Feels Like Summertime(34)

“It’s okay, Jake. You can kiss my forehead. Or my cheek. You can touch my belly. It’s all right. I promise.”

“It’s not all right,” he complains. “You are not mine. You’re someone else’s. I keep forgetting that.” He quietly tosses his line in the water and stares hard at his bobber.

“I’m not anybody’s, Jake. Not anymore.”

His head jerks up. “What?”

“It’s kind of hard to explain.”

He hands me a fishing pole. “Start at the beginning. How did you meet your husband?”

“Oh, that’s easy to explain.” I let out a breath. “I met Jeff at basic, right after I joined the military.”

“Love at first sight, right?” His green eyes don’t meet mine.

I rock my head back and forth like I’m thinking about it. But I don’t need to think hard. “Pretty much. Then we got pregnant right away. With Gabby.”

He just sits staring silently ahead.

“We haven’t seen one another in eighteen years, Jake. You can’t fault me for falling in love with my husband.”

He nods. “I know. I just wonder what might have happened between us if we’d never stopped writing to one another. If we hadn’t let that fizzle out, where would we be now?”

“There’s no way to know that.” I set my pole on the dock next to me and squeeze my hands together. “Even if I could, I wouldn’t take it back. I loved him. The way I felt for my husband eclipsed what we had at sixteen. That was puppy love compared to what it feels like making a family with someone.”

He grunts.

“You loved Laura, right?”

He finally meets my eyes. “What I feel for you right now eclipses what I ever felt for her.”

My belly drops down toward my toes. “You don’t mean that.”

“It’s stupid, I know.”

I lay a hand on his knee, which is jumping in place. “It’s not stupid. It’s just not real, either.”

“It’s real,” he says.

“Okay…” I say slowly.

“Let’s fish,” Jake says. “I don’t want to talk anymore.”

“I’m going to beat the pants off you, Jake,” I tease.

He grins. “You want my pants off, Katie, you just let me know. You don’t have to outfish me for that.”

I can’t hold back my grin. “You suck.”

Jake bumps my shoulder gently with his. “I’m glad you’re here,” he says.

“Me too.”





30





Katie





A note stuck to the door lets me know that Dad and Adam have taken the little kids to the store to get baby supplies and food.



Katie,

You have no diapers, no baby clothes, and almost no food. We’re going to buy out the store. Back later.

Adam

PS. We took two good-looking kids with us. And a dog.





Jake waves at me from his perch on the golf cart. “Everything okay?”

I hold up the note. “My parents took the two little kids to the store. They’ll be back soon. I think I might take a nap.” I yawn into my fist. I am tired and my back is killing me.

“Sleep well,” he calls, and then he drives away.

I let myself into the cabin. I haven’t locked the door since we got here. But the moment I step inside, I freeze.

The afghan that’s usually flung haphazardly across the back of the couch is now folded neatly. And the games are all stacked on the table, all with their names facing out, in alphabetical order. The dishes that were in the sink have been washed and put away. And I bet that if I look in the bathroom, all the towels are folded in thirds on the shelf.

My heart gallops in my chest. I turn to run back out the door, but a big body steps out from behind the door, slamming it before I can get out.

“Hi, Katie,” he says.

I take two steps back. “Cole, what are you doing here?”

“Is that how you greet the father of your child, Katie?” he asks. He steps toward me and I force myself to hold my ground, even though I really want to throw up. “It’s nice to see you looking so healthy and relaxed.”

“How did you f-find me?” My voice betrays me with a slight warble, so I clear my throat.

“I followed your dads,” he says. He shrugs. “It was pretty easy.” He takes my chin in his palm and tries to force me to meet his eyes. I look everywhere but at him, until he squeezes my chin so hard it hurts. “I can’t believe you thought you could go without leaving me a forwarding address.”

“I just needed some time–”

“Time’s up,” he says, clapping his hands in my face. “It’s time to go home. I already packed your things.”

A pain clenches across my belly. “What about the kids?”

“I packed their things too.”

I close my eyes tightly.

“What’s the matter, Katie?” he taunts. “Aren’t you glad to see me?”

I step back and he lets me go. I feel like a mouse caught in a maze. No matter where or how I turn, he’ll catch me. I’m certain of that.