Kiss and Don't Tell(55)

“You want to know about my sex life?”

“Well, I was referring to dating life, but do those go hand in hand for you?”

“Not much time to date.”

“Oh, right, duh. You’re probably really busy.”

“I meant, to be out on the dating circuit, trying to find someone I match with. If I were already matched up with someone, I’d dedicate time to that relationship.” I just want to make that clear to her. “But going on blind dates and spending time on dating apps? Yeah, I don’t have the energy for that, not after a long-as-fuck travel schedule.”

“So, then, during the season, are you celibate?” she asks.

I chuckle. “This last season I was.” I drive my hand over my head. “Some of the guys will go out to the bar, flash their professional hockey player card, and then take a girl back to the hotel, Posey and Hornsby being at the forefront of that endeavor.”

“Posey?” she asks, surprised. “I never would’ve guessed he does that. Not that there’s anything wrong with going to the bar and bringing someone home, but I just didn’t expect him to even know what sex is. He seems innocent.”

That makes me full-on belly laugh. “Oh, he’s not fucking innocent. Last year he got caught getting a blow job on the bus before we left the hotel.”

“What?” Winnie nearly shouts. “No way. Not Levi.” She shakes her head. “No man who lives and dies for a certain flavor of fudge gets blow jobs on team busses.”

“Think again. He might put on a certain fa?ade, but the dude gets around.”

“And Eli? Does he break hearts?”

We make our way past the sidewalk and to the edge of the summit house. I bring her to the fence. We both lean against it and look out at the expanse of mountains. It’s incredible, a view I’ll never get sick of, seeing peak after peak reaching up to the deep-blue sky.

“Eli might break ideas, but he doesn’t break hearts. He doesn’t ever let anyone get close enough to have their heart broken. But when it comes to the women he’s going to fuck, he lets them know that’s all it’ll ever be. He’s upfront. He’s never lied about his intentions, and you have to appreciate that, because at least he’s not leading anyone on.”

“Yeah, if I were into him, I’d probably appreciate that.”

“So, you’re not into Hornsby?”

She looks over at me and smirks. “No, I like the silent, broody type.” She pauses. “Think Halsey will go out with me?”

My jaw tightens as I look away. “He’s gay, sorry.”

Winnie laughs and pushes at my shoulder. “No, he’s not.”

“In this situation, he is.”

“Okay . . . so what do you think about me and Silas?”

“You trying to get on my nerves?”

Her smile stretches across her face, and even though she’s making me feel like a jealous fuck, I still get lost in the beauty of that smile. “Am I doing a good job?” she asks.

“An excellent job.”

I take her hand and pull her in close so her back is to my chest, we’re both looking out toward the mountains, and I have her pinned between me and the fence. Her head leans back against my shoulder and she says, “I could spend some serious time here.”

“In my arms?” I ask.

She chuckles. “Fishing for compliments, Pacey? I was talking about the summit house.”

“Sure you were. You’re just too shy to admit it.”

“Admit what?” she asks with a teasing tone in her voice.

“That you like me. That’s okay—no need to admit anything. I can see it in your eyes.”

“That sure of yourself?”

“Always.” I lean against her body and say quietly near her ear, “And when I don’t see it in your eyes, I feel it in your body language.”

“And how do I show you with my body language? Because it seems to me that you’re the one who’s been all about the touching and handholding, which leads me to believe you’re the one who likes me.”

“Yeah, I do,” I answer honestly, which seems to stun her, because she doesn’t have a witty comeback. Instead, she turns in my embrace so we’re facing each other.

“Just like that—you’re going to claim it? That you like me?” She studies me. “I have a hard time believing that.”

My brow draws forward. “Why do you have a hard time believing that?”

“Because you’re . . . well, you’re Pacey Lawes. We’re on different levels. I’m lost, have absolutely no future, a dwindling bank account, and a car stuck in a ditch in the mountains. I don’t see what I could possibly offer that you don’t already have or could get from someone in a better position than me.”

“Do you really think that little of yourself?” I ask. “Do you really not see what you offer?”

“I don’t see what I offer to you,” she says. “Trust me, I realize I’ve been living in a little fantasy world the last couple of days and I understand it’ll come to an end quicker than it started. I know I’m fun and interesting right now, but that will wear off.” She frees herself from my embrace and starts to walk toward the gondola. “I don’t even know what I was thinking, allowing myself to spend this day with you. Seems ridiculous, if you actually think about it.”