Endless Knight(101)

I sat up and touched his shoulder, but he flinched. “Aric, please. For whatever reason, can we take this more slowly?”


“Do you deny it?” Jealousy emanated from him in waves.

“I’m not saying that I don’t want something with you. But I made a promise to him. You said I didn’t keep them in the past, but I do now. I owe him at least one conversation about all this, before I decide to take things further with you.”


“I told you how he wronged you, and still you want him!”


“I could say the same about your feelings for me.”


With a brusque sound of annoyance, he rose to dress. “I thought you were past this. Past him.”


So had I. My life flashing before my eyes seemed to have jarred something loose. “Do you want me to always wonder about him? Don’t you want to start things clean with me?”


He yanked on his pants. “Damn you, Empress, you will choose me! You must. He can move on. I cannot!”


I thought back over Jack’s behavior, not certain at all that he could move on. à moi, Evangeline!

Pacing the room, Aric said, “You never gave your heart before. I was convinced you didn’t have one.”


I pulled the sheet over my chest. “I do, and right now it’s breaking in two.”


“Why is it that the first time I’ve vowed retribution against you, it’s the one time you were born like this? With honor and empathy? The sole time you are perfect for me—and you’re in love with another man!”


I whispered, “I’m so sorry.”


“After the Flash, if I’d gone to Haven and protected you and your mother, would you have chosen me to love?”


Before being on the road with Jack? Before learning what a complicated boy he was? Before he’d saved my life? I had to answer honestly. “Yes.”


Aric yelled with frustration, launching his fist into the stone wall. The entire turret rocked. Between heaving breaths, he grated, “I should have gone to you! I should have looked past my hatred and protected you.”


He didn’t say instead of terrorizing you, but I knew we were both thinking it.

“We can’t change that now.”


“No, we can’t. I’ve been patient with you. I’ve stretched the limits of even my eternal patience. I see now that the mortal must be taken out of the equation.”


As Matthew had said. In a tone like ice, I said, “If you hurt Jack, whatever this is between us will end. Do you want us to be enemies once more?” My claws began to turn.

He noticed, scowling. “No, I do not.”


“You should feel grateful toward him. If it weren’t for Jack, I would’ve been captured by the Lovers, tortured and killed.” Saying this out loud only cemented my decision to go to him. He’d saved my life; I owed him a conversation.

“If you have feelings for him, fight them,” Aric commanded me. “By going to him, you’d be stoking them once more. Don’t you understand? He can find another woman—I cannot. If you choose him, you’ll be consigning me to a hellish fate. As you’ve done again and again. No, this will be even worse, because I’ve had a greater glimpse of what I’ll be missing.”


“I just want to talk to him. I’m leaving this weekend,” I said in an unwavering voice.

“No, you will not.” His arrogant demeanor back in place, he said, “Understand me, I’m not surrendering the one woman who was born for me alone. Not to a human, not to anyone.”


“You can’t keep me here against my will any longer. What are you going to do? Put that cuff back on me?”


“I regret that—”


I held up my hand to stop him. “I understand why you did it. But I won’t be a prisoner anymore.”


He snatched up his shirt, threading his arms into the sleeves. “You say you keep your promises now? You made a vow before gods to be my wife. In this life, you will keep your promises to me—before you ever honor one to him!”


“You can’t stop me from leaving. I have my powers back. I earned my powers back.”


With a cruel curve of his lips, he said, “You promised never to harm me, Empress. Know that you’ll have to kill me before I would ever let you go.”


As he strode out the door, I said, “And know that you’ll have to put that cilice on me to keep me prisoner again.”


Alone, I called for Matthew.

—Empress lived today.—


Was there doubt on that score?

—A battle that fraught. So many tree limbs. Eddies.—


His way of saying he couldn’t always see the thousands of ways a fate could unfold. You still sound upset, Matthew. Confused. Too much so? I need to talk to Jack. If I leave this place, can you get me back to you?

—The Fool guides your way. . . .—


45


DAY 369 A.F.

Lark was asleep in her new room, looking so young, with her mammal sleep pile dozing in the bed all around her.

Two days ago, the medic had given her an air cast for her broken forearm, another for her snapped ankle, and a sling for her busted collarbone. Then he’d confined her to bed rest.