Fueled(book two)(170)

I’m screwing this up. Maybe I need to listen to him. Give him the chance to explain. Maybe if I know the whole story it will help me push through this pain and move on once I hear all of the sordid details of his night with Tawny. And I think these details are exactly what I fear…but what if there are no sordid details? What if everything Haddie has been pushing into my ears is legitimate?

What if I’m in the wrong?

Crap. I am screwing this up. I can’t even think straight—thoughts fragmenting in a million directions—but I know I’m f*cking this up.

My cell phone chirps a text notification, and it drags me from my schizophrenic thoughts. It’s a text from Dane about Zander. I dial him immediately. “What’s wrong?” I ask in response to his greeting.

“He had a pretty rough night, Ry.” He blows out a loud sigh. “Actually talked about that night. It was his dad, Ry. And he swears that he saw his dad in his window last night. Freaked out. Literally. But Avery was in the room with him, and she said that there was no one there.”

“Oh God!” is all I can say, imagining the fear tearing through his little body.

“Yeah…Avery did a great job with him though. In fact, he hasn’t left her side all day.”

“Is he still talking?” My mind immediately thinks of all of the progress he’s made in the past month. Of how in therapy he’s started drawing pictures depicting what happened that horrific night and started piecing it together for both his counselors and the authorities. A set back like this could wipe all of that away and then some.

“Not as much but it’s still fresh in his mind. I’m just keeping Avery with him. The two of them have really bonded.”

“Do I need to come home? I can…” Guilt spirals through me. I should be there with Zander right now. Comforting him. Helping him through this. Holding him.

“Don’t be silly, Ry. We’ve got it covered. I just know how you like to know everything about the kids when it happens.”

“You’re sure?”

“Positive,” he reiterates. “How’s it going resisting the Adonis? Is the ship still sinking or are you diving into his bits of paradise?”

I can’t help the smile that forms on my lips. “You’ve been talking to Haddie, haven’t you?” His silence is the only answer that I need. Resigned and needing someone to bounce things off of, I reluctantly respond. “It’s…confusing.” I sigh.

“Men always are, babe.”

I laugh. “I don’t know, Dane. I know what I saw. I’m not stupid. But between Haddie telling me I’m being stubborn and Colton’s non-stop denial, I wonder if I’m making a mistake. I just don’t get how one plus one doesn’t equal two.”

He just makes a non-committal sound on the other end of the line while he thinks. “Shit, Ry, not everything is black and white if you know what I mean. What does it hurt to hear him out?”

I breathe out audibly, fear snaking through me that I really might be wrong. That I might already be too late. “My pride.”

“Sugar, maybe you should be holding on a little tighter to that Adonis instead of your pride. That’ll just cause you to end up alone with lots of cats.”

A silence settles between us, his words striking a little closer to home than I care to admit. “Yeah…I know.”

“Then get off your ass and do something about it! A gorgeous man like that isn’t going to wait around forever regardless of how delicious you are. Shit, I just might try to turn him.”