Forgiving Nancy (Last Hangman MC, #5)(79)
The drive takes us about four hours and Callum joined halfway through the journey.
I can’t say it was an easy ride there. My mind was swirling with f*cked up thoughts of everything that’s happened over the past five years. I don’t know why I do it to myself sometimes. I just sit there and let myself think of everything in great detail. Luckily Bennett is always there for me when I start. He knows absolutely everything that’s happened, we’ve talked about it a few more times and I hated every single second of it, but he said he needed it to completely understand the hell I was in. I don’t know which was worse, having to relive it all or seeing the look of horror on his face.
I’ve also been trying to imagine what my reaction will be when I see my name on the headstone. I’ve only seen it in pictures and it’s incredibly creepy, I’m not sure if seeing it in person is going to be any better, but I have to do it and destroy this last piece of my old life.
We park outside of the cemetery and gather around the back of Bennett’s truck.
“Are you sure you’re ready?” Callum asks.
“Yes.” I look between Bennett and Callum and they both nod at me. Bennett grabs a sledgehammer from the back of his truck and we make our way into the cemetery.
It’s almost dark already, which makes this place seem even creepier. I hate cemeteries and knowing my name is engraved in stone somewhere doesn’t help. We walk around for a few minutes before we spot it and a wave of emotion overcomes me.
I stare at this headstone for a couple of minutes, feeling frozen. It’s a big marble stone, looking as if my parents were trying to show off by getting a big one.
I don’t know what hurts the most. The fact that my parents buried me, or that they put up a message that is unlike them. On the headstone, engraved, these words can be read: Treasured Memories of Our Beloved Daughter
Nancy Elizabeth Larkins
June 10, 1993 – August 16, 2015
Gone to Sleep on this Earth
To Wake Again in Heaven.
Deep in our Hearts you will Always stay Loved and Remembered, Every day.
I turn to Bennett and take the sledgehammer he hands me. I take one last glance of the headstone and walks to the side of it. I take a deep breath and swing the sledgehammer as hard as I can into the headstone. It’s not breaking it as dramatically as I have hoped it would, but at least a few of the letters have now disappeared. I look at it and drive the sledgehammer into it over and over again. I’m hoping to shatter this piece of shit, but the stone isn’t giving and I’m not strong enough. Tears fall freely down my face and I’m an emotional mess. So many thoughts are running through my mind, should I have died? Would things have been different for everybody? Should I have stayed away from Bennett altogether? How would my life had turned out? What would have happened if I left with Bennett before the end of the school year? Would we still be together and happy? So many questions getting mixed up in my head.
I jump when I feel a strong hand on my shoulder. I turn around and find myself looking into Bennett’s eyes. There’s a sadness in his eyes, mirroring mine. I don’t know if he’s sad for me, seeing me in such a state or if it’s pity that I’m such a mess. Probably the first one.
“Give me that,” he says softly and moves me backwards. He takes my place on the right of the headstone and I see Callum on the left of it. I take a few steps back and stand in front of the headstone. Both of them look at each other and nod before swinging their sledgehammers. I have no idea when Callum got his, but it did the trick. A sob escapes me as I watch the dust and pieces of rock fly into the air. They repeat the process three more times and with each blow to the stone, I feel the chains my parents had me trapped in all those years being broken. With the last blow, a wave of relief and freedom washes over me and I fall to my knees and burst into tears. I cry for the teenage girl who never got to experience a normal life with loving parents; for the girls she left behind; for Bennett and the hell he’s been put through and for all those moments we were robbed of.
As I’m still crouched down, I feel two strong arms wrap around me; to my right is Bennett and Callum stands on my left. The two constants in my life, without who I wouldn’t even be here I’ll forever be grateful for all they’ve done for me, both knowingly and unknowingly.
I place my hands on their knees, squeezing a silent thank you for their support. We stay like this for a couple of minutes before leaving in silence.
“Uh guys? We probably should run,” Callum suddenly says.
“Why?” Just as I get the word out, I hear people shouting. We turn around and we see the cemetery caretaker accompanied by cops.
“Run!” Bennett shouts and sprint to where we parked. Me and Bennett jump into his car and Callum onto his bike and we speed away. I don’t know if they’ll follow us or if we’ll get into trouble, but right now I really couldn’t care less. I finally managed to do something I’ve wanted to do for so long and it feels so liberating. I feel free.
CHAPTER 34
Bennett
If you had told me that Nancy would be taken from me five years ago, that my brother would be the one behind it, I would never have believed you. Nor did I expect to be shot once again. It’s starting to become a very painful habit. Some day, I don’t know how Nancy manages to handle me and my personality but I’m so glad she does. She’s been there with me since she got back but most importantly, since the whole f*cked up mess with Richard happened. I can’t even call him my brother. The only brothers I have are my MC ones.