Happily Letter After(86)

Ironically, after all these years, letters had become a part of our relationship again. Writing to me was Birdie’s favorite way to keep in touch while away at school. She said it was sort of like journaling—the only difference was that she’d share her thoughts and feelings with me rather than keeping them private. It made me so happy that she considered me not only a mother figure but a friend. I looked forward to every single one of her letters.

My son came up behind me, startling me out of my thoughts.

“What are you wearing on your head, Mommy?”

I pulled him toward me as I continued looking out the window. “Oh . . . this is my special crown. Your sister gave it to me a long time ago.”

“It looks too small for you.”

I laughed. “Is that your way of telling me you want to wear it?”

Seb wrinkled his adorable little face like he’d just smelled bad fish. “No! Crowns are for girls.”

“Actually, I think anyone can wear a crown.” I leaned in and rubbed my nose against his. “But I’m glad you don’t want to wear mine, because it’s my most favorite piece of jewelry I own.”

Seb Junior was born six years ago as a result of artificial insemination with one of my stored eggs after Sebastian and I had tried unsuccessfully for a couple of years to conceive naturally. Like his sister, Seb had blond hair and Sebastian’s face.

“She’s not here yet?” I heard my husband say from behind.

“No. Her car must have gotten stuck in traffic.”

Sebastian placed his hand on the small of my back. “God. I keep thinking that Marmaduke is going to be so excited to see her, and then I remember he’s gone.”

A tear started to stream down my cheek at the thought of that.

Our precious dog passed away from lymphoma earlier this year, right after Birdie went away for her first semester at Stanford. That day—having to call her and tell her Marmaduke was gone—was the second-hardest day of my life.

We’d gotten his dog tag made into a necklace for Birdie as a Christmas gift. We wanted her to always have something to remember him by, since their relationship was so special.

“There she is!” Seb Junior proclaimed excitedly when he noticed Birdie’s Uber pull up.

Sebastian ran to the door. My son and I scurried behind him. It was like a race.

Birdie stepped out of the vehicle. Just the mere sight of her put a huge smile on my face. Recently she’d developed a style that was very bohemian chic. Her long blonde hair was tied into a side braid, and she had on a flowy skirt that hung to the ground. But it was what was on top of her head that made me well up. I covered my mouth, feeling emotional. My Birdie had her crown on top of her head, too. I couldn’t believe it. Though I probably shouldn’t have been so surprised. We’d somehow always been on the same page, right from the very start.

Birdie ran up the steps and into Sebastian’s waiting arms.

He hugged her tightly. “My baby girl is home.”

“I’m so freaking glad to be home.” She moved down to rustle her little brother’s hair. “Hey, squirt. Thank you for holding down the fort for me.”

When she stood up, she wrapped her arms around me. “Smommy! You have yours on, too! I missed you so much.”

“Smommy” was the name she’d given me shortly after Sebastian and I got married. It was short for Sadie-Mommy. Honestly, it was perfect for us. I wasn’t her actual mommy. I was her Sadie-Mommy.

She looked around, and then I saw the tears form in her eyes when the realization hit that our big lug of a dog wouldn’t be running to greet her. It was the first time since she was ten that she was walking into this house without him.

“I can’t believe he’s gone.”

I wiped my eyes. “I know, honey.”

“It’s literally the only reason I didn’t want to come home.”

Sebastian rubbed her back. “He was like your soul mate. He’ll always be with you, Birdie.”

“Can we go to the graveyard tomorrow?”

“Of course,” I said. “We were planning to do that at some point during your break.”

She shook her head. “Okay. Happy thoughts. Happy thoughts.” She turned to me. “I’m starving.”

“Well, I just happened to make your favorite kale salad, and Dad brought a tray of Birdie’s Pasta Bolognese home from the restaurant today.”

She pumped her fist. “Hell yeah.”

The four of us ventured into the dining room, where I’d already had the table set.

“Will Magdalene be stopping by?” Birdie asked. “I was hoping to see her.”

“She’ll be visiting tomorrow for Christmas Eve to say hello.”

“Oh cool.”

Magdalene no longer worked for us but was still like family. We kept in touch, and Birdie made sure to write to her all the time from college. Magdalene had informed us a few years ago that she needed to step back to take care of her ailing husband. It was perfect timing, really, because I had been considering quitting the magazine to stay home with Seb. So it worked out for everyone.

That decision in retrospect was a good call, considering I was about to give birth for a second time in a few months.

Birdie paused to look at my belly before serving herself a heaping plate of salad. “You’ve really popped, Smommy.”