Downfall(72)

“I haven’t been feeling well. My stomach is upset all the time and I can’t sleep through the night. I’ve been feeling off for a couple of days, and I remembered this was exactly how I felt when I was pregnant with Noble.”

“But how? I mean, I know how… but we’re always safe.” Always.

She sniffed again and offered up a watery smile. “I’m not pregnant, Solo. I must be getting the flu or all the stress from finals coming up might be getting to me.”

I huffed out a breath and reached out to smooth a few flyaway strands of hair away from her pale face. “Okay. You aren’t knocked up, then why are you crying?” If she felt so bad it brought on tears, I was taking her to the emergency room. I would take care of her however she needed me to.

“I’m crying because when I saw the test was negative, I realized how much I wanted it to be positive. I love being a mom. We’ve never talked about having more kids in the future, but I want to. I want to have your baby, Solo.”

I was stunned how passionate and sure she sounded. Expanding our family wasn’t something that came up in conversation on the regular, but it seemed like she’d been giving it a lot of thought. Surprisingly, the idea wasn’t at all terrifying. I never thought I would have time for kids, or to be an active and involved parent. She was the one who taught me to make time for the things in life that mattered most.

I hugged her harder and kissed her on the top of the head again. “I think I’d like that, you carrying my kid.” Saying it out loud gave the idea roots to grow and sprout. “You want a ring on your finger and my last name before we make that happen?” Marriage was another thing we never really talked at length about. It didn’t matter to me one way or another, and she said she was happy as long as we slept in the same bed each night. But having another kid might be a game changer.

“I don’t need those things, but it might make it easier when you formally adopt Noble.” That was something we definitely had talked about. No one was ever taking that dark-haired cutie away from me, and I wanted everything I could think of in place in order to ensure no one even tried.

Lifting off the bed, I moved so I could pick up Orley in my arms. I shifted around so I could lie her down and tuck her in under the down comforter. I kissed her forehead and realized she was indeed warm.

“Okay. I’ll get you a ring, and then we’ll make a baby. But first, you get some rest and I’m going to run to the store and grab you some Nyquil. Gotta make sure all of this baby talk isn’t because you have a fever.” I winked at her to let her know I was kidding.

She reached for my hand before I could move away from the side of the bed. There were tears in her eyes once again when she whispered, “Thank you for always taking such good care of me.”

Deciding I cared more about her than her germs, I kissed her long and hard. “Always.”

I would always take care of her, because it wasn’t until she came along and set my world on fire that I realized I needed someone to take care of me, too. She called me her hero and told me I saved her all the time.

I often wondered if she realized she was the one who rescued me from myself and the joyless life that was doing its best to swallow me whole.

She joked that falling in love with her had been my downfall, but she was wrong. Falling in love with her was my salvation.



The End