Delayed Penalty (Crossing the Line, #1)(19)

When the doctor left, she turned her attention to me.

"Hi," I said, because I was stupid and couldn't think of anything else to say.

"Wow, you're bigger than I expected." Ami blinked, the motion and her words bringing me from my thoughts and back to her.

Say what?

I just smiled. What the f*ck do you say in a moment like this? "Hey, glad you're okay."

No that seemed too…cheesy?

I nervously cleared my throat, trying to gain some composure, if I even could.

Ami must have sensed the edginess surrounding me and motioned to the chair I'd spent almost every night in wondering what this moment would be like. "You can sit…if you want."

So I sat, awkwardly, but I did sit. She watched my every move, her eyes roaming over my body again. I could feel the rush of blood to my face, and other places, because she was watching me so closely.

There was another round of some awkward silence but more from the both of us this time.

I cleared my throat again. It was the only way I could get my words out. "How are you feeling?"

That seemed to spark the fire she needed to talk as well. "Thank you for what you did. I don't know how I can ever thank you for saving me."

"No thanking necessary." My elbows rested uncomfortably on my knees, unable to relax, knees bouncing. "I couldn't leave you out there."

There was a nervous energy swirling around the room, and every breath I took, she did the same, as if we were trying to breathe for each other, say what the other needed. Stumbling over words, we talked about the hospital staff and what they did to save her, but then we were left in silence again.

Ami, noticing the silence had settled, let out a small soft laugh. "Do you know Wendy?"

"Yeah, we've known each other for a few weeks at least."

She nodded, her eyes on her hands. Thankfully, the bruises were disappearing, and if you looked at her now, aside from the bandaged head and pale face, you'd never know she'd been injured with a smile and eyes like that.

But if you looked close enough, and I did, her pain, her memories, what she wouldn't say, was written in the frown she tried to hide when you'd look away or the heavy blinking and the glossy stare.

Wendy had told me her memory surrounding that night was gone, and it may very well have been, but there was a deeper part, a darker part of her that knew pieces of what happened.

She must have noticed I was watching and looked over at me and smiled. I did the same, feeling that connection I'd always felt with her grow a little stronger with her breathtaking smile. "They cut my hair, didn't they?" her hand reached up to touch the side of the bandage and then fell back to the bed.

"Yeah, they had to," I said, looking at my hands and my swollen knuckles from fighting Grady earlier. "It'll grow back, though." I gave her a wink before I realized what I did.

But then she smiled again, seeming to get lost in my words anytime I spoke.

I wanted to say so much, but I couldn't. The words still weren't there, and I didn't want to scare her with everything I had wanted to ask her. Fuck, I was scaring myself with how I was reacting. Image if I could have spoken!

"You must be tired," I said, watching her again. "I should let you get some rest."

Her face fell slightly, and I could tell she didn't want to me to leave.

"Oh, okay." She looked down again, her fingers fidgeting with the IV tube in her hand.

"I just thought…" Fuck. I wanted so bad to stop staring at her, but I couldn't. Her eyes flickered between my eyes and my mouth as we stared at each other.

"I get it if you have to leave. Thanks for coming to say hello."

Then I thought I could stay until she fell asleep. God knows I didn't want to leave. Here was a perfect excuse.

"I could stay…if you want," I suggested, not really wanting to leave. "I used to just sit here and watch movies."

Those bright blue eyes looked even brighter and lit up her face. "That sounds good."

She reached for the remote beside her bed the same time I did, and our fingertips grazed. It wasn't the first time I had touched her, but it was the first time I had touched her. Before there was nothing there. Now, I felt that f*cking touch from the tips of my fingers to my toes.

Leaning back in the chair, not knowing what else to do, she looked up at me, and I was gone. Fucking gone. I knew then why I couldn't not come here every day. This girl had a hold on me.

I knew why she wanted me there. She didn't want to be alone, and I didn't want her to be. It was part of the reason I kept coming to the hospital. She had no one right now. If I didn't come, who would?

I couldn't tell you what movie was playing. My eyes were only on her, in a non-creepy stalker way. She seemed different. Of course she seemed different. She was awake, dumb ass.

We ended up watching a movie that was on one of the basic cable channels, and before I knew it, I started nodding off.

When I woke up, Ami was asleep, curled to the side with a peacefulness about her, so I snuck out quietly. I left a note beside her bed that said: I'll see you tomorrow.

When I closed the door behind me, I leaned against it and closed my eyes, then slid down the length of the door until I was seated on the floor. I pressed the heels of my palms against my eyes, trying to hold back any emotion I had. She was awake and that attraction, that draw that had kept me coming back, was intensified to the point where I knew I'd never be able to leave this girl alone.