In the Middle of Somewhere (Middle of Somewhere, #1)(99)

“But?” I prompt.

“But you can’t read people’s minds, baby. You can’t always figure out what’s gonna happen just by being smart. And even if you could—” He shakes his head. “—you shouldn’t. You shouldn’t have to try so hard to fit in because you’re scared.”

I tense, but Rex’s hand is still gentle in my hair.

“I know, I know, you’re never scared, right?” He gives me an unreadable smirk. Amused? Doubtful? Indulgent? “Just, people are gonna like you or they aren’t. There’s no sense in trying to change how you act to suit them. It’ll just drive you crazy.”

I open my mouth to say something, to insist that I don’t do that. But then Rex is kissing me, holding me in place with his soft hands and his hard body, until all I can think about is how damn good he smells and how amazing he feels.

“I like you, Daniel. Just you. I like you so much.” Rex’s voice is low and sincere and I can feel in his kiss how much he means it. It makes me feel… treasured. Appreciated in a way I don’t recognize. “And I want to keep getting to know you. The real you. Okay?”

“I… like you too. A lot.” Jeez, and the award for Understatement of the Century goes to…. But he’s right. I love getting to learn all the strange little things that make Rex Rex. I may have been on my best behavior with him, but I’ve also been more relaxed when I’m around him than I can ever remember being with anyone but Ginger.

“Like, you know that feeling,” I try to explain, “where it’s Sunday night and you have school or work the next morning but then it’s a snow day and you don’t have to go in? You feel like that.”

“I feel like a natural disaster?” he teases, but his gaze is intent.

“No,” I say, forcing myself to say what I mean. “A relief. You feel like a huge relief.”

Rex’s eyes go very soft.

“You feel like a relief too, Daniel,” he says.

I decide to take Ginger’s advice, pushing down the roiling fear of rejection in my gut. “Hey, Rex?” I ask. “What are you doing for Thanksgiving?”

“Nothing,” he says, his eyes narrowing.

“Would you want to maybe have it with me?” I try my best to keep my tone casual so he doesn’t feel any pressure to say yes.

“Yes,” Rex says instantly. “Yes, please.” He kisses me hard and pulls me into his arms.

“I like this whole not overthinking thing,” I tell him.




SO, YEAH, this week has been pretty great until I run into Will at Mr. Zoo’s when I go to invite Leo to Thanksgiving. And I remember that he knew about Rex’s dyslexia and purposely hid it from me. Until I remember that he’s touched Rex and therefore I hate him. Okay, so, apparently I’ve also turned jealous and irrational this week. At least where Rex is concerned.

Will and Leo don’t notice me at first. Leo’s behind the counter and Will is leaning on it, his chin in his hand as Leo talks quietly. When I wave, Leo turns bright red, as if I’ve caught him doing something he shouldn’t be. Will just straightens up and levels me with a look that dares me to tease them about their obvious flirting.

“Hey, Daniel, how’s it going?” Leo asks, fiddling with the tape dispenser.

“Can I have a word?” I say to Will, and walk back outside before he can answer.

“Let me guess,” Will says, as he leans against the shop window. “This is about Rex.”

Now that he’s standing in front of me I don’t know what the f*ck I’m thinking. What I want to say is, “Why didn’t you f*cking tell me about Rex’s dyslexia!” But, why would he? He barely knows me. Rex was his lover. It’s not his place to say a goddamned thing. But I’m so angry with him for knowing and so angry with myself for not noticing that I say it anyway.

“Excuse me?” Will says.

“Fuck!” I say. “I know, I know. Never mind. Goddammit!”

“Look, Daniel, everyone Rex has ever cared about either died on him or left town, okay? Then, here’s you. The hot professor from Philly who’s slumming it in our little town until something better comes along. I mean, I get it; I do. You’re so Rex’s type it isn’t even funny. The perfect lost cause. I’m not surprised he’s all over you like a dog on a bone. But, before you come in here with your accusations and your self-f*cking-righteous demands about Rex, I want to ask you one question. Are you here to stay? Or the second the ivory tower says jump are you going to say From what window?

“Because, in case you can’t tell, Rex thinks you might just be passing through. I can tell just by looking at you together: he’s hung up on you something good, but a part of him won’t let himself open up to you because he thinks you’ll be f*cking out of here on the next train. Frankly, I’m shocked he told you about his dyslexia. And if I were a betting man, I’d say he didn’t. I’d say it came up some other way and he was too much of a mensch to outright lie to you about it. So you just watch yourself, Daniel, is what I’m saying. You’re crazy about him; I can see that too. But I don’t trust you. I think you’re scared and I think, when it comes down to it, that you’ll hurt him.”

Will delivers this whole monologue without pausing or looking away once.