Ensnared (Knights of Brethren #3)(53)

Even so, the April night was cold, and he was barely clothed. How had he survived the winters without freezing?

I shrugged out of my cloak and handed it to Sven. It wasn’t thick or necessarily even warm. But it would provide a measure of decency until we found suitable garments for him.

He took the cloak and bowed his head. “Thank you, lady.”

“I’m no more than a bondservant in the earl’s house, my lord.”

Sven met my gaze solemnly. “Never have I met a truer or braver lady than you.”

If only he knew the truth, that I wasn’t very brave and had allowed grievous things to happen to others. As much as I’d wanted to change the circumstances, I’d let helplessness hold me back. “I haven’t been very brave before tonight.”

“Neither have I.” Sven wrapped the cloak around his torso and pulled the hood up. “But I believe one act of courage has the power to clear the path for more.”

At the lights and the sound of voices coming from the side castle door, I knew I needed to put some distance between myself and Gunnar before anyone saw us together. But instead of letting me get away, Gunnar grasped my hand again and laced his fingers through mine, drawing me against his arm so that we were standing side by side.

“Kirstin was waiting when I came out.” Gunnar narrowed his eyes upon the group coming our way. “I sent her to fetch Valter and the physician. But ’twould appear she’s bringing half the castle with her.”

The darkness obscured their faces, but from the tightening of Gunnar’s muscles, I guessed Bernhard was among those coming down to greet us. What would he say about me going in after Frans? And what would he do when he discovered Sven’s identity?

I attempted to pull my hand from Gunnar’s.

He didn’t release me.

“Please, Gunnar,” I whispered. “We cannot let Bernhard see us together.”

“I have cowered before my brother’s bullying for too many years. It’s past time that I stand up to him and stand up for myself.”

I was tired of living in fear of Bernhard too. But in spite of the courage I’d just shown in the forest with the jotunn, my old fears crowded in, pushing aside the inspiration from Sven from moments ago.

Gunnar spun me to face him, and for the first time since the horror of the night began hours ago, I allowed myself to feast upon him in all his flawless beauty—his hair falling over his forehead, his high cheekbones, his full lips, and his eyes framed with long lashes. He was not only an incredible man on the outside, but he was equally as beautiful on the inside. Tonight, he’d shown himself to be the hero and daring knight who had earned a place among the Knights of Brethren.

If I’d ever doubted I could love him, those doubts were gone. I loved him beyond my wildest imagination. But that didn’t erase my fear of what Bernhard would do once he learned of Gunnar’s interest in me. I didn’t want to put Gunnar or my family into jeopardy.

“I love you, Mikaela.” Gunnar brushed a strand of hair away from my face and tucked it behind my ear. “When I wasn’t sure if you’d make it out of the forest, I decided I don’t want to wait for you any longer. I want to be together. Now and forever.”

His declaration wound through me, tying my insides into dozens of knots that only he would ever be able to unravel. I was bound to him, but due to our circumstances, we didn’t have the liberty to make our feelings for one another public yet.

I wanted to reach up and brush his hair back the same way he had with mine, but I forced my hand to remain at my side. “We need to find a way to keep you and my family safe first.”

“I’ve let Bernhard dictate my actions for too long already. I can no longer pretend to be someone I am not around him. I must start being true to myself no matter the consequences.”

I couldn’t repress a shudder.

He rubbed my arms up and down. Without my cloak and now that I was no longer running, my body was feeling the effects of the frigid air. The friction of his hands over my sleeves should have warmed me a little, but I couldn’t shake the coldness settling deep inside.

The voices drew nearer. With Sven still holding the torch, it served to illuminate Gunnar and me so that those coming down the path and crossing the grassy field could see us together.

“I have to do this,” he said quietly, “so that I can learn to fight for what’s right both on and off the battlefield. If I don’t, I’ll never be the man you deserve.”

Gunnar, like the rest of the Knights of Brethren, was renowned for his fighting skills and his fierceness in battle. But he’d never stood up to his brother before. And perhaps doing so would take the most courage of all.

“I won’t let Bernhard harm you or your kin,” he insisted. “I vow it.”

I swallowed the fear rising into my throat. If Gunnar was willing to make a stand for what was right, then it was time for me to do so too.

I lifted to my toes and kissed his cheek. “I love you.”





Chapter

25





Gunnar


She loved me. She’d said it.

Even though I’d longed to hear her declaration of love, had hoped she felt the same way I did, I hadn’t wanted to pressure her into saying it before she was ready.

Even now as she peered up at me, her ever-changing brown eyes radiated her love. She’d given up hiding it and was ready to embrace our future together no matter what difficulties would come our way.