montana, an offshore account. And of course there will be royalties.”

I closed the jewelry box and went to Matt. I hugged him from behind. His skin felt hot, firm and yet smooth. I laid my cheek against his shoulder blade.

“Is it so terrible, that I want to know this stuff about you?”

“No, Hannah.” He turned and tucked my body against his chest. “It’s not. But like this, it feels forced. I don’t want my phony memorial and a bunch of people who don’t even get me to be the reason you want to know me better, you know?” Matt cupped my face and lifted it. He watched me intently. “I want things to be natural between us. Let’s not live like other people. Let’s not be like other couples.”

Matt brushed a fingertip over my lips and I kissed it.

“I’m pretty sure we’re not like other couples,” I said.

He chuckled and a weight slid off my shoulders. Whew. Matt’s bad moods were steep and unpredictable, but they passed quickly.

We went back to bed and chatted about nothing serious. We fought sleep as long as we could, but around two we drifted off, Matt still mumbling as he slipped into dreams.





Chapter 20


MATT


I woke to the smell of coffee.

It’s Saturday. The realization hit me in the gut. My only whole day with Hannah.

I splashed water on my face and brushed my teeth, and then I went to find her.

She sat on the kitchen counter with her iPad on her thigh. She wore a black lace baby doll and nothing else. When she saw me, she smiled and slid off the counter.