Fame, Fate, and the First Kiss(49)

“Because I need to stay focused. I have a career to develop.”

“And kissing a boy you like is going to somehow ruin this?”

“It’s the liking part I’m worried about. That’s just going to distract me, get in my head. I’ve never really had the need to like anyone before. Freshman year, I was kissing Hayden in Guys and Dolls. He was a great kisser. Need satisfied. Sophomore year it was Ryan in The King and I. Junior year there was Brady in Some Like It Hot.”

“Okay, I get it. So what you’re saying is that your pattern of kissing costars has gotten you to where you are and you’re worried to disrupt the pattern?”

“Something like that.”

“So it needs to be: senior year, kissing Grant James in Dancing Graves? Need satisfied?”

“That sounds pathetic.”

“It does,” she agreed. “And I just realized something.”

“What?”

“You’ve never really been kissed. That’s so sad.”

“Yes, I have, I just told you about all of them.”

“You just told me your only kisses have been scripted. Lacey, you have no idea how much different it is off script. You need a real kiss. Your first real kiss. Seriously, it’s so much better. You will never want to stop.”

“You do realize you’re not helping. That’s exactly what I’m worried about. That this will completely derail me. Do you know my mom quit college for my dad? They had to move for his grad school, and she didn’t want to be left behind. And she never finished.”

“And she regrets this every day of her life?”

“They got divorced. She quit something important for a love that failed. I’m sure she regrets it.”

Amanda put her hand on my arm. “You can’t think of love like that. You have to think about everything you gain while it lasts. I’m not saying to quit acting. I’m just saying, you think it will dilute your abilities, distract you. What I’m telling you is having those feelings that come with a relationship—love, anger, heartache, longing—will only heighten your abilities. I promise.”

I opened my mouth to disagree with her when I realized that I had already proved her right. Just today on set, I had imagined Donavan and how I felt about him, and it had made for the best scene ever. “He doesn’t like me back though,” is what I ended up saying.

“I doubt that.”

“He doesn’t date actresses.”

“What? Why?”

“He reviews movies and wants to be able to stay objective.”

“Oh, please. That’s a ridiculous excuse. One you can easily talk your way past, especially because he likes you. He wants to be talked into this. Believe me. You have to convince him that actresses are just like everyone else. So? Will you give this a chance?”

“Maybe . . .” I wanted to scream yes but had at least a little bit of self-control left.

She stood with determination. “Then let’s go talk him into it. Where is he right now?”

A nervous volcano erupted in my stomach as she headed to the door without waiting for an answer.





Twenty-Two


“Do you two really think I can go out somewhere in this town without causing a scene?” Grant stood at his open trailer door, where Amanda was trying to convince him to come with us to the restaurant where Donavan worked.

“He’s right. His fan club will find him,” I said. I was nervous enough showing up to Donavan’s restaurant without Grant in tow, but Amanda had insisted that it would look more casual if all of us went together, just some coworkers out for a quick bite to eat.

Amanda wasn’t taking no for an answer. “What about Lacey’s car, a small restaurant, a waiter we know, and a hat and sunglasses?”

“That sounded like you just solved the murder in a game of Clue,” I said.

Grant stretched. “Why not?” He must not have really cared about causing a scene, because I didn’t think this plan would actually work. But I didn’t care if people recognized Grant. My whole body was terrified with the thought of seeing Donavan, with the plan of telling him how I felt.

“I thought you had the sunglasses and hat,” Grant said when we pulled up outside the restaurant. He was in the back seat, where he had been lying down almost the entire time.

“I was just making a suggestion. I thought you’d bring them.” Amanda pointed to the seat next to him. “Put on Lacey’s hoodie.”

“And I have some sunglasses,” I said, picking them up from the center console.

“Nice,” he said, putting them both on. My hoodie was too small on him, and the sleeves rode up his arms. I sucked in my lips to keep from laughing. Amanda and I walked on either side of him up the sidewalk to the restaurant.

My phone buzzed in my pocket, and I ignored it at first. Then it buzzed three more times. I pulled it out to see a string of notifications down the screen. Amanda reached for the door of the restaurant, but I stopped.

“What is it?” she asked.

“Some article. I’ve been tagged in some online article, I guess.”

“Let’s read it inside.”

I nodded and followed her and Grant in. It was a Saturday but still pretty early, so it wasn’t too busy. Plus it was a pretty small restaurant.