Desperate Girls (Wolfe Security #1)(98)
“I’m leaving soon,” he said.
“When?”
“Friday evening.”
They only had two more days together. But they didn’t even have that, because Erik needed to spend most of that time at headquarters.
“It’s a twelve-week job,” he said. “I’ll have a few days’ leave after six.”
“Six weeks?”
He nodded, watching her reaction. “I’ll be back as soon as I can, and I’d like to see you. I’ll miss you like hell while I’m gone, Brynn.”
She smiled. “Promises, promises.”
“What?”
“Nothing.”
“You don’t think I’m serious.”
She shrugged. “It’s okay. I mean, Hawaii, right? I doubt you’ll have time to miss anything.”
“Brynn, look at me.”
She did, and the raw vulnerability in her eyes worried him. She’d had that look there since he’d seen her on the rooftop with Ross.
She tugged her hand away.
“Don’t do that.” He leaned forward and took her hand again. “Don’t blow me off. I’m serious about you.”
She looked away and shook her head.
“What? Talk. Because you obviously have something on your mind.”
“Okay, you’re right. Here it is, full disclosure. I don’t have a good track record with relationships, Erik. Actually, my track record’s pathetic.”
“You’re talking about your ex?”
“And pretty much every guy I’ve known since college.” She sighed and folded her arms over her middle. “I don’t communicate well. I let my work consume me. I shut myself off from people, and then they end up lying and cheating on me.”
Erik dipped his head down and looked at her. “I’m not like that.”
“I know.”
“So what’s the problem?”
“Relationships are the problem. People hurt each other, whether they want to or not. That’s life.”
She sounded so convinced, and his heart ached for her. She’d been burned repeatedly by people she trusted, starting with her own father, who’d walked out on her family.
Erik shifted his chair so he was facing her and unfolded her arms. He took her hands in his and looked her in the eye. “What if I tell you I have no intention of hurting you?”
She gave him a baleful look. “That’s sweet. But even if you don’t intend to do it, it happens. Trust me on this, because I think I have more experience with relationships than you do.”
He smiled.
“What?”
“Come here,” he said, pulling her into his lap.
“I’m too heavy.”
“You’re perfect.” He arranged her legs over the side of the chair and looked at her, sliding his hand over her smooth thigh. “Give me a chance to show you how good we could be together. While you’re busy trying to prove me wrong, we might actually build something solid.”
She looked at him with those deep blue eyes.
“I don’t trust myself right now, Erik.”
“You don’t have to trust yourself. You just have to trust me.”
“I want to, but . . .”
“What?”
“I’m afraid of what could happen.”
Now they were getting to the real issue. She looked uncomfortable, but at least she was making eye contact.
“I’ve never felt like this before, Erik. So emotionally . . . churned up. When I’m with you, I just . . .” She let the words trail off.
“I know.” He touched her cheek. “Me too.”
Relief filled her eyes. But then she looked troubled again. “I’ve always been the one to keep my distance. To end a relationship when it got messy or complicated. But the thing is, I don’t feel any distance with you.”
“Good.”
“How is that good? This is a terrible time to start a relationship, and you’re leaving anyway, so what’s the point?”
He kissed her. Softly at first, but then he kept at it until her hands slipped around his neck and her tongue tangled with his. He slid his palms over her hips, kissing her and taking in everything about her that he’d come to need.
Slowly, he pulled away. “That’s the point.”
Friday came way too soon.
Erik was up before the sun. Brynn lay in her bed in the dark, pretending to be asleep as he dressed for his morning run and slipped out of the house. When he was gone, she got up and shuffled to the kitchen to make coffee. Now that the media had dissipated, they’d spent the night at her place, and she had to admit it was a relief to be home.
She took her mug onto the screened porch and curled up on the wicker sofa, letting her thoughts flow along with her tears as the sky went from black to indigo to gray. She was still in shock from everything, and her emotions were all over the map.
She’d been so wrong. About so many things. Days ago, she’d actually prided herself on her talent for reading people. She could read a jury. A witness. But those closest to her? Not at all. How had she been such a horrible judge of character?
Ross had left a gaping wound in her chest, and she didn’t know whether it was his death or his betrayal that hurt worse. She closed her eyes to block it out, along with the self-doubt that had been plaguing her for days now.