Faith & the Dead End Devils (Sweet Omegaverse, #8)(69)

"He and I were… I can't even call it fuck buddies, because we weren't friends," he said, glaring up at me, even as his thumbs stroked my inner thighs. "You didn't break up a love story, Faith. You gave me a reason to walk out of a shitty situation."

"Did he hurt you?" I asked, wondering if I was capable of tearing the alpha limb from limb.

"He used me. I used him. Maybe it could've been something more, but it wasn't," Chance said. "He never hurt me. He liked… Don't tell anyone this. I dunno why I'm being loyal to him, but he liked me talking down to him, pushing him around. Being rough. It was like we switched designations when we were alone."

I sighed and fell forward, my heart breaking at the idea that Chance saw being a beta as being talked down to and pushed around by alphas. Chance's arms reached up, circling my back, the pair of us holding one another.

"He still wants you," I said. It'd been obvious the night before.

Chance grunted.

"Do you still want him?" I asked, trying to sound calm and not make it super obvious that I would go hunt Ghost down and tear his throat out if Chance said yes.

"I meant what I said, birdy," Chance murmured, stroking my back. "I… You know my brother is an alpha."

I blinked, tried to sit up, but Chance held me fast to his chest.

"Same alpha dad, same beta mom. Rider got my dad's alpha gene, and I didn't," Chance said. "And I wasn't the only one disappointed. My dad took it…personally. And Rider thought it was fuckin’ funny. He'd always be on top where we were concerned. Always stronger than me, better."

"I don't believe that for a second," I said.

Chance ignored me. "Ghost set my temper off one day. We fought, and…he fucking loved it. Liked me chewing him out, throwing him to the ground, and it escalated at first. I thought I was really going to beat the shit out of this alpha, feel powerful. And then he kissed me, and the whole thing just…went sideways into fucking. But I still felt powerful.

"He didn't want to put me down in my place in the dirt, like Rider and the others. He wanted me to put him there, and…so did I." Chance's arms loosened enough for me to push up on my hands and study his scowl. "I was high on that. I'd never felt like an alpha's equal. Or their superior. It was clear from the start that was just private for him. He acts like the rest of them, fucks all the beta club ass—"

"Rude name," I said, and Chance's smile flickered out.

"Ignored me when we were around the others," he continued.

"Blind idiots."

He grinned up at me and sighed. "He kept showing up. I kept chasing the high, craving it. Until one day, a little omega in a closet held onto my wrist like she needed me."

"I do need you," I said, jutting my chin out.

"I know," Chance said, smile bright, all relaxed again.

He was moody, shifting his expression like changing winds, but I knew how to make the sun part the clouds and the reward was divine. Chance shone when he smiled.

He pushed himself up on his elbows until our faces were inches apart, eyes bouncing back and forth over mine. "I can't decide if you make me feel like an alpha, or like it doesn't matter either way."

"It doesn't matter. You're as important to me as Bear," I said, brushing silky strands of hair back from his face.

"I know," he said again, stretching up to steal a kiss.

But he hadn't answered my original question, and I sat up, just out of reach. "Do you still want him?"

Chance froze, blinking at me.

"I want you and Bear…and King. And I haven't had…almost any opportunities for relationships, but I know feelings don't just evaporate," I said.

"Part of me does," Chance admitted in a rush. He sighed and sagged, collapsing beneath me. "Physically. But the idea leaves a bad taste in my mouth. What he offers isn't enough now."

"Good, you deserve better," I said.

Chance arched an eyebrow. "You deserve a pack who's beating down the door to be yours, thinking of courting presents, like Bear said."

King…

"I come with a lot of baggage," I said, shrugging.

"No, birdy. You're being chased by a lot of horrible people, and you've been treated cruelly up until now. That's not your fault. King needs to—"

"I don't want to talk about King," I said, pressing my palms on Chance's shoulders, staring sternly at him. "You meant what you said last night? You're mine?"

Chance searched my face for a beat, then nodded slowly. "I'm yours, birdy."

I dipped down briefly to nip at his lips and then sat up again. "Good. Then make me yours."

Chance's brow furrowed. "Make you—I can't—"

"You can. However you want," I said, hovering over him.

Chance stared up at me, but I smiled as I watched the ideas pass over his face, flickering in his eyebrows, twitching his lips. His hands slid down to my hips and I wiggled on his lap, bouncing my eyebrows at the same time.

"That's a good start," I said.

Chance's eyes narrowed. "You've got those alphas wrapped around your pinkie finger, and you think you can lead me around on a leash too, don't you?"