Ever After (East Raven Academy Book 1)(29)

“Then who is it?” she asks.

“I’m not ready to tell you, yet,” I say, grinning cryptically at her.

“Uh,” she says. “Phoenix, you are going to drive me crazy.”

“And I am going to enjoy every second of it,” I say.

She throws a pillow at me, but misses by a few feet. I just laugh, thinking that I couldn’t have been roomed with anybody better than Teagan.

“What about you?” I ask. “You’ve never told me who this mysterious guy is that you’ve been crushing on.”

“Okay, I see your point,” she says. “But this guy I’m crushing on doesn’t even know I exist. The guy you’re crushing on basically asked you on a date. If the guy I liked asked me on a date, I would be shouting it from the rooftops.”

She wouldn’t if he went to West Raven Academy. Which Brooks definitely does, so... for now, it’s my little secret.





Thursday, August 24

I’m not okay.





At lunch on Thursday, I sit down at a spot on the opposite side of Estaine.

I’m not sure what is worse, sitting beside him or directly in front of him. At least, when I sat beside him I could avoid looking at him. Now, he’s right in front of my face, and he’s looking at me. I can’t help but feel extremely guilty when I see him.

“Hey, Phoenix,” Estaine says to me.

“Hey,” I say, not looking him directly in the eye. Instead, I focus on his hair, loving how curly his dark hair is.

Estaine is a very attractive guy. I don’t understand why he doesn’t have a girlfriend. It’s not that girls here don’t like him, I know they do. Girls always try to flirt with him, but he just doesn’t seem to care, which only makes them try harder.

I wonder about his past girlfriends. He talked about one girl he dated, who no longer goes here, but that was two years ago. Who else has he dated at East Raven? What is his type?

Why do I even care?

“Can we talk?” he asks. “After school?”

“I’ve got soccer practice,” I say, thankful for an excuse.

“I have football practice,” he says. “I meant after that.”

“Maybe,” I say. “I have to call my uncle.”

Actually, I’ll probably talk to Jake, not Uncle Matty. And I’ll go in person. That way, if Jake says no, I can start crying. He will feel bad and he’ll have to let me go. At least, I hope that’s the case.

Teagan, who is talking to Emma, turns to look at me. She probably is listening to our conversation, but I ignore her watchful glance.

“After that,” Estaine says.

I am out of excuses.

Crap.

“Okay,” I say, nodding once. “I’ll come to your dorm after dinner.”

Still, I will try to find a way out of it.

“Sounds good,” Estaine says, smiling at me. “So, how is your cousin?”

At first, I’m confused. I hope it doesn’t show on my face, but Estaine is observant. It wouldn’t surprise me if he’d caught me in yet another lie.

“Jake is good,” I answer. “A little sore, but he’s going to be fine.”

“That’s good,” Estaine says, never taking his eyes off me. “You were pretty freaked out yesterday.”

“Well, I didn’t know everything was okay yesterday, when I got that text from my uncle,” I say.

“Yeah,” he says, still watching me.

He doesn’t trust me.

I don’t blame him, because I wouldn’t trust me if I were him.

Estaine thinks I’m a liar.

He’s right.

I hate that he’s right.

Before coming here, I hardly ever lied. I would say that I never lied, but there were occasions that I lied. Like, when my mom asked me if her hips looked big in that one pencil skirt. They did look big, but I couldn’t tell my mom that. I still cringe when I see her wearing that ugly skirt. I should burn it.

But now, I am a liar. A pathological liar. And I know that I have to lie. I know I shouldn’t feel guilty. But I do. I so do. I push away my food, not able to eat another bite. My stomach is so full of guilt and misery that there is no room for these delicious tacos.

“You okay?” Estaine asks.

I nod. Once. It’s another lie. I’m not okay.

When I was kidnapped, it didn’t affect me. I mean, it scared me, but my life was pretty much the same, aside from the added bodyguards. But then the girl from my school died. And it upset me. When I came here, I didn’t want to come, but I realized it was a fresh start. I was excited about the fresh start. I thought the terrorists would eventually forget about me. But after what happened in Texas, I am a bit shaken up. What if they do come after me here? What if they somehow find me? And my friends.

The terrorist aren’t just after me. They’re after my dad and stepmom, too. They have taken a lot of precautions for their safety. I wish I could be there with them, but I understand why I can’t. My dad is worried about me and he wants me to be somewhere safe in case the terrorists do manage to get to him.

“Did you guys hear that a terrorist group attacked a school in Texas yesterday?” Teagan asks.

I nod, but nobody else seems to have heard.