Kiss and Don't Tell(36)

“What are you doing?” I ask.

“Nothing.” He shakes his head and then stands from the chair. Standing above me, he asks, “If missionary is your favorite, what was the other position you did?”

“Um, when I was on top. But I never liked that because I always felt silly. Josh never let me stay on top for long, so I thought that maybe he didn’t like me up there, even though it felt better for me. I guess it made me feel self-conscious after a while.”

Stunned, Pacey stares at me and blinks a few times. Almost as if he just realized something, as if a lightbulb went off in his head.

“Josh—that was your boyfriend?”

“Yeah.”

He pauses again, his eyes diverted, as though he’s trying to solve a math equation. When I’m about to ask him if everything is okay, Pacey mutters something under his breath and then gets down on the ground. He stares at me for a second before his hand slides up my thigh, and from that little touch, more excitement races through my veins than Josh ever gave me. With his eyes connected to mine, he spreads my leg open, causing me to catch my breath.

Oh God, what is happening?

“Do you, uh, do this with the guys?” I ask, trying to ease the heat that’s building between us.

Pacey doesn’t say anything, but instead pushes my other leg open so I’m completely spread for him.

A dull throb begins to pulse between my legs. I’m turned on.

Just like that.

Completely clothed.

Nothing but legs spread in the grass.

And I’m turned on more than I can ever remember being.

I swallow hard as he leans forward, placing his hands on either side of my shoulders, and then he lowers his pelvis to mine.

“This is how you liked it?” he whispers.

This wasn’t how it was.

Not even close.

Josh wouldn’t hover above me like this, but instead just bury his head on my shoulder and pulse in and out. He never intensely stared at me or even spoke to me.

Maybe that’s what the problem was—we were missing the actual connection.

“Uh, it was a little different.”

“How?” Pacey asks as his pelvis connects with me, and oh . . . my . . . God. That’s his bulge.

That’s a big bulge.

That’s . . . wow. Josh was big, but this seems more intense.

“How is it different, Winnie?” he asks, his voice soft, ready to listen.

Everything is different.

His body is different. More commanding, more in charge.

His voice sends a wave of heat through my veins every time he speaks.

His eyes never leave mine, not even for a second.

He’s in the moment with me, rather than acting as if it’s some sort of chore. A box on a checklist.

“You’re, uh, bigger than him,” I answer.

“In what way?”

I should’ve seen that coming.

His pelvis slightly moves against mine. My limbs start to tingle and I realize, if he keeps doing this, if he keeps rocking gently, he could turn me into a puddle of desire. Right here, right now, I’m feeling so much more than I ever felt with Josh. It actually feels as if my insides are all pulling to the center of my body, wanting to feel what it’s like to have him pulse inside me.

“Answer the question, Winnie.”

I swallow hard. “Um, in every way.”

“Lawes, you back here?”

Oh shit.

Pacey pushes off me just as Levi rounds the corner, catching us on the ground, fumbling to get away from each other. In the midst of our fumbling, my leg swings out, kicks the table, and the tower comes crashing down in a heap of wood.

Blocks tumble.

We scramble.

And the entire scene could not be more obvious.

“Uh, what’s going on here?” Levi asks with that handsome smile of his. He’s far too entertained by what he just walked in on.

Pacey stands from the ground and then offers his hand to me to help pull me up. I take it, because what’s the point of not? We were obviously doing something we shouldn’t have been doing. Or should we have been doing it? We’re adults, but we’re also adults who barely know each other.

“I don’t know the etiquette,” I say out of sheer defense.

Wait . . . did I say that out loud?

“The etiquette for what?” Levi asks.

“Uh, Jenga. He said I had to answer the questions.” I point at Pacey.

“Oh, I see. Did you get the sex position block?” I nod and Levi continues, “I got that once. I had to do Hornsby doggy style. I think he enjoyed it way too much. And if you’re worried about etiquette, then, yes, you’re supposed to do what the block says unless you want another turn.” He looks back at our tower. “But seems as if the game is over.”

“Yeah, sure is.” I take a step away. “Well, thanks for a great game, chum.” I pat Pacey on the shoulder and grab the empty cider bottles. “I’ll just take these to the kitchen and then hit the hay.” I pretend to yawn, even though my body is wired. “Got to get that sleep. Never know what tomorrow will bring.” I look up to the sky. “And hey, it never started raining—” A drop hits my head, and then another, and then it starts to come down. “Spoke too soon.”

And then I take off toward the house, embarrassment consuming me.