Desperately Seeking Epic(90)
“It’s time, Clara,” Paul tells me. I’m shaking I’m so terrified. I know I’m safe. I know Paul has done this a million times. I just can’t help it. But I know it’s time. I put my feet out on the small platform, bracing myself against the wind. He’s explained the procedure to me several times, so I know what to do when he tells me to.
“On the count of three,” he yells. “One. Two. Three!”
Then . . . we’re flying. For a few seconds, I don’t breathe as the adrenaline pumps through me. The dive seems to go in slow motion, yet it happens in the blink of an eye.
When he pulls the chute, we lurch slightly and our fall slows. The view is breathtaking. “This is amazing,” I say.
Paul chuckles. “See what you’ve been missing out on?”
I look up as much as I can, and see something floating off the side of the chute. The way the fading sunlight is shining, I can’t make it out. “What is that?” I inquire.
“Her purple scarf,” he replies.
My heart swells with love for this man as my eyes tear up. “Paul,” I say his name. “Thank you for being so strong through all of this. I couldn’t have survived it without you.”
“I’m here, Clara. I’m not going anywhere. I promise. Where you go, I go.”
I let out a soft sigh. They were the exact words I needed to hear. We’ve been through so much. We’ve both made so many mistakes. We’ve both lost greatly. But we still have each other. No other man has made me feel the way Paul James does. No man ever will.
He is it for me.
“Are you ready?” I ask.
“Let’s let our girl fly,” he answers.
I clutch the bag once more, saying one last farewell to my daughter. “Live free, Neena. I love you.” Opening the bag, I tilt it, slowly letting Neena’s ashes drift softly into the air. The ashes float out in a stream, dissipating before us. When I’ve poured the last of them, I smile through my tears as Paul kisses my temple.
Then he whispers, “Rest in peace, baby.”
The office is closed when I pull into the parking lot. The hours were different years ago when I came here almost weekly to interview Paul and Clara. I went to their house first, but there was no answer when I knocked. With an hour to kill, I play on my phone as I sit in my rental car and wait.
It’s twenty before noon when a Ford truck pulls in and parks beside me. He’s oblivious to me being there. I had backed into the parking spot. When Paul climbs out, I smile to myself. Last I saw him his hair was dark with hints of gray, but now it would seem the opposite. Gray hair or not, he still looks incredibly handsome.
As he unlocks the office door, I climb out of my car and approach him, clearing my throat to alert him of my presence. He turns and it takes him a few seconds to recognize me, but when he does, his face lights up with a gigantic grin.
“You sure grew up,” he chuckles as he opens his arms up for a hug.
I snort a laugh and hug him. He’s more mellow now. “I’m all grown up, but I’m still a pain in the ass.”
“I don’t doubt it for a second.”
We pull away and he cocks his head to the side, a thoughtful expression on his face. “How have you been?”
I give a nervous smirk. “Good,” I answer halfheartedly. Paul’s eyes narrow and I can tell he isn’t buying my answer. “I was hoping to catch you and Clara together.”
Paul turns back to the door and proceeds to unlock it while he says, “Let’s give her a call. She went into town this morning to do some shopping but she should be back home by now.”
He holds the door open for me and after I enter, he says, “Be right back. No one’s here yet. Bowman and Larry won’t be in for another hour or two. Make yourself comfortable.”
Leaving me in the front office area, he rushes to the back. I’m assuming to call Clara. I let my gaze lazily search the walls, lingering on each photo. Most are of Paul and the other jumpers diving alone or tandem with clients. Then there’s some of Paul and Clara. I smile and my heart swells when I find one of them on their wedding day shoving cake in each other’s faces. It feels good to see them happy. I always wondered if they’d made it after Neena passed away.
Paul returns and hands me a bottled water and together we stare at the wedding photo. “How’d you convince her to say yes?” I tease as I twist the cap on the bottle.
Paul shrugs. “I have no idea,” he laughs.
We make small talk for a few minutes before Clara arrives, breezing in with a wide smile on her face. I’m amazed at how well she looks. I thought they’d both look so much older, but time has been good to them.
“Ashley.” She beams as she embraces me, squeezing me tightly. “How are you?”
“I’m good,” I admit. Clara pulls away, her suspicious gaze running over my body.
Does she know? “Are you hungry?”
“No, I’m good.”
We all take a seat and chat about the past. They ask about Zane and Mills, who are both married with children. Zane works for his father’s company laying concrete, and Mills is a graphic designer for a small company in Manhattan. It’s been years since we’ve seen each other, but Facebook allows us to stay in touch.
“And where did life lead that stubborn little pain in the ass we met years ago?” Paul jests. It’s no secret he thought that about me. And he was right. I was hungry and relentless. I was a teenager trying to tell a story that was beyond my ability to truly understand. I knew it was a love story. I also knew it was a sad story. But I had no idea the magnitude and depth that Desperately Seeking Epic really entailed. I was proud of what I put together. The story was a hit and catapulted me into the spotlight. After all, I was only seventeen and somehow I’d managed to get this family to give me exclusive rights to their story. It’s always been their story. But my youth prevented me from seeing it as such. Back then, it was my story. It was my platform. And as I went on talk shows and became the one being interviewed, I never thought differently.