Dirty Little Secrets (Dirty Little #1)(6)

Caleb.

It’s nice to know that despite my track record of making terrible decisions, that I’m still capable of making good ones, too. Like deciding to go down to the bar last night? That was an excellent decision. My mind was racing, and I could tell that I was on the verge of a panic attack, so I thought I’d slip on the one dress I managed to bring with me when I left Chicago, go down and have a drink to take the edge off. For a couple of hours, I wanted to pretend I was a person who didn’t have a care in the world. Fake it till you make it, right?

It worked.

Last night, I felt like myself again. I’ve only been running for four days, but they’ve been the four longest days of my life. It’s kind of amazing how easy it is to forget all about yourself when you’re in the middle of an incredibly stressful situation.

Then Caleb showed up, and I felt like me: twenty-three year-old Mia Briggs, computer programming phenom from Chicago, who is a capable, smart woman. Caleb made me feel wanted and sexy, two things I haven’t felt in a very long time. Of course, after our conversation in the bar, I thought we were headed for a one-night stand. He threw me for a loop when he didn’t even try to kiss me, but the thought that he wants more than just a quick f*ck, well…that turned me on enough to make up for it. Which is a little strange, considering I’m not sure that I can give him what he’s looking for.


Actually, I am sure. I can’t give him what he’s looking for.

Caleb is a nice distraction, though, and maybe a distraction is just what I need. I’m an intelligent woman, I don’t have any doubts about that, but I’m having a hard time figuring out how to get myself out of this situation. In the past, whenever I was stuck on a programming issue, I’d spend a day at the movies, or hang out with a friend.

Now, everyone that I know is in a city that’s 800 miles away, under the impression that I was a last-minute addition to a big-time software programming contract with a company in London. These people are more than acquaintances, but I’m not particularly close with them. I know for sure some of them would question me just up and disappearing one day, so I concocted a cover story, just to be safe. Keeping them in the dark is the best way to protect everyone who knows me, even a little. I don’t think Privya would go to them looking for me, but better safe than sorry. If he does, and someone lets it slip that I’m in London, well…that’s another false trail for him to follow that will buy me more time here in New York.

There’s only one person in Chicago who knows even a little bit about what’s going on, and it’s time for me to give him a call. I reach into my pocket, and pull out the untraceable burner phone I brought with me. My fingers tremble as I dial his number.

“Hello?”

“Marcus, it’s me.” I’m speaking quietly for some reason, as if I’m worried about anyone on the other end somehow overhearing my voice.

Marcus lets out a long, audible sigh. “I’ve been worried about you,” he says. “Where are you?”

I pull a pillow onto my lap, and run my fingertip along the seam. “I think it’s probably better if I don’t say.”

“Okay, yeah. That’s a good idea.” There’s a long pause before he says, “Everything is okay here. Nothing out of the ordinary.”

Relief washes over me, like I’ve been doused with a bucket full of it. Just that small bit of news makes me feel better. “Thanks for letting me know.”

“No problem.”

Marcus and I have been best friends since we were kids, and we’ve never had a stilted conversation like this. It feels wrong. Off. Like everything in the world has shifted ten inches to the right, but I’m still standing firmly in place. “How’s your mom?”

“She’s better. We’re moving her into her new facility next week.”

I take a deep breath, and fight back the tears that are pricking at my eyes. “Good, I’m glad.”

“I wish you would’ve let me come with you.”

“No, my name is the only one attached to this,” I remind him. “At least you’re safe, and you can let me know what’s going on there.”

“How am I supposed to do that? I don’t even have a number I can reach you on!” Marcus says, his voice louder than it probably should be.

“I’ll call you in a day or two,” I tell him, trying to calm him down. “It’ll be okay.”

“And if it’s not? What if I don’t hear from you? What am I supposed to do then?”

I take a deep breath, because I don’t like thinking about that possibility. “Then I guess it turns out that coming here wasn’t so clever after all,” I say, trying to lighten the situation. I can’t have Marcus panicking too, I’m doing that enough for the both of us.

“Mia,” he says quietly, and I know what’s coming next. “Return the money, hide it as an accounting error or something. You can do that, can’t you? We’ll think of something else.”

“We’ve been trying to think of something else for months, Marcus. Time was running out, and I had to do something, okay? It’s not like he didn’t deserve it.” This is what I tell myself to not crumple up in shame and embarrassment at what I’ve done. “He deserves that and more for what he did to my dad, and to your mom. He’s the reason she’s in that facility; the least he can do is pay for it. It’s going to happen to someone else, and-”