Drop Dead Sexy(10)

At the mention of my brother and me procreating, my mother’s dark blue eyes sparkled with pleasure. “Okay, so maybe I’m dying for a grandbaby…or three,” she replied, with a giggle.

“If it makes you feel better, I’ve been toying with the idea of having my eggs frozen. You know, to be able to use later on in case the man doesn’t show up.”

My mother’s happiness instantly evaporated. “That’s not what I had in mind.”

Pease poked my mom’s leg with her cane. “What about that, Maureen? You can start telling everyone you’re expecting a grandbaby as soon as it thaws out.”

Mama rolled her eyes. “Excuse me that I don’t get excited over the prospect of a grandcicle.”

Pease chortled. “As much as Allen dips his wick with stray ass, you’ll be a grandmother before you know it.” When both Mama and I shot her a horrified look, Pease shrugged. “It’s the truth.”

“I don’t even want to ask how you know about Allen’s love life,” Mama said.

With a wink, Pease replied, “I never reveal my sources.”

“Thank God,” I murmured, which earned me a whack on the knee from Pease’s cane.

“Ow!”

“I’d pay good money if my sources had anything juicy to reveal on you,” she harrumphed.

“Leave Olivia alone, Eloise,” Mama warned.

Pease leaned in on her cane. “I’m just stating facts about Olivia’s lack of a love life.”

I pinched the bridge of my nose as a headache began to form. I began to repeat Do not bitch slap your grandmother. Do not bitch slap your grandmother in my head. “I need some Advil,” I said, rising to my feet.

“Oh, don’t be such a candy ass, Livvie. You know I was only teasing,” Pease called as I started back to the bedroom where the coats and purses were.

Resisting the urge to shoot her a bird, I chose the high road instead and ignored her. As I started in the bedroom, Jill was shrugging into her coat. “Are you leaving?”

“Yeah, I better hit the road if I’m going to make it back in time to meet Chase.”

“I think I’ll follow you out.”

My words sent her hips gyrating into some epic pelvic thrusts. “Ooh, yeah baby, Livvie’s gonna get her some.”

“Shh!” I hissed as I threw a panicked glance over my shoulder to make sure Mama or Pease hadn’t followed me.

“Any ideas where you’re going to go?”

“I was thinking about doing a Google search. See if anything is around here.”

“Well, good luck on that one.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“It’s just I didn’t notice anything on the drive up here.”

“It’s been my experience that no matter how backwoods a place is, there is always a watering hole somewhere.”

“Let’s just hope at this ‘watering hole’, as you call it, there’s a moderately decent looking guy with a working cock.”

I grinned. “Fingers crossed.”





After leaving Mama’s shower, I pulled over at a Texaco station about a mile from the cabin. It wasn’t for gas but to change into my sexy attire to hit a bar. Jill had deemed my wardrobe “too matronly”, so she had promised to bring me a dress from her closet to the shower. And hot damn, Jill had really come through for me on a flaming red dress with spaghetti straps that hit mid-thigh. I loved the heels the most with their crisscrossing rhinestone straps.

I realized I’d made a serious mistake with my choice when after finding the outside bathroom locked, I was given the key, which was attached to a toilet seat lid. “Please tell me I’m not supposed to use this on the commode?” I questioned.

The attendant rolled her eyes. “It’s to keep people from running off with the key.”

Considering how the woman looked like she wanted to bitch-slap me, I refrained from saying, “Who in their right mind would want to hang on to it?”

Instead, I thanked her and headed back outside. Once I stepped into the bathroom, I knew why the key disappeared. People were so mentally scarred by what they saw that they didn’t want to waste the time going back into the station on their way home to get a scalding hot shower.

While I wiggled into the skintight dress, I tried my best not to let any part of my body touch the dirt-encrusted walls. When my pants accidentally touched the floor as I was taking them off, I decided just to toss them. It was either that or burn them when I got home, and I was pretty sure I didn’t want to contaminate my car with any germs. As for my shoes, I would hose them off with some of the body disinfectant when I got home. Until then, I would throw them in the trunk.

After washing and drying my hands, I used a paper towel to open the door. I received quite a few looks when I reentered the station outfitted in my sexy dress. I managed to make it almost back to my car before I received a blaring catcall from a trucker, which was just the icing on the cake to a truly horrific experience. Considering all I had been through, I had more than earned some mind-blowing sex.

Once I was back inside the safety of my locked car, I picked up my phone and started my Internet search. But the one bar I had on my reception meant I wasn’t able to find jack shit. I had two choices. I could go back inside and ask the asshat sales lady if she knew where I could get a drink and some dick, or I get back on the road and try to find a place with better cell reception.