Just My Type(23)

Please consult your calendar and let me know post haste if this Wednesday evening around 6 p.m. at the gym works for you, to continue with our interview process. The Barracks is closed after six on Wednesdays, so it will be quiet enough to concentrate on all the professional, businessy things we need to do. GOD, Ember, get your mind out of the gutter. We won’t be completely alone where you’ll have a chance to take advantage of me. My sister will be here, doing some bookkeeping. She’ll keep you in line if you’re worried about not being able to control yourself around me. Also, please wear something comfortable. I’m putting you to work during the interview.

Below Average Baker That You’re Still Picturing Naked

To: Baker Matthews

From: Ember Hastings

Subject: Re: Hot, Manly Transcription

You are ridiculous. I’m only keeping the subject line of this email as is, because I feel like you could really use that ego boost. On account of you being so mediocre and all. (PINKY SWEAR)

In regards to picturing you naked? Eh. See: mediocre

Really? REALLY, BAKER? You attach a photo of you not wearing a shirt, taking a nap on a couch with a precious, tiny baby asleep on your chest? That’s just… low, man. Really low. I thought you were better than that. Wait, no I didn’t. Ha ha, my mistake!

I will report for duty on Wednesday at 6 p.m. sharp for our business interview. I swear to all that is good and holy, if you’re telling me to wear something comfortable because you expect me to go anywhere near a Stairmaster, consequences will be swift and painful. For you.

Ember “Shirtless Jocks Holding Babies Do Nothing for Me” Hastings

“Man, you’re bringing out the big guns with this woman, aren’t you? Attaching a picture of you sleeping on the couch with my daughter when she was born. Shameful.”

I sigh when I hear Blake leaning over my shoulder, once again reading my fucking emails without me knowing. It’s Wednesday, five minutes before six o’clock, and I needed something to keep my mind off what a pussy I am, being nervous about seeing Ember again. So, I read through our recent email exchanges while I waited for Ember to show up.

Like a fucking pussy.

“There’s this nifty thing called privacy. You should google it,” I mutter as I swivel around in the office chair to glare at my sister.

“I’ve cleaned the drool off your chin and put you to bed after having an hour-long discussion about the inventor of the Frisbee, and how he had himself cremated into a Frisbee after he died. You cried, hugging a Frisbee. For an hour. There’s no such thing as privacy between us,” Blake reminds me.

“That was one time, and no one told me you shouldn’t eat an entire pot brownie at once. Fuck off.”

My eyes dart over her shoulder to the clock with the Army insignia in the center of it that’s hanging on the wall above the door leading out into the gym.

“You’re nervous,” Blake suddenly states.

I look away from the clock to see her staring down at my leg. Which is currently bouncing up and down. With a growl, I press my hand against my thigh to make it stop.

“Don’t—”

“Make a big thing out of this,” Blake interrupts me, finishing my sentence with a roll of her eyes. “Eat shit, little brother. In case you’ve forgotten, I’ve met the women you’ve dated before. You never once got all heart-eyes and nervous leg flutters over any of them. You really like this one. And she’s not interested.” She lets out a loud, boisterous laugh, holding her hand against her stomach as she continues to cackle.

“I don’t see why this is so funny to you. And she’s interested, believe me.”

“It’s funny, because she’s not falling all over you like every other woman you’ve come in contact with since you hit puberty and got all pretty and shit.” Blake continues to laugh as she points at my face. “You’re going to have to work for this one. I like this woman already.”

“Don’t get too attached just yet. I’m waiting for the other shoe to drop. She can’t be this perfect,” I tell her, waiting for her laughter to die down before I continue. “But she didn’t ask me about my knee. She didn’t even look at it. Didn’t care. Not in a bitchy way. In a ‘it’s none of my business’ way. And she told me I was an asshole when she got her first good look around the gym. She didn’t tell me I was a hero; she didn’t go on and on about how good of a person I am. She called me an asshole.”

There’s nothing but the sound of the ticking clock in the room as Blake processes what I just said. She knows why this is a big thing for me. She knows better than anyone. I stay silent as she clears her throat, pushing back her emotions.

“Well, you are an asshole. It’s good her judgement isn’t clouded because of… all that,” Blake says with a wave of her hand in my direction.

When I hear the ding of a bell, indicating someone just walked through the front door, I jump up from my seat so fast the office chair goes flying back and slams into the desk.

This just makes Blake laugh loudly all over again, adding a head shake as she jogs over to the door, opening it a crack and peeking out.

“Daaamn. She really does have a great ass. Don’t tell my wife I said that,” Blake whispers back to me over her shoulder.

With a sigh, I pull my shit together and walk over to the door, shoving Blake out of the way. Opening up the door the rest of the way, I step out of the office, my feet jerking to a stop as soon as I get my first look at Ember again after four days.