Don’t You Forget About Me(106)

A lady-gasp goes up from the table, and I blush.

‘What I really mean by dinner is, I wonder if you’d like me to take your top off again in a hurry, and this time not because it’s covered in stripper urine.’

I guffaw.

‘A lot of history here indeed,’ Rav murmurs.

‘I wonder if you’d like to end up spending so much time at each other’s places, sooner or later it makes sense to get our own place. With room for Keith, obviously.’

‘Who’s Keith?’ Clem loud-whispers.

‘My dog,’ Lucas says.

‘Oh I’m sorry I thought you had an idiot brother or something. Carry on,’ Clem says, while Rav puts his hand over her mouth.

‘I have that as well,’ Lucas says.

‘What about room for Jammy?’ I say.

‘And Jammy, certainly.’

Lucas draws breath.

‘I wondered if you wanted someone to help zip your dress up before a night out. I wondered if you wanted someone to call first in a crisis. I wondered if you wanted someone to text to bring you fish and chips when you can’t be arsed with a proper dinner. I wondered if you wanted someone in your corner when you visit your family, someone who will tell them how lucky they are to have you. I wondered if you wanted someone to fetch the Lucozade when you have the flu. I wondered whether, if that comedian shitbag ever comes within ten paces of you, I can hit him in the face. To be honest if I see him, I will probably do that whether I’m your boyfriend or not because he is an utter shitbag and he has it coming. No court in the land would convict.’

My friends applaud and shout ‘hear hear’. Lucas reaches out and takes my hand in his, his warm fingers curling around my palm.

‘I wondered, Georgina, if you could imagine being in love with me again, the way I’m in love with you. And that given you’re the best thing to ever happen to me, if you could give me the chance to try to be the best thing that ever happened to you.’

‘Ah my God,’ I say, because I’m half-laughing, half-crying, as it seems is everyone else, except Rav, who mutters: ‘Well cheers, the bar just went up for the rest of us.’

I stand up, straightening my tiara.

‘I want all those things, from you. Thank you. Offer accepted. I’m going to hold you to the chippy run in particular.’

‘Did I embarrass you? I think I made good on only embarrassing myself.’

‘You … I falter, as declaring yourself is difficult enough with this little gallery of eager faces in the Lescar. ‘… It was everything I could ever want, to be honest. You are everything I could ever want.’

It wasn’t embarrassing until now, but reaching the And We Kiss moment with onlookers? Yeah, that is.

We look at each other uncertainly and Lucas says: ‘Excuse us for a moment, please,’ and holds his hand out for mine. I take it and let myself be led out of the pub. We head through the doors and into the arctic cold of the street and Lucas turns, pulls me to him and kisses me with a passion that is still somehow unexpected. It’s got a purpose to it that’s so incredibly hot: something he’s waited and planned and wanted to do, and now he’s demonstrating just how much he wanted to do it. I can feel our future in this kiss.

I kiss him back just as hard, my fingers in his hair, this time not needing to persuade him of anything, not having to hope. I thought nothing could rival how we felt as teenagers, but I was wrong. This time is better. This time, we’re not blank sheets of paper, we’re grown-ups who’ve written who we are, who’ve decided who we want to be. We’re bringing so much more to each other, and saying we want to share it.

When we break free, Lucas says, nodding his head towards the door: ‘Sorry, but I have my limits with what I’m prepared to do with an audience. I’m not that modern.’

‘Neither am I,’ I laugh. ‘I’m stuck in … I think 2005 was the glory year, for me?’

‘And for me,’ he says, hand on my face. ‘God. Georgina. I’ve missed you. Why didn’t you call me?’ Lucas moves both his hands to my upper arms. ‘All you had to do was say you wanted me around, and I’d have come running.’

‘You went back to Ireland!’

‘I only said that when you asked me, to make it clear I wasn’t – you know. Looming over you, and moping. Haunting you, like Heathcliff. I thought it was obvious I’d be back and forth. I thought the speech about how I was dementedly in love with you was enough encouragement, if that’s what you needed.’

‘In love with me twelve years ago.’

‘Why would that have changed? Nothing’s changed. Actually, that’s not true. I feel even more for you now than I did then.’

Lucas and I nearly lean in to kiss again, and Lucas hesitates. ‘I have to say I’m only one more kiss away from saying let’s sack your birthday plans off and dragging you off to my cave, and that feels rude to your friends. Shall we save it for later?’

I laugh, and agree. Later. I can hardly believe it will arrive, and yet this time, it will.

We turn, go back inside, still holding hands.

‘I’m thinking you’re stopping then, Lucas,’ Rav picks up a pint and places it in front of him.

Lucas shrugs off his coat and takes the spare chair, still holding my hand tightly, and Clem and Jo clasp his arm in the over familiarity of half-cut emotion. A small moment is incredibly large, and everything has changed.