In a Dark, Dark Wood(7)

I tried to tear my eyes away as I realised Flo was still talking.

‘… and upstairs are the bedrooms,’ she finished. ‘Want a hand with those cases?’

‘No, I’m fine,’ I said, at the same time Nina said, ‘Well, if you’re offering …’

Flo looked taken aback, but gamely took Nina’s huge, wheeled case and began to lug it up the flight of frosted-glass stairs.

‘As I was saying,’ she panted as we rounded the newel post, ‘there’s four bedrooms. I thought we’d have me and Clare in one, you guys in another, Tom will have to have his own, obvs.’

‘Obvs,’ said Nina, straight-faced.

I was too busy processing the news that I’d be sharing a room. I’d assumed I’d have my own space to retreat to.

‘And that just leaves Mels – Melanie, you know – as the odd one out. She’s got a six-month-old so I thought out of us girls, she probably deserved a room of her own the most!’

‘What? She’s not bringing it, is she?’ Nina looked genuinely alarmed.

Flo gave a honking laugh and then put her hand up to her mouth, smothering the noise self-consciously. ‘No! Just, you know, she’ll probably need a good night’s sleep more than the rest of us.’

‘Oh, OK.’ Nina peered into one of the bedrooms. ‘Which one is ours then?’

‘The two back ones are the biggest. You and Lee can have the one on the right if you like, it’s got twin beds. The other one’s got a four-poster double, but I don’t mind squishing up with Clare.’

She stopped, breathing hard, on the landing and gestured to a blond wood door on the right-hand side. ‘There you go.’

Inside there were two neat white beds and a low dressing table, all as anonymous as a hotel room, and, facing the beds, the creepily obligatory wall of glass, looking north over the pine forest. Here it was harder to understand. The ground sloped up at the back of the house and so there was no spectacular view as there was from the front. Instead the effect was more claustrophobic than anything – a wall of dark green, already deepening into shadow with the setting sun. There were heavy cream curtains gathered in each corner, and I had to fight the urge to rip them across the enormous expanse of glass.

Behind me Flo let Nina’s case fall with a thud to the floor. I turned, and she smiled, a huge beam that made her suddenly look almost as pretty as Clare.

‘Any questions?’

‘Yes,’ Nina said. ‘Mind if I smoke in here?’

Flo’s face fell. ‘I’m afraid my aunt doesn’t like smoking indoors. But you’ve got a balcony.’ She wrestled with a folding door in the glass wall for a moment and then flung it open. ‘You can smoke out here if you like.’

‘Super,’ Nina said. ‘Thanks.’

Flo struggled with the door again, and then swung it shut. She straightened, her face pink with exertion, dusting her hands on her skirt. ‘Right! Well, I’ll let you get unpacked. See you downstairs, yah?’

‘Yah!’ Nina said enthusiastically, and I tried to cover it by saying ‘Thanks!’ unnecessarily loudly, in a way that only managed to make me sound weirdly aggressive.

‘Um, yeah! OK!’ Flo said, uncertainly, and then she backed out of the doorway and was gone.

‘Nina …’ I said warningly, as she made her way over to gaze out across the forest.

‘What?’ she said over her shoulder, absent-mindedly. And then, ‘So Tom’s definitely of the male persuasion, judging by Flo’s determination to quarantine his raging Y chromosomes from our delicate lady parts.’

I couldn’t help but snort. That’s the thing about Nina. You forgive her stuff that other people would never get away with.

‘I think he’s probably gay – don’t you? I mean, why would he be on a hen night otherwise?’

‘Um, contrary to what you seem to believe, batting for the other team doesn’t actually change your gender. I think. No, wait—’ She peered down her top. ‘No, we’re all good. Double-Ds all present and correct.’

‘That’s not what I meant, and you know it.’ I banged my own case down on the bed, and then remembered my washbag, and unzipped it more gingerly. My trainers were on top, and I set them down neatly by the door, a reassuring little ‘emergency exit’ sign. ‘Hen nights are partly about an appreciation of the male form. That’s what women have in common with gay men.’

‘Christ, now you tell me. Perfect excuse lined up and you never trotted it out until now. Could you Reply-all to my next hen-night invitation saying “Sorry, Nina can’t come as she doesn’t appreciate the male form”?’

‘Oh for God’s sake. I said partly an appreciation.’

‘It’s all right.’ She turned back to the window, peering out into the forest, the tree trunks dark streaks in the green gloaming. There was a tragic crack in her voice. ‘I’m used to being excluded from heteronormative society.’

‘Fuck off,’ I said grumpily, and when she turned around she was laughing.

‘Why are we here, anyway?’ she asked, throwing herself backwards onto one of the twin beds and kicking off her shoes. ‘I don’t know about you, but I haven’t seen Clare in about three years.’