Hooked 4 (Hooked #4)(18)

We stopped to grab water as we neared the end of the trail. I tossed the water back into my mouth, and he wrapped his sweating arms around me. He planted a great kiss on my mouth. Suddenly, his cell phone began to ring in his pocket. He grabbed it and looked at it, saying “Shit!”

“What is it?”

“They’re about to demolish the new building I bought for the bookstore. I really need to get the ball rolling on this,” he said. “I completely forgot.”

I smiled at him, taking his hand. “Let me come with you.”

We rushed toward the street and hailed a taxi. We cuddled in the backseat, unable to remove our hands from each other’s bodies. We coursed toward Wicker Park, toward a building not far from my apartment building. In fact, it was only three blocks away. I eyed him, and he shrugged. “I thought ahead, okay?” he tickled me.

We lurched from the taxi and I stared up at the building. It was about to fall over; this was clear. “You’re going to demolish this beautiful place?” I teased him once more.

A few construction workers had already arrived, as had Mel and her baby, Jackson. I rushed toward them and flung my arms around both of them, feeling like I was on top of the world. I kissed baby Jackson on his sweet little nose. This pleased Mel, of course. She grinned at me. “Sorry I couldn’t tell you about—about what I was sending you to, yesterday.”

She was referencing sending me to the old dance studio, to find Drew. “You little sneaky lady,” I said, laughing. “It was wonderful. Actually—one of the best days of my life.”

She brought her hand out and grabbed my shoulder. “You’ll be great together, Molly. I think you need each other. You know? You’re both two of the loneliest people in the world. Maybe that won’t be true anymore.”

I thought about this as the great bulldozer came forward, as its great ball swung from side to side. Had Drew been lonely before me? Certainly being afraid of things made you afraid to seek comfort, seek solace. My mother had been afraid for years after the death of my father. And she’d been afraid even before that of being alone. That was why she’d stuck with him all those years; that was why she’d decided to stay in Indianapolis instead of pursuing her dreams.


I had been afraid as well. I’d been afraid I wasn’t good enough for my dreams. I had been afraid that I wasn’t going to succeed and that I wasn’t good enough for Drew and that—well. The list went on and on. My fear was immense.

Drew placed a hat on his head as the bulldozer crept further. He gestured toward several men as they discussed their plan of attack. I turned toward Mel, my best friend in the world. “Do you want to grab bagels for the boys?”

“Coffee, god. I need some coffee,” Mel spurted, laughing.

We walked toward the coffee shop, once more. The same coffee shop in which I’d bumped into Drew. The same coffee shop that’d changed my life. Just as I’d hoped, I found the young, pimpled man at the counter.

“Good morning,” he said to us, bleary-eyed.

“Good morning!” I called to him in a chipper voice. I looked in the great window, looking at the bagels, all stacked in a line. “We’re going to need something like ten bagels. With cream cheese. Let’s see.” And I named them all, haphazardly, one after another. Poppy seed. Blueberry. Everything. Pumpernickel. I handed a wheat one to baby Jackson, who’d begun to eat solid foods recently. He pounded it on his mother’s chest and laughed and laughed with just a hint of maniacal attitude.

We paid for the bagels, and walked back just as the bulldozer struck the building, allowing bricks to crumble to the earth. Everyone below began to clap. It was ridiculously amazing to see something—something that had taken time, effort, everything—to fall to the ground. But there it went, brick-by-brick.

I watched a young mother and her young son walk toward it on their way to someplace else. The young son spoke up to his mother, asking her: “What are they doing that for?”

“They’re making a bookstore, Jim,” the mother answered. “We can buy your comic books there.”

Jim the young boy leaped into the air, showing me the bottom of his orange tennis shoes. Tiny creatures rimmed the exterior, giving them a whimsical quality. There was so much you couldn’t understand about a person unless you looked at them closely; unless you gave them room to breathe.

The young boy and his mother walked on, leaving me there with Mel and Jackson. Jackson cooed up at his mother, a small bit of bagel dangling from his new teeth. Mel shook her head, looking toward me. “Do you see your future?”

I laughed, shaking my head. “I have a whole lotta stuff to do before that,” I said, running off.

I reached Drew, finally. I caught his body up in my arms and held him close in a deep hug. I looked up at his surprised eyes. “What are you doing?” he murmured, not unkindly.

“I just realized I have some things to do today. Can I meet you at your place tonight? We can drink wine, talk to Hector, dance in the big room, and make love?”

“Especially that last part.” He winked at me and leaned down, kissing me on the lips passionately, if only for a moment.

I was off. I rushed back toward my old dance studio and burst into the well-lit arena. I glided toward the back where I found my old dance outfits. I laced the shoes up tightly, all the way to just below my knees. I flung myself forward onto my toes, and took small, graceful steps toward the middle of the room. I began to twirl, to glide. I was presenting myself for all the world to see. I was a dancer, beyond anything else.