KILLING SARAI(85)

Then I straddle his lap.

I kiss him softly and whisper once more, “Will you, Victor Faust? If that is your name.” I nudge the side of his face with my chin.

“Only under one condition,” he whispers hotly onto my mouth.

“What condition?”

He kisses my lips slowly.

“That I’m the one in control this time.”

I part my mouth near his, teasing him with a kiss that I want him to take from me, my fingertips gently enclosed around his jaw. He gazes into my eyes for a moment, reading my thoughts. And then both of his arms wrap possessively around my body, crushing me against him. His kiss is ravenous, his strong fingers digging into the skin of my back and I can feel the hardness of his cock so distinctly through the fabric of his pants that it makes me tremble. My lips part and my whole body shudders just feeling him there, wanting him inside of me more than I think I’ve ever wanted anything in my life.

He spears one hand within the back of my hair, forcing my head back and exposing my neck to him. He kisses my throat upward in a perfectly straight line until he finds my mouth again and takes my bottom lip into his teeth.

I feel two of his fingers slip into me below.

I gasp, my head still forced backward in his grasp, and I thrust my hips gently against his fingers.

“I want you inside of me,” I say breathily.

I can’t f*cking take it anymore.

With my lips on his, our warm tongues tangled, I fumble the button on his pants and then slide the zipper down.

He flips me over onto the bed, crawling on top of me and never breaks the kiss while stripping off his pants with one hand. And when I feel the warmth of his naked body, I wrap my legs around him, crushing him with my thighs, pushing myself toward him so I can feel the swell of his cock against my wetness. His mouth searches my neck and my chest until his teeth find my nipples and he bites them just hard enough to make me whimper.

“This goes against everything that I am, Sarai,” he says and then kisses me.

“No, it doesn’t,” I whisper and kiss him back. “It’s you becoming more of who you really are.”

And then he slides his cock inside of me slowly. I can barely keep my eyes open anymore. My legs tremble and my body shudders with tiny tremors that explode and infiltrate my insides. I gasp and shove my hips forward to force him deeper.

I never imagined that sex could feel like this, that the way my body is reacting to him could ever feel like this.

He raises his body from mine, still on his knees between my legs and he grabs my thighs tight in his hands, pulling me toward him. He f*cks me slowly at first, so slowly that it drives me mad. With each thrust he pushes deeper until my thighs are trembling and I can’t hold them steady around his body anymore. The back of my head arches against the pillow and I moan and gasp and dig my fingers into the flesh of his hips. He starts to f*ck me harder and I grip the pillow above my head before pressing my hands against the headboard, forcing myself against him, feeling his cock swell inside of me.

He collapses over me again and I feel the wetness of his mouth on my breast. My throat. My lips. His chest heaves with rapid breath and I can feel his heart beating against mine. He begins to pace himself and while he f*cks me slowly, his kiss deep and hot and hungry, he reaches one hand down between my legs and moves his fingers in a steady, persistent motion on my clit. I wind my fingers in his hair, gripping it so tight, moaning into his mouth, tasting his tongue.

So attuned with each other, we come together. He pulls out to finish, but doesn’t stop moving his fingers until my shuddering body finally eases and my trembling legs dissolve into mush on both sides of him.

He rests his sweating head across my breasts and I brush my fingers through his hair. We stay like this for the much of the night, in stillness and in thought.

And all I can think about is how I never want to leave this room with him.





~~~





I lay tangled in the sheets with Victor. The curtains on the window are fully opened and I gaze across the room at the bluish-black sky faintly illuminated by the city lights beneath it. Victor fell asleep sometime after he made love to me. Made love? I’m not sure I understand the true meaning of that phrase. I don’t think that this thing between us is love, or even lust. It’s something else, something powerful and unmistakable that neither of us have been able to ignore. But it doesn’t have a face. Or a name. Maybe he didn’t make love to me, but he didn’t f*ck me either.

It was definitely something else.

I hear his heart beating calmly against my cheek. I feel his breath emit lightly against the top of my hair. His body is so warm, almost hot, as I lie wrapped within his arms. His natural scent, it’s faint but comforting and draws me closer to him like a bee to nectar.

“Where do I go from here?” I whisper my private thoughts aloud and then bury myself further beside him when I don’t have an answer.

“We’ll figure it out,” Victor says and his arm gently squeezes around me.

I had no idea he was awake. I raise my head from his chest and lay down against his arm so that I can see his face.

“You’re not going to leave?”

It’s a long-shot, but I’m hopeful.

A second of quiet passes between us and his bare chest rises and falls with a deep and steady breath.

“Sarai, you know that I can’t take you with me,” he says and my heart sinks. “It’s just not realistic. My life is in the Order. It always has been. It wouldn’t be like waking up one day and deciding I hate my job and want to find something better. If I were to leave my Order—because that is precisely what I would have to do—the next hit that would be arranged would be on me. And on you.”