Just My Type(43)

“Don’t be jealous because Ron Jeremy loves me more than you.”

“He can’t name him Ron Jeremy,” she huffs.

“That man is the top porn star of all time. He’s a legend. Any hedgehog would be proud to be named after a legend. Just think how much fun it will be to hand over a clicking, hissing, hell beast of a legend named Ron Jeremy to your ex.”

And just like that, Ember gets a wicked gleam in her eye that makes my dick hard.

“Fine, but outside of this home, we’re calling him R.J.,” Ember relents after a few quiet minutes of contemplation, as Lincoln lets out a cheer, holding good old Ron Jeremy up toward the sky like Rafiki holding up Simba in The Lion King.

While Lincoln dances around the room celebrating, Ember inches between my legs and the coffee table to flop down on the couch on the other side of me.

“Just think of the pure joy you’re going to bring me every time we discuss your new pet,” I explain, leaning back against the cushions with her until our bodies our touching from our knees to our hips and up to our shoulders. “Did Ron Jeremy spit on you today? Did you give Ron Jeremy a bath? Ron Jeremy purrs if you rub his belly.”

Ember rolls her eyes at me and smacks her elbow into my side.

She watches Lincoln for a few minutes with a contented smile on her face before turning to look at me.

She’s so fucking beautiful.

I can’t believe she actually thought her being a mom would scare me a way. If anything, watching her with Lincoln, watching how happy she is just being his mom, it makes me want her even more. My mom’s face never lit up when I walked in a room, she didn’t build forts with me, she never did anything special for me that made me scream and jump up and down with excitement, we didn’t have any kind of secret pinky swear thing, and she definitely never hugged me like she hadn’t seen me in weeks, when it had only been a handful of hours. Ember is strong, and she’s amazing, and you can tell within seconds of being around the two of them that Lincoln adores her.

“We still didn’t get any work done,” Ember says softly, her eyes never leaving mine.

“Guess I’ll just have to stay for dinner then.” I shrug.

“Okay.”

The shocked look on her face tells me she didn’t mean to say that so fast, and I decide to keep the smirk in check for now.

“Lincoln!” I shout over to him, finally tearing my eyes away from Ember. “You like pizza?”

“I love pizza!” he yells. “Ron Jeremy says he loves pizza too!”

“Looks like it’s pizza with a porn star night,” I tell Ember, which earns me another jab to the ribs from her elbow.



“Here you go.”

I look up as a bottle of beer appears in front of me, grabbing it as I turn my head and watch Ember move around me. She sits down next to me on the top step of her porch, bringing her own bottle of beer up to her mouth.

“Thanks. Lincoln asleep?” I ask, watching the smooth column of her throat as she tips her head up to take a drink before answering me.

“He was asleep before his head even hit the pillow.” She laughs softly. “I’ve never seen that kid hoover down so many slices of pizza, or be so excited about playing hide-and-seek. Thanks for humoring him and playing like, ten thousand rounds of it.”

During my Google searching today, I learned that hedgehogs like to play hide-and-seek. After we gorged ourselves on pizza, I told Lincoln we should see if R.J. could do it. Which led to two hours of me helping Lincoln find new hiding spots, then getting R.J. out of his cage and putting him on the ground to try to sniff Lincoln out.

“He’s a hard kid to say no to. I think I had as much fun as he did anyway. That furry little porn star made me laugh every time he found Lincoln,” I tell her.

And it’s true. I laughed a lot tonight. I had fun. It was easy and comfortable and goddammit, I’m getting attached fast.

Fuck that. I’m not getting there. I am there.

“We should probably get to work,” Ember reminds me, waving her phone up in the air.

Pressing the record button on the audio app, she sets the phone down between us on the concrete stoop.

“This audio recording is going to be shit with us sitting out here,” Ember complains as the loud wailing of a police siren can be heard a few blocks away.

“Do you want to go back inside?” I ask, hoping she says no.

I don’t know if I can handle sitting next to her on the couch again, while she’s all soft and relaxed, and not want to climb on top of her like a fucking caveman.

“No.” Ember sighs, while I let out a relieved breath and my dick weeps. “I don’t think I’ll ever get used to all the noise, no matter how long I live here, but it’s still nice getting fresh air.”

I take a minute to glance out at the busy side-street Ember lives on, letting myself focus on the noise she’s talking about. More than one siren wails in the distance, dogs are barking, somewhere on another street people are playing loud rap music, the thumping bass the only thing you can hear, somewhere else a car alarm is going off, and above all of that city symphony, a few houses down, there’s a couple having a heated argument about a mysterious hotel room bill and, “That redheaded twat you only like because she swallows!”

“Your neighbors seem nice,” I tell her, which makes her laugh. “I didn’t actually hear the noise until you pointed it out. I’ve gotten so used to it that I just sort of tune it out.”