Into the Fury (BOSS, Inc. #1)(105)

She nodded. Luke had told her all that. “What about the men who shot at us at Dirk’s?”

“Nick says they were Gallagher’s hired guns. It wasn’t personal to them. Gallagher will probably make a deal, give them up to the authorities in exchange for a lesser sentence. Even with that, he’ll be in prison for a very long time.”

Fresh tears welled. “How do you do it? I don’t understand. Nick’s a private investigator. How do you handle the worry? Never knowing exactly where he is or what he’s doing? Whether he’s been shot or even killed?” Her heart squeezed painfully. “Even if Ethan wants a future with me, I don’t think I can do it.”

“Listen to me, Val. Ethan and Nick are good men. So are Dirk and Luke and Ian. These guys are the best. The kind of men the world needs. It’s a better place because they’re in it, helping protect the rest of us.”

“I know, but . . .” Val shook her head. “I’m not tough enough to handle the kind of lives they lead.”

Samantha reached over and caught her hand. “You may not be tough, but you’re strong. You’ve proved that again and again. Men like Nick and Ethan need strong women to come home to. That’s what makes them strong. Do you love him?”

Val glanced away, wiped another tear from her cheek. “I love him so much. I can’t stand to think of him lying in there in pain.”

She swallowed past the ache in her throat. After the phone call from Luke and her wild ride with Dirk down the mountain to the hospital, she’d been frantic. Ethan had been shot. She didn’t know how badly he’d been injured, didn’t know if he might be dying.

Dirk had tried to keep her calm, but too much had happened. By the time they’d reached the hospital, she’d been nearly hysterical. No way could she handle anything like that again.

“Ethan loves you,” Sam said. “I could see it in his eyes every time he looked at you.”

Val glanced away. Sometimes loving someone wasn’t enough.

“Our men are tough,” Samantha continued. “And you know how capable they are. But they have a heart and soul just like everyone else. They need someone to love them, someone they can lean on, someone to help them stay strong. Ethan needs you, Val. He needs you to be strong for him.”

Val looked at Sam and an odd feeling moved through her. She had survived the loss of her parents, survived Bobby’s death, and had pulled herself up by her bootstraps. She had survived the terror she had endured on the fashion show tour, and that took guts. She was strong. She knew that deep down.

But she had never thought she might have something to give to Ethan. She had always thought he would be the protector, the one to take care of her, even though she was a self-sufficient, independent woman.

But Samantha’s words stirred something deep inside her, some sense of rightness that seemed to put everything in its proper place. For the first time, she realized Ethan needed someone to take care of him, too. Maybe needed her even more than she needed him.

“What you’ve been through,” Samantha said. “I know what it’s like. I told you what happened to Nick and me in Alaska, how close we both came to being killed. But their job isn’t usually so dangerous. Now that Nick’s married, he’s more selective about the cases he chooses. Nick wants to be a husband and father. He wants to be around to raise his kids. I think Ethan wants that, too.”

Val swallowed, the pressure in her chest beginning to ease. Maybe there was hope for them. If she was truly the woman Ethan wanted.

The doctor walked in just then. At the serious look on his face, fear poured through her. Her heart jerked and started pounding.

Then he smiled. “Ethan’s out of surgery. He did great. We only had to take a small portion of the spleen, not all of it. He’ll be in the recovery room for a while. The nurse will let you know when you can see him.”

Val turned to Samantha and the two of them hugged. “He’s okay,” Val said, repeating the doctor’s words. “He did great.”

Samantha grinned. “Yes, he did.”

The news spread throughout their worried little group. People went in and out of the waiting room, went for coffee, then returned. Hannah sat on Val’s lap for a while. One of the nurses handed the little girl a coloring book, and once she knew her daddy was going to be okay, she sat on the floor and colored.

Then the door opened and a nurse in green scrubs walked into the waiting room. “You’re Valerie, right? His girlfriend?”

She nodded. “I’m Val.”

“He’s asking for you. You can see him, but only for a few minutes.”

Val came up off the sofa. “Thank you.”

Samantha caught her hand as she started for the door. “Remember what I said.”

But all Val could think of was Ethan.

She followed the nurse out the door, down the hall into the recovery room, up to his bedside. His skin was pale, his eyes closed. Black lashes fanned his cheeks. He was hooked up to a heart monitor. Bags of saline hung from a rolling IV stand, dripping fluid into his veins.

Her heart hurt and fresh tears blurred her vision. She reached out and took hold of his hand. The warm, strong feel of it steadied her.

Ethan’s eyes cracked open. He saw her and an uncertain look came over his face. “I’m . . . okay, honey. Or I . . . will be.”