Fumbled (Playbook #2)(86)

He nods and opens the door, plastering a big, fake smile on his face as he goes. “I can carry that, Mrs. D.”

“Why, thank you, young man,” Mrs. Duncan says, doubt in her voice.

She knows he’s full of it too.

Ace grabs the cobbler from her and pushes through the nonsqueaking gate. My eyes follow him for a second before they meet Mrs. Duncan’s worried ones.

“Here’s the key. Ace knows how to work the alarm.” I drop the key in her palm. “I shouldn’t be gone too long.”

Her warm hand wraps around mine, her grip strong even in her old age. She catches my gaze and whispers with a force I’ve never heard from her, “Maya would’ve liked him.”

I close my eyes and shake my head, not wanting to hear this.

“No.”

“Yes,” she says. “I know you want to run. Maya knew it too, said you’d never get serious with anyone because that boy right there”—she points to Ace, who is watching us from the porch—“had your whole heart. But if she would’ve seen you these last few months, she would’ve known she was wrong. Ace has your heart, but TK has it too.” She squeezes my hand tighter before letting it go. “Don’t you run, girl.”

“It’s . . .” I stop, struggling to find the right words. “It’s complicated.”

“It always is,” she says before turning on a kitten heel, joining Ace, and disappearing into the house.

I get back into my car and drive to Saint Joseph Hospital, fighting not to let her words sink in. Knowing in my heart that, as much as I’ve enjoyed these last few months, the inevitable has finally arrived.



* * *



? ? ?

I HATE HOSPITALS.

Even the parking lots are filled with so much sadness it threatens to break me before I step foot inside.

I walk in the entrance, ignoring the gift shop and the front desk. Walking with blinders as families huddle together, talking in hushed voices about loved ones suffering, thinking of plans to move forward after their lives have been ripped to shreds. Probably from some freak accident they never saw coming, not in a million years.

Not me.

I knew. TK knew. Yet here we are because I was too afraid to make him choose.

Too afraid he wouldn’t choose me.

And now the decision’s been made for us.

I push the elevator button to the floor the trainer told me on the phone. I ignore the older couple standing next to me with a young girl wearing a shirt that says BIG SISTER in bright pink with a matching bow in her hair, hating myself for the resentment their happiness causes me. Furious I let myself dream of a future where Ace held a baby girl in his arms, staring into her matching green eyes.

I swipe at the tears falling uninvited as the doors slide open. I move down the hallway, trying not to think of the plans that will never happen and focusing only on what needs to be said.

I have the speech rehearsed when I reach TK’s room, but as soon as I pull open the curtain and catch sight of him, my mind goes blank.

He’s lying back, his eyes screwed shut in a way I know to mean he’s trying to fight pain and not sleeping. His big, strong body suddenly seems so small and frail in the hospital bed. His coloring is off and his hair is a knotted mess.

And he’s still the handsomest man I’ve ever set eyes on.

There’s a nurse in the room looking at the monitors next to his bed, then down to her iPad while she enters the information.

She notices me first.

“Can I help you?” She narrows her eyes, probably thinking I’m some rabid fan trying to get a piece of TK.

My mind, a swirling mess of chaos, doesn’t have an answer. Can she help me? Ha. Nobody can help me. Nobody.

“Hey, Sparks.” TK cracks his eyes open for a second but then groans in pain and screws them shut again.

My stomach twists.

I hate seeing him in pain, but I hate even more that I won’t be helping him through this.

“Hey,” I whisper.

I walk to the open side of his bed and ignore the annoyed eyes of the nurse while she finishes.

“If you need anything, the button for the nurses’ station is on the remote,” Nurse Bitchy tells TK, throwing one more nasty look my way before she leaves.

I want to reassure her I’ll be out of her way in no time, but I keep my mouth shut. She’ll find out soon enough.

“Where’s Ace?” TK asks after the nurse closes the curtain behind her, darkening the room again.

My hand is resting on the rail of his bed when he reaches out to grab it. His fingers graze my skin and just that small touch sends electricity through my veins. I pull away, stepping out of his reach before he can do it again.

“Mrs. Duncan is watching him.” I school my voice, keeping it even and unattached.

“What’s wrong with you?” TK asks with more than a small amount of anger in his voice.

“I can’t do this anymore.”

He blinks hard and jerks against the pillows supporting his head.

“I know.” He struggles to keep his eyes open even in the shadows of his room. “I told you one more game and this bullshit happened. I know I’m not gonna get you to come to more.”

“That’s not what I mean.” I want to go to him. My fingers are aching to touch his face and run through his hair, but I shove them in my back pockets and stay where I am. “I can’t do this anymore. You and me. It’s not going to work.”