Kiss of Fire (Imdalind, #1)(44)

“Well, one thing at a time, I suppose. At least we got you out of those hoodies.” She smiled; I cringed at the thought of reminding her that the deal was up tonight. I let the thought fall.

“Sooo...”

Since this was going to keep going, I took another bite of pizza.

“Wyn’s brother, he’s quite the looker.”

“Ew, Mom!” I cringed. “He’s like ten years older than me or something.”

“Really? He didn’t look that old.”

“Some people are blessed with good genes, I suppose.”

“Hmmmm... Well, would it be considered cradle-robbing if I tried to hook up with him?” She grinned, so I knew she was kidding, but the thought still made me sick.

“Gross, Mom. I can’t believe you even said that.”

“Well, can you blame me? I am a tad bit lonely after all. I could use a—”

“Stop right there, Mom, please. Besides, I thought you were still in love with Dad.”

Her face changed, her joyous smile slipping away to make room for an odd scowl. She looked almost, I don’t know... mad.

“I am. And speaking of your father, why didn’t you tell me that he sent you a letter?”

My face paled and my pizza crust dropped down to my plate. The empty trash can suddenly made sense; my mother never did household chores.

“I didn’t want to upset you,” I whispered.

“Well, at least I now know why you had such a hard time with it. Magic and cults... I wish your grandparents would have told me. I wish you would have told me. Maybe we could have gotten him some help.”

“I know.”

“I just don’t know why you didn’t tell me,” she scolded again.

“I didn’t want to hurt you,” I explained.

“Ryland and I were so worried; I think we both could have helped you so much more if you had been honest.”

I had been more honest with Ryland than with her, but I wasn’t going to tell her that. I just nodded my head in agreement.

“That boy worries about you way too much. You should have heard him—”

“Mom,” I cut her off, “why are you and Ry all of a sudden the best of friends?” She looked at me like I was being unreasonable. I didn’t wait for her to reply; I just trudged on. “First, you tell me to stay away from him, and now you two are having heart-to-hearts in the kitchen.”

“Well, we wouldn’t be having heart-to-hearts in the kitchen if you hadn’t been avoiding him all week.” Her voice was calm and sweet, but her words still cut through me like a knife.

“You told me to!” I could feel myself getting hysterical. “You told me to go make other friends and start cutting Ryland out of my life.”

“I was wrong.” She spoke so softly I barely heard her.

“What?” I asked.

“I was wrong.”

My head spun; my heart stopped beating. Was she saying what I thought she was saying? I didn’t even dare to hope. My mind swirled in a steady beat of confusion.

“I don’t understand,” I admitted.

“It was something Ryland said the other day. I don’t know; it just made sense.” She paused and I waited. I watched her in eager anticipation as she chewed her pizza.

“Oh, come on, Mom,” I whined when I couldn’t wait anymore. “Explain, please.”

“Okay. He told me he has had to fight his father for everything he has ever wanted, and ever gotten. Nothing has ever been handed to him, with the exception of money, of course. But with all his fighting and bartering, he has never been happy. And he would give up everything just to be happy and live the way he wants to live. It made me realize how wrong I was to dictate your happiness. When I told you to stay away from Ryland, I had your best interest at heart, but I don’t think that staying away from him can make you happy.” She paused. “I was wrong for that; I apologize. Can you forgive me?”

I nodded.

“But what about Timothy and his threats?” I whispered.

“I just got spooked, Joclyn. He can’t do anything to me,” she said, leaning forward over the table like she was telling me a secret.

“I guess that’s right,” I said.

“Besides, if he does fire me, I won’t have any trouble finding a job. I’ve already received about four offers.” She laughed and I joined in, although I wasn’t laughing at her job hunting success; I laughed at my new opportunities.

I wasn’t sure if this made everything easier or more complicated, but right at that moment, I didn’t care. I could decide for myself. I could kiss him, he could kiss me, or I could tell him to stay away from me forever. My heart soared away in endless joy. I wanted to run into his arms right at that moment. I wanted every single body-crushing fantasy to come true. At the moment, though, we still had manicures to complete.

I don’t think I had talked to my mother so much in my whole life. I told her everything. With the odd permission I had just received, I didn’t need to hold anything back. I told her how I felt about Ryland and how he made me feel when I was near him. I sighed as I explained the look he always got when he thought about something difficult. I cringed as I retold the story of the first time I came in contact with Timothy, a story she had never heard before.