Eleanor & Grey(65)

“You need to leave,” he scolded, taking a few steps toward me.

“No,” I bellowed, standing tall, as I stepped toward him. Chest puffed out. Head held high. I hoped he didn’t see the small tremble in my body. It was no secret that he made me nervous. He was so cold and hard that I never knew how close he was to snapping, and that was scary. Still, I wouldn’t back down, because Lorelai needed me. She needed someone to stand up for her, seeing how she couldn’t do it for herself. So, I planted my feet hard on the floor and stood my ground. “Your daughter is crying in the other room because you didn’t even take the time to notice her artwork.”

“Is that all, Eleanor? Because if you are finished I need to get back to work.”

“Not everything in life is about work,” I scolded.

“Maybe not for you, but it is for me.”

“You didn’t want to be him,” I told him, shaking my head in disbelief. “All your life, you didn’t want to be like your father.”

“My father was a hardworking man. I was a child who didn’t know the sacrifices he made to run this company in order to provide for his family.”

“That’s a lie.”

“Eleanor, stop,” he said, almost as if he were begging me to back down because I was tapping into sensitive territory, but I couldn’t do it. I was going to push him. I was going to keep pushing until he woke up from this deep somber he was in. I was going to keep shoving him with my words until reality hit him.

“Your father abandoned you,” I told him. “He walked away, just like your mother, and they left you alone.”

“Eleanor.” His voice was low, and his eyes were intense. I was doing it. I was getting under his skin, and I wasn’t going to stop.

“You told me repeatedly how alone you felt after your grandfather died. You told me time and time again how you hated sitting in your house, because there was no one there for you. Greyson, this isn’t you. This isn’t the person you wanted to become. This isn’t who you are supposed to be.”

“You don’t know me,” he barked, his face turning redder and redder each second that past. “You don’t know who I’ve become.”

“Yes, but I do know who you were,” I promised. “And I can still see that boy in those eyes sometimes, fighting like hell to come back to life.”

“You don’t know anything,” he argued.

“I know you miss your wife.”

His jaw went slack, and he narrowed his eyes. That hit him hard. Those cold, gray eyes… “You should stop speaking.”

“Yes, you’re right, I should, but I won’t because I get it. I know you miss her, Greyson, and I know when you look at your daughters, you see so many parts of her in their eyes, and that has to be hard. I’m sure sometimes it feels as if grief is swallowing you whole, but you can’t allow it to consume you. You have two beautiful daughters who are looking toward you for guidance and love, and the last thing they need is this, this monster version of you that randomly shows up and rocks their world sideways.”

Even though my voice trembled, I stood tall before Greyson. I knew this wasn’t him, this ghost of a man. Sure, we’d missed a few years, but deep down inside of his darkness was the boy I’d once loved so much, the gentle boy, the kind boy, the boy who’d saved me.

I had to believe my Grey still lived inside of this man. Otherwise, the world was lost.

“Well, aren’t you a know-it-all,” he sarcastically remarked.

“No, but I know enough.”

He huffed at my words, obviously irritated that I had the nerve to speak to him in such a manner. “Then, please, Eleanor, do tell me. It seems you have been sent to me to tell me about all my faults. You’re here to throw your truths into my face about me and my family, so tell me! Tell me what it is that my children need?!”

“Their father!” I cried, my voice cracking as I marched toward him. I still wasn’t backing down, which somewhat surprised me. Maybe because this felt personal. Maybe it was because I knew what it felt like to be those girls, because all the words I’d never yelled at my father were now pouring out of my soul. So, I couldn’t back down, because my heart was pounding too hard in my chest. I couldn’t back down, because my soul knew how important it was to help Greyson find his way home. We were face-to-face, his breaths heavy with annoyance, my chest puffing in and out from my irritation at him being so shut off. His hot exhalations hissed against my skin, and each time he blinked, I waited for his stare to return to mine.

There was such a heavy tension in the space. Each inhale felt harder than the last, and my heartrate never took the time to slow down. I would’ve kept the intensity going, too, if it wasn’t for one small thing.

Every so often, he’d blink, and he’d look absolutely shattered. As if every single piece of his soul was being set on fire.

Out of all of the emotions that sat within Greyson the one that shone through the most was his exhaustion. He seemed on the brink of exhaustion as he looked at me.

For the first time since I stormed into his office, I studied his face; the curves, the creases, the lines.

His lips…the way they turned upside down into sadness.

His eyes...the way they told the history of his past.

I backed down.