Dream a Little Dream (Chicago Stars, #4)(92)

She wanted to curl up in some dark corner and howl. Instead, she forced herself to stay where she was and finish this. “I’m not going to change my mind. I won’t marry you. Kristy already called her parents, and they’re going to send me two bus tickets. I’ll work next weekend, and then Edward and I are leaving for Florida.”

“No!”

Both of them jumped as Edward came running around the corner of the house, tears streaming down his face.

The bottom dropped out of her stomach. What had she done? She’d planned to break the news gently, not like this.





“I don’t want to go to Flor’da!” Tears streamed down Edward’s flushed cheeks. He flailed his arms and stomped his feet. “We’re going to stay here! We’re not going! We’re staying here! ”

“Oh, sweetheart.” She rushed to him and tried to put her arms around him, but he batted them away. For the first time since he’d been a toddler, he was caught in the throes of a full-fledged temper tantrum.

“We live here!” he screamed. “We live right here, and I’m not going!” He whirled toward Gabe. “This is all your fault! I hate you!”

Once again, she tried to embrace him. “Sweetheart, let me explain. Settle down so we can talk about this.”

He sprang away and hurled himself at Gabe, hitting him in the knees. “This is your fault! You’re making us go!”

Gabe regained his balance and caught Edward by the shoulders. “No! I don’t want you to go! I’m not making you go.”

Edward punched the side of his leg. “Yes, you are!”

Gabe caught his fists. “Calm down, Chip, and let your mother talk.”

But Edward wouldn’t be appeased. Once again he began to stomp his feet. “You hate me, and I know why!”

“I don’t hate you.”

“Yes, you do! You hate me because I’m not strong.”

“Chip . . .” Gabe regarded Rachel helplessly, but she didn’t know what to do any more than he did.


Edward jerked away and flew to Rachel’s side. No longer yelling, he gulped for air between sobs. “Don’t you . . . marry him, Mommy. You marry . . . Pastor Ethan!”

She squatted next to him, appalled that he’d overheard that part of their conversation. “Oh, Edward, I’m not going to marry anyone.”

“Yes! Marry . . . Pastor Ethan. Then we . . . we can stay here.”

“Pastor Ethan doesn’t want to marry me, baby.”

Once again she tried to embrace him, but he pushed away. “I’ll tell him to!”

“You can’t tell grown-ups something like that.”

A wrenching sob. “Then marry . . . Rosie’s daddy. I like him. He calls . . . me Chip and . . . he gave me a . . . head rub.”

“Rosie’s daddy is married to Rosie’s mom. Edward, I’m not going to marry anybody.”

Once again, Edward turned back to Gabe, but this time he didn’t attack. His chest spasmed in hiccups of emotion. “If my mom . . . marries you, do we gets to . . . stay here?”

Gabe hesitated. “It’s not that easy, Chip.”

“You live here, don’t you?”

“Now I do.”

“You said you want to get married to her.”

Gabe cast a helpless look in her direction. “Yes.”

“Then I’ll let you. But only if we get to stay here.”

Edward was no longer the only one crying. Rachel felt as if she were being ripped apart. She knew she was doing the right thing, but there was no way she could explain it to him. “I can’t,” she managed.

Edward’s head dropped. A tear splattered on the toe of his sneaker, and all the fight seemed to leave him. “I know it’s because of me,” he whispered. “You said you won’t marry him because he don’t like me.”

How could she ever make him understand something so complex? “No, Edward,” she said firmly. “It’s not like that at all.”

He regarded her with subtle rebuke, as if he knew she weren’t being honest.

Gabe’s interruption startled her. “Rachel, leave us alone for a few minutes, will you? Chip and I have to talk.”

“I don’t—”

“Please.”

She’d never felt more helpless. Surely he wouldn’t try to hurt Edward even more. No, he’d never do that. And the relationship between them couldn’t get any worse. Still, she hesitated. And then she realized she had no idea how to handle the situation herself, so maybe she should let Gabe try. “Are you sure about this?”

“Yes. Go on.”

She hesitated for a moment longer, but his implacable expression told her he wasn’t going to change his mind, and the cowardly part of her needed to get away, just for a few minutes, so she could put herself back together again. Finally, she gave a reluctant nod and slowly rose to her feet. “All right, then.”

Now that she’d agreed, she didn’t know where to go. She couldn’t bear the idea of being cooped up inside with nothing to do but pace from room to room. She turned toward the path into the woods instead, where she and Edward walked nearly every day, and prayed she was doing the right thing by leaving them alone.