Jesus Freaks: The Prodigal (Jesus Freaks #2)(76)

Embarrassed and humiliated, I refuse to sink lower by chasing after him. Instead, I turn on my heels, rejected, and shuffle back to my dorm.

Bridgette has returned from her volunteer post, and is wildly shoving things into her duffel bag. Upbeat Christian music praising Jesus and good life and relationships is blaring through tiny speakers on Eden’s desk. She has a hairbrush in her hand and is singing along with the high-pitched songstress on the computer, and matching quite well. As soon as Eden’s eyes land on me, she races to her computer, turning the music off. This gets Bridgette’s attention, whose eyes widen after she assesses me.

“What’s wrong?” Bridgette says, sounding horrified. I must look especially pathetic.

My chin quivers as I plunk into my desk chair. “Matt doesn’t want to date me. He just wants to be my friend, apparently.”

I say it as if I’ve told them everything. As if they know the feelings I have for him. But they don’t. I’ve been so guarded about certain parts of my life, even through trying to be more open. Because of that, there’s going to be a lot of catching up I’m going to have to do with them.

“What?” Eden asks, handing me a tissue before the first tear even fully leaves my eyes. She’s good.

I allow myself to fully sink into girly-mode for this one. It hurts. Dabbing the warm tear from my right eye, I sniff. “I asked him to date me, and he said no. Then he walked away. Like a jerk cowboy riding his jerk horse into the crappy sunset. Is it because I’m the one who asked?” I look to my roommates who are far more knowledgeable about Christian dating than I am.

Eden chuckles, trying to cover it up with a cough. “I don’t think so.”

“Maybe?” Bridgette shrugged. “That doesn’t seem like Matt, though, does it? I don’t really know him. I didn’t know you liked him.”

Eden rolls her eyes. “Come on Bridgette, yes you did. They’re next to each other so much, I bet people who don’t know who either of them are assume they’re together.”

Sitting forward, I crack a smile. “Really? Is it obvious? I didn’t think it would be … we don’t, like, flirt flirt.”

Eden arches an eyebrow. “Yes you do.”

“We do? Well it’s not been any flirting like I’m used to.” My words sink in a bit.

“See? That’s just it. Over here in Christian-landia, we might not be as graphic as some of your high school friends, but we know the art of flirting. And, Matt has been relentless.”

I break into laughter at Eden’s self-deprecating term for where she’s from, and even Bridgette laughs, before adding her own two cents. “Yeah,” she agrees. “The way he always looks at you, I just assumed he’d asked you out and you had turned him down. That’s why I thought you didn’t like him that way.”

“Well now what do I do?” I prop my chin up on my hands, resting my elbows on the desk.

My two roommates look at each other, having one of their many silent conversations. I hope to get in on those at some point.

“Hello?” I wave my hand when they’ve been silent. “Is this something we pray about, or something?”

Bridgette laughs. “If you want to. But, honestly, I think you should just let it go for a while. You’ve been through a lot lately, and you’ve mentioned you think there’s cruddy stuff going on at home with Matt. Maybe he really does just need a friend right now?”

I huff, hating that she’s right. Which makes me feel worse, since I tried to force the poor kid to go out with me.

“It’s all right,” Eden tries to be reassuring, rubbing my shoulder. “You guys will have a couple of weeks to kind of forget about this before you see him in Georgia.”

“Oh man! I forgot about that.” I thump my head onto the desk. “I was hoping I’d have six weeks to forget about it,” I say to the wood.

“Well,” Eden’s tone perks up. “If you want to chicken out when the time comes, just call me and we’ll figure out a way to have you stay with me while Roland goes to Georgia.”

Standing, I close my suitcase and unplug my phone charger from the wall. “Eden, I might just take you up on that. Okay, girls. I’m off for the most bizarre six-week journey of my life. Pray for me that I come back in one piece.”

Bridgette gives me a quick, but tight hug. “I’m sure it’ll be nothing compared to what you’ve already been through this semester. You’re tough. I’m proud of you, Kennedy.”

Oddly enough, her overly-positive attitude is quite calming at the moment.

“Yes,” Eden adds. “I actually can’t wait for you to come to my house so I can show you off to all my friends. They keep asking about you.”

“Come on, Eden, really? You want to take me around like some moderately famous sideshow?”

She laughs, shaking her head. “Not because of Roland, Captain Paranoia. Because I’ve told them how fierce you are. Determined. Focused. Yeah, they know about Roland. But, how you carry yourself in spite of that is what has my friends interested. They think you’re cool. Because I do.”

I hold out my arm, welcoming Eden into a group hug. “I love you girls,” I whisper.

Because, oddly enough, I really do. Almost four months in a ten-by-twelve room with two girls who scared me to death the first time I met them has changed me. Not just my attitude toward them, but to the others like them I see around campus. Slowly, my assumptions are leaning toward how my roommates are, not the horror-story version I concocted before ever setting foot on campus.