Deep (Stage Dive, #4)(69)
“Yeah, I’m getting that.” One side of his mouth tipped up. “You want me to sue for defamation? I can get the lawyers onto it now, if you want. See what we can do. But they probably can’t do much. The press had a field day with Jimmy, and we could never get a retraction on even the most out-there stuff they wrote. But if that’s what you want…”
With a sigh, I went back to pacing. “It’s out there. No matter what, it’s out there now.”
A slow nod. “Yeah, sweetheart. It is.”
“I just … I never thought this would impact on my future this way. I knew studying would have to take a backseat for a few years to motherhood.” I pulled my blond hair back off my face, giving it a fierce tug. “I knew Bean would have to come first, that’s the reality of it. But I thought one day…”
“You will get to finish your study and practice psychology. Don’t you dare give into this shit.” Ben sat forward, elbows on his knees. “There will always be some f*cknut out there saying something, trying to bring you down just to make a buck or because they can. Because their own lives are shit. You cannot let them win.”
“They’re saying it to a potential audience of billions on the Internet, Ben.”
“I do not care,” he said, eyes blazing with anger. “You will not let these shitheads win. You’re better than that. Stronger.”
I stared at him, amazed. “You really believe that?”
“I know it. From the minute word got out you were pregnant, you weren’t looking for someone to blame. You were pulling yourself together, planning ahead for your baby.”
I stood taller, just looking at him. It was as if I could feel myself being stronger just because he believed it.
“Well?” he asked.
“To be honest, I was kind of upset with your penis and testes for a while. I may have called your sperm some bad names.”
He chuckled. “Yeah? How you feel about my reproductive organs now?”
A sudden urge to burn up the panicky energy raced through me. “I feel that I’d very much like to fire-truck you.”
Once more he sat back, arms spread out along the back of the couch. Such a slow, filthy smile on his handsome face. “Just so happens, I’d very much like to be fire-trucked by you.”
“Child-appropriate dirty talk. There’s something very wrong with that.” I wandered over to him, kicking off my flats. Next came unhooking my hairband waist rigging so I could push down my jeans. My top and bra disappeared in a flash, leaving my panties for lucky last.
And all the while Ben sat there, taking me in, mouth slightly open in appreciation. “Fuck, you’re pretty. And I love it when you get all riled up and righteous.”
“My bearded beauty.”
He laughed, hands reaching for my hips. “At your service, sweetheart.”
“I’ll hold you to that.” I straddled his lap, bare-ass naked and perfectly content to be so. This was trust, giving him all of me, no holding back. “No more slow.”
His nostrils flared as he inhaled hard. “Whatever you want.”
“You. Just you.”
Our mouths met, kisses hard and soft, sweet and greedy. Everything all at once. Perfect. I slid my hands up beneath his T-shirt, pulling it up over his head. How annoying, leaving his mouth for even a moment. But for skin on skin, these sacrifices must be made. And holy hell, Ben’s skin. All of the art of his tattoos and the hard of his muscles. His hands covered my breasts, ever so gently massaging.
“More or less?” he asked.
“A little more.” Fingers toyed with my nipples, turning me right the hell on. “That’s it.”
I rubbed my bare * against the ridge in his jeans. Who even invented clothes? What an idiot. My hormones ran rife, my skin alive with sensation. Calloused fingers slid down to my round belly, spreading out over it.
“You’re f*cking beautiful, carrying our baby.”
“Glad you think so.”
“Ah, sweetheart. You got no idea. You drive me out of my f*cking mind.”
A hand tangled in my hair, holding me in place for his mouth. He kissed me till my head spun. His tongue exploring my mouth, teasing and tantalizing. I could happily kiss him forever. If only my insides didn’t feel so empty and needy. A thumb toyed with my clit, sliding back and forth through the ample wetness, raising my awareness of just how turned on I was. Like I needed reminding. Him in me now was the only beat running through my brain. The abrasive rub of his jeans felt … interesting good. For sure I’d left a hell of a wet patch to testify to that. But I seriously needed to get at what lay beneath, and I needed it now.
I raised up as high as I could on my knees, hands tugging at his belt buckle. “Off!”
“Where’s the manners, sweetheart? What kind of example you setting, hmm?”
I groaned. “Please, Ben, will you take your pants off for me? It’s kind of important.”
“Sure thing, Liz. Thanks for asking so nicely.” He wriggled down a little, dealing with his belt and jeans button and zipper far more effectively than I ever could. The thick head of his cock prodded at my slick opening. “Easy. It’s been a while since we did this.”
“I don’t think we’re going to have any problems this time.” Wet as I was, my only fears were for staining the suede couch. No way, however, was I stopping. Expensive furniture be damned.